sora title screen

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  1. #1
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    sora title screen

    hey guys, a battle scene i'm working on in a student game called sora

    what issues need attending to.... damnit lol there's always issues!


    sora title screen

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  3. #2
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    woops sorry bout the size here's a bigger one

    sora title screen

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  4. #3
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    here's a mission complete screen i did for the interface of the game, is it just me or does the mission complete text look way out of place?

    sora title screen

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    hi lincoln. this is azam from school. cool looking stuff. i cant wait to see your game. the background image seems like it could use some work, but i guess you are still working no it so i should probabaly wait till its done. it could be cool to have the image in a brown tone like the old western pics. just an idea.

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  6. #5
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    get rid of those lines that form the silhoutte of those clouds, its more of a distraction than stressing form. try building form on those clouds as it will negate the use of those lines. find images of clouds on google and replicate it.
    Im not really liking the monochromatic color here. Try adding a second color....yellow. Add more yellow tone to the atmosphere/sky and clouds.

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  7. #6
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    This whole piece just strikes me as incredibly...pink...
    I agree with mono about adding some yellows (more like golds, to me, tho') to break up the monochromatic pinkness of this piece.

    The typeface looks out of place, and unimportant. The font is too wiry and wimply, and the bevel/emboss effect, although cool, just doesn't work for the type, although it looks pretty good for the crosshairs.

    I would suggest a bolder font, maybe one of the "military" fonts on the 'Web, or maybe try a "stencil" font...

    And like Mono also wrote, clean up your linework on the clouds, it really drags the overall quality of this piece down, even overpowering the pink...

    ~M

    Change is Inevitable, Growth is Optional
    I am The Choosen One!
    Jason sez: Draw more from Life!

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    sora title screen

    yellowish like that?

    and do the clouds look better or should i clean up the drawing of the clouds instead of just erasing it?

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    sora title screen

    sora title screen


    these paintings weren't originally supposed to be without their linework so there's a few issues with the overall quality of the digital paintjob, but they do the job

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  10. #9
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    good progress.
    Desat that ocean.
    not necessarily the ocean, imo, but something of the 3. (clouds, sky, ocean.)
    ...maybe all.

    Don't touch me!!!
    your not my priest!
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    Definately looks better, the new font works 100 times better. I like how on mission failed you made the red guy (which I am assuming is you) blowing up, but it still looks like he destroyed the blue guy....maybe if its in your timespan make the blue ship look not so beaten in the mission failed screen....other then that, and what others have said, it's pretty cool...

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    Hey Lincoln, it's Dave L here from school
    I'll agree with Azam here.. you're game is lookin freakin sweet so far and I can't wait to see it!

    As for the picture, I'm gonna go by the last couple pictures after the critiques.
    I like how the ships look (might need more crisp highlights cuz they're metallic) but the background is really throwing me off. Normally objects appear more detailed and crisp as you come closer to the foreground, this picture almost seems to be the opposite - with it getting detailed the further it goes back. I absolutely love what you did at the top with the stars fading into the black, and the direction of the clouds really draw the player into the scene. Try putting some more details into the clouds closer to us for example.

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    Um, k here is not some uber not advice...

    When you get the urge to use a big-ass bevel in photoshop, put some ice cubes down your pants. That should ensure that you never, ever do it again. Apart from graphics design work of course.

    Now lets tend to the illustration itself. I think you should stop trying to make it look like a piece of art, because as I just mentioned, it is an illustration. Unless you want to remove the aspects that make it look like an illustration and make it look like a piece of art (up to you). Either way, you have to drop one of the concepts.

    I personally think that it would look great as an illustration, so:
    - clean up those ink lines and make them stronger
    - consider not using a black outline for everything (make the lines colored)
    - some lines aren't needed at all (on the sparkles, the booster engine flames, and other really vague, bright, or transparent things)
    - use a more artistic 3D-izing effect (like carefully chosen gradients)

    Keep in mind that thing I said about the bevels, follow those steps, and I think you could have a really nice illustration for your game.

    As it stands, I have to say that I'm not a big fan of this, for some reason's I've made clear and others as well.

    Keep at it though

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