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  1. #1
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    Marmalade Jane's Pool Hall

    New project! Working on Marmalade Jane's Pool Hall. Creating this for a friend of mine. She wanted a scene with some cats playing pool. The dog in the background is an old pet she used to have and thought it would be a nice touch to add her to the piece. As always comments and critiques are welcome
    Name:  MJPoolHall-RoughSketch.jpg
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  3. #2
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    At this late stage my advice is probably unwelcome, but examine the positioning of your figures. One is smack in the center of the image and there's a certain inauthentic quality of atmosphere caused by having the other figures symetrically grouped in twos on either side of the center figure.
    Sketchbook

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  5. #3
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    Too many balls.


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  7. #4
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    @david_a_ray thank you for your feedback. This painting is still at an early stage so I was able to implement your suggestions. I moved the center figure forward and to the right, thus grouping the three characters on the right and the two on the left. This definitely improved the composition.
    @onemax I erased a few of the balls.

    Name:  MJs_UndergroundPoolHall-002.jpg
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  9. #5
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    It looks good, but the one thing I keep looking at is the cat on the left. Is there a reason he's looking at the camera? It doesn't fit with the scene as everyone else is preoccupied.

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  11. #6
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    The reason he is looking at the camera is that he is greeting whoever just walked up to the pool table. I figured it would be a good way to engage the viewer, but if its too distracting I can have him looking elsewhere.

  12. #7
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    it seems like you have just drag the previously centered character to the right but you need to change the proportions according to perspective.
    Doesn't seems to fit anymore.
    * sticks seems little bit too long but it depends on how tall they are.
    But that cat sit on the chair has a short stick.
    *cat at the far seems like too tall ..
    These are so tiny things.
    I'm not a master to critique things but I love reading them because It helps to learn

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  14. #8
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    Got the value underpainting started. Looking at it now I may need to go back and make a few slight adjustments, but my next step will be the value overpainting.
    Name:  MJs_UndergroundPoolHall-004.jpg
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  15. #9
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    Well, it took me a minute to get it done but here is the value painting for Marmalade Jane's Pool Hall. Depending on what happens with the Campfire here in Chico I may or may not be able to get the color version done soon.
    Name:  MJs_UndergroundPoolHall-004.jpg
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  16. #10
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    The fire didn't move into the city of Chico so I was able to knock out the color version.
    Name:  MJs_UndergroundPoolHal.jpg
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  17. #11
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    Your shadows look dirty, be a little more playful with colour.
    Grinnikend door het leven...

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  19. #12
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    You're not using color temperatures. Your current colors stay the same hue and only change value. This is what gives so many people's work that stale look. As your color changes value it also needs to change temperature. For example: green can warm to yellow or cool towards blue. Just keep the color wheel in the back of your mind. You'll need to make shadows less chromatic/saturated and areas in light more saturated as well.

    Edit: Now that I'm at home I've taken the liberty of tweaking your colors a bit. Remember this is all very much a matter of preference, but I think you're trying to show too much as detail in the scene and it weakens your image. I'd really hone in on your focal point and build the colors, values etc around that. Maybe blur it a bit in less important areas. This gives an added bonus of easy depth. I felt like emphasizing the cat's focus was important since he's the only one taking action. I also remember my own experiences playing pool and how the table sort of fills your vision with green bounced light. So I emphasized that as well. This allows you to have two colors. Green and yellow. These both mix well together and don't create any weird grays like green and purple might. Purple has red in it. Red doesn't mix well with green since they're opposites. I'll shut up now. I hope this of some use.Name:  tweak.jpg
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    Last edited by David_a_ray; 3 Weeks Ago at 10:33 PM. Reason: added color tweakage
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  21. #13
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    Howdy! Really enjoyed the greyscale and working illustrations, but the colors are pretty garish in my opinion. Black shadows make a painting look high contrast and sort of...1999 if you understand what I'm getting at. A couple of adjustment layers as you're adding in color can really help when transitioning from greyscale to color. For example, reducing contrast, playing with curves and layers, using overlay/multiply etc. That being said, it's a heck of a drawing. Sense of space is nicely executed.

    Also...There was a fire? Like an actual fire in the city? Glad you're ok! That's so scary D:
    Twitch: @LDogDraws
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  23. #14
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    I wanna thank everyone who took the time to critique my work I really appreciate it. I tried to incorporate everyone's suggestions into the finishing touches. @mangosalsa not sure if you have heard about the campfire in CA but it completely destroyed our neighboring town called Paradise and it was headed to Chico where I live but our first responders were able to keep the flames at the edge of the town.
    Name:  MJs_UndergroundPoolHall.jpg
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  24. #15
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    hey Jaxeller, nice piece. Don't know if you are still working on this. I think you may have over cooked the colours a bit. I think the point that David_a_ray was making, was more to unify the colours around the subject to draw the eye.(although I could be wrong he/she/they was talking about tempetures!) I would look at desaturating the colours in the background and darkening the backgound and background characters to make the 3 characters at the front the main focus of the piece. You should really see what happens when you add back the local colour to the purple jacket and the red waistcoat and the ginger cats purple tanktop. You will see that it will help the image.

