Drawing is difficult bully to those who do not know what to look for.
Learn to simplify what you see. If your eyesight is good you see far more than you can possibly paint/draw.
* When look at something they don't see more than other people they see less.
* Head is a victim of very poor construction and the 50/50
Dark and light always fall in two directions.
Hatching should follow the form
The visual journey
Drawing/painting is about the establishment of point of origin and the point of insertion.
I find it very useful to think of this process as a journey: you have a starting point or point of departure and you have a destination. Of course your sucess as an artist depends on how you make the trip. Point to point, landmark to landmark, junction to junction.
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I think it is really neat that you have translated my notes into readable form
BTW photo ref is very hard and really should be the last resort <> what tends to happen is that the camera sees much differently than we do and unless one knows the problems to look for they show up in the drawing
Working from photos usually leads to rendering values and shapes and not seeing mass and form <> I never say never but one is generally better working from life, master works and memory <> learn to see what you can see which btw is a great deal more that the camera in many respects.