I bought some acryllics today. I mostly draw and do digital paintings, but I've been wanting to try traditional painting lately. It was the most discouraging experience.
Seriously, does anyone ever just feel like giving up art? I read about Munch and Picasso and all those guys and I know I'll never be that good. For some reason I just feel phony. My art never seems to express what I'm really feeling, and rarely does it look pleasing at all. I feel like sh-t 99% of every day but it never comes out in my drawings. Even some depressing art would make me feel better. My sketches all just look like boring everyday crap, even when I try to let loose and give my drawing hand total freedom, even then the stuff I draw just looks boring. And when I try to focus instead on rigid rules and technique, they STILL look drab. I can't seem to capture anything on paper.
The few friends I do have are, of course, very supportive and tell me how great my stuff is and all that, but the truth is most of the time I don't even have fun doing art, I just keep trying to push myself further and further to get better and better without ever really accomplishing anything. I try to just enjoy it and have fun with it but I feel lost in front of the sketchpad/monitor/canvas. It intimidates me. I don't know how to express what I'm feeling.
Sometimes I just don't want to ever pick up a pencil or brush again. Seems like theres no point to it sometimes.
k... anyways no reply is necessary. I just felt like bitching in a public forum. (sorry)