    To simplify what I'm saying: darken and desaturate the background and lighten and enhance the colours in the foreground. the second black and white image you posted shows this perfectly!

    Other things I notice. The foreshortening of the hand on the table not working for the ginger cat and the cat sitting in the background seems to be floating! the light source/s could be a lot brighter i.e. the light over the pool tables.

    Good Luck!
    Last edited by wisecrack; 2 Weeks Ago at 12:40 PM.

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  26. #16
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    I’m glad to hear that you are alright after the fire!

    This is a very nice picture and has a lot going for it - the drawing and values are pretty solid and enjoyable. You don’t really need to add so much blur – in fact, I wouldn’t use any blur at all! (Isn’t it lovely to get two conflicting bits of advice?) If you want a more realistic look, it’s the coloring that needs tweaking, particularly, the environmental lighting.

    Anything that is not so dark as to be jet black is illuminated to some degree by light (this includes shadows). This light not only reveals to us the color of the surface it hits but it has it’s own color (white, pale blue, yellow, ect… ) . These two colors mingle and are reflected back to our eye so we can see them. On their trip across the room, they scatter out, creating the familiar effects of ambient and environmental lighting.
    In your scene you have a lot of green and red reflected light, which is very tricky – they mix to make a dingy brown. The lights are golden, which mixes fine with brown, but still promises a hazy, “smoky” atmosphere. And yet, the shadows are blue. Where did the blue come from? There is hardly a blue thing in the room, let alone natural light.

    Being a complex scene, this piece will need the color re-painted if you wish to change/implement this, but to help explain what I am talking about, I have removed all the blue from the scene and included new colors for the shadows and reflected light. You may or may not choose to keep the clothing color changes and lovely radioactive green pool tables (I hear those are hard to get rid of, anyways ).

    I hope this helps you and keep up the good work!

    (I have included this description in the image since some people like to save these with their pictures to read later.)


    Name:  Cats_Playing_Pool_recolor_of_Jaxeller_s_painting_w_text_by_the_Lady_of_the_Lake.jpg
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  28. #17
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    @ The Lady Of The Lake WOW, thank you so much for your critique. I know that it took some time to write this and do a paint-over and I really do appreciate that you did. I put the blue in the shadows because I had many art instructors in art school tell me that no matter what in dark and shadow areas you always tint it blue. So that's what I have been doing for the past 8 years and you are literally the first person to question me about it and correct me on it and for that I thank you. I have already printed this one out and given it to the client, but after seeing the improvements you have made to it I think I am going to revisit it and make those adjustments for my own knowledge and get it reprinted for my portfolio.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Lady Of The Lake View Post
    I’m glad to hear that you are alright after the fire!

    This is a very nice picture and has a lot going for it - the drawing and values are pretty solid and enjoyable. You don’t really need to add so much blur – in fact, I wouldn’t use any blur at all! (Isn’t it lovely to get two conflicting bits of advice?) If you want a more realistic look, it’s the coloring that needs tweaking, particularly, the environmental lighting.

    Anything that is not so dark as to be jet black is illuminated to some degree by light (this includes shadows). This light not only reveals to us the color of the surface it hits but it has it’s own color (white, pale blue, yellow, ect… ) . These two colors mingle and are reflected back to our eye so we can see them. On their trip across the room, they scatter out, creating the familiar effects of ambient and environmental lighting.
    In your scene you have a lot of green and red reflected light, which is very tricky – they mix to make a dingy brown. The lights are golden, which mixes fine with brown, but still promises a hazy, “smoky” atmosphere. And yet, the shadows are blue. Where did the blue come from? There is hardly a blue thing in the room, let alone natural light.

    Being a complex scene, this piece will need the color re-painted if you wish to change/implement this, but to help explain what I am talking about, I have removed all the blue from the scene and included new colors for the shadows and reflected light. You may or may not choose to keep the clothing color changes and lovely radioactive green pool tables (I hear those are hard to get rid of, anyways ).

    I hope this helps you and keep up the good work!

    (I have included this description in the image since some people like to save these with their pictures to read later.)


    Name:  Cats_Playing_Pool_recolor_of_Jaxeller_s_painting_w_text_by_the_Lady_of_the_Lake.jpg
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