I hate when I bring myself back into not drawing and it's happening again.
I can't manage to keep myself motivated. I'm too far from where I want to be and too impatient to improve. I find the studies boring. I feel ridiculous I'm still trying and I'm still failing at the basics.
The world has passed me by with new better people doing things way beyond my imagination, nevermind skill. I feel I don't belong anymore and might as well distract myself with something else, so I decide to quit. But then I miss drawing because it was all I could do and I try to re-start and catch up. Then I feel bad and the cycle repeats.
This has been going for ages now. I'm tired of this cycle. Why can't I either quit or continue but make a decision and stick to it?