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  1. #1
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    It's too painful I can't take it anymore!

    How the hell do you....

    Chop Onions without being reduced to searingly painful bloated eyeballs crying poisoned onion fumed tears?!?! I've been cooking a looong time and still have not been able to find a way around this. I've tried everything... freezing the onion, cutting them as fast as possible(watch those fingers), putting oil,water,vinegar on the cutting board first, holding your breath, holding your boys, wearing protective eyewear.... ARGH!!!


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  3. #2
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    try putting filters in your nose,
    it's not your eyes that do this to you, it's your nose...
    wear a gasmask...
    Do you know the muffinman?

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    Once you understand what the word "stupid" means - age is no longer a valid excuse for being that way.

  4. #3
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    or try this:
    It's too painful I can't take it anymore!
    darkcult

  5. #4
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    swimming goggles

  6. #5
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    That's weird... they use to bother me a lot, but after a few days of chopping them every night (cause I looooooove onions), they don't bug me anymore. I like the matches thing, cause if nothing else it'll be thoroughly ammusing ;p
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  7. #6
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    OK, I saw this on TV. It was some science show and they had a bunch of people try all the different methods for cutting onions that they'd heard of.

    The person who had the best results submerged their onion in a tub of water and then cut it while it was still submerged.

    Have you tried this? I'm curious to see if it would work for you.

    emily

  8. #7
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    You know the gas mask idea would be great but I already feel silly enough by wearing eyewear... hehehe I'll give the match idea a try, I'd never heard of that. And I bet the underwater method works great, but how in the world would you work that? Like in a giant tupperware maybe, or perhaps in the kitchen sink.... hmmmm.....

    I love onions... sauteed in Olive Oil with a little minced garlic added in... makes the perfect base for practically anything mmmmmmmmmmmmh.

  9. #8
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    you can buy chopped onions in the freezer section of the supermarket (I haven't chopped an onion in at least a year and it's faster, too).

    if you insist on fresh, try a different type of onion. I find Vidalia are less irritating than white or red oinions.
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  10. #9
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    ching the funniest thing is that I am at a cafe right now AND WHAT HAPPENS, they start cutting onions in the back for the morning prep I HAD TO PROP OPEN THE FRONT DOOR OF THE COFFEE SHOP!!!

    ROFL I so feel for you man.

    jeez.

  11. #10
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    I usually cut them into a couple big pieces and rinse off the onion juice a bit. That seems to help. Even vidalias make me cry T_T

  12. #11
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    cutting them while under water in a sink is the best way.. its how i do it, works great

  13. #12
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    breathe through your mouth, not your nose...and youll be fine....if it helps whistle...
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  14. #13
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    I've tried two different methods, and they Do work:
    a) put a lit candle near.
    b) Leave a faucet slightly open near.
    I find the best a)

  15. #14
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    I've heard someone say on Ready Steady Cook (bbc) that you should stick your toungue out while you chop your onions!
    Apearantley the onion fumes sting more in moist places, and the saliva on your tongue should stop it from getting as far as your eyes.. or something like that.
    Haven't tried it yet

  16. #15
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    oh my god this is awesome. what a great community. ca isnt only art tips anymore...

  17. #16
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    Coro: Conceptart.org: your number one source for knowledge about ANYTHING!



    About the onions: Try filling your mouth with as much water as you can keep in there without spilling.

    And when you shop, try picking the ones that look old and feel softer, since the freshest ones are the worst. Well, they taste best, but are worst for your eyes.

  18. #17
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    About the onions: Try filling your mouth with as much water as you can keep in there without spilling.
    lol

    ...I'm sure it would be even more helpful if I put a ziploc bag over my head and duct tape over my eyes, and I should probably plug up all bodily orifices as well... hehehehe

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  20. #19
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    I work at a pizza place...I used to love doing onions, cuz like...I'm not a girly man, so I have pretty dry eyes since I don't cry, haha. So like, it was good for a while...my eyes would water, and then they'd feel nice & fresh and moist for a while.
    But like with a lot of things, prolonged exposure will get you to build up a tolerance.
    I'm back to my dry eyes problem.

    /me cries

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  21. #20
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    I'm gonna try all of these techniques this weekend... am making fresh salsa in batches so will have lots of time to see what works best.

  22. #21
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    Chingwa: do you have a good salsa recipe you would like to share? having grown up on the border of mexico, i have a fondness for good salsa, and am always excited to see different takes...-c36

  23. #22
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    im a salsa snob too.. ive grown up in texas.

    im partial to the selantro and lime content personally.. jalapenios and onion are next in line.. tomato and salt must balance out aswell...

    good salsa is a secret art.


    -Lono

  24. #23
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    I grew up in the Dallas area and have had an unhealthy relationship with Salsa my entire life. I'm currently working on my own mexican salsa recipe (working on formula 4 and 5 this weekend) but it isn't really perfected yet. Currently I'm using tomatoes, tomatillos, onion, garlic, jalapeno, and cilantro and cumin. I want to try lime and maybe a spicier pepper this weekend. I've also been cooking the salsa together on the stove to give it a richer flavor. I'll post the recipe when it approaches perfection

    But I do have an AWESOME recipe for fresh italian salsa. I use this recipe exclusively with Bruschetta (french bread slices with a goatcheese mixture baked into the bread) and It's about as close to heaven as I'll ever get

    Chingwa's Bruschetta and Salsa:

    Ingredients:
    7oz Goat cheese
    4oz softened butter
    2 cups parmesan cheese
    shredded mozzarella
    French Bread
    3 heads Garlic (roasted for best flavor)
    4 Juicy Ripe tomatoes
    1/2 red onion
    4 white mushrooms
    2 tbsp Balsamic Vinnegar
    1/2 cup of your favorite Red wine(or white, but red is better for this)
    3 tbsp dried Basil and Oregano
    2 tbsp Olive Oil
    1/2 tbsp Sea salt (or to taste)

    Salsa:
    Dice 1/2 Garlic, tomatoes, red onion, and mushrooms then place all diced ingredients in a medium mixing bowl or tupperware. Add basil, oregano, olive oil, vinegar, salt, and wine. mix well. Cover and let marinate in refridgerator for 24 hours. I usually vary the quantities of these ingredients to my own tastes, but this'll give you a good starting point.

    Bruschetta:
    Blend goat cheese, butter 1/2 garlic and parmesan cheese in a food processor to form a nice thick mixture. Slice bread in 1/4" slices and lay out evenly on a cookie sheet or broiling pan. Toast slices slightly on 1 side under the broiler. Flip slices over and spread mixture evenly on untoasted side. sprinkle mozzarella on top. Broil on this side until cheese is melted (not too long! gotta watch em!) remove from broiler and serve!

    I usually serve the bruschetta in a basket with the salsa seperate in a bowl. people like to spoon their own salsa on top according to their own tastes... with a glass of white wine Great for picnincs, parties, or whenever!

  25. #24
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    haha, awesome...

    sounds like a plan!
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  26. #25
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    Try cooking with new onions whenever possible. I've heard (though can't say personally) that the chemical that causes your eyes to water builds up when they're stored, so new onions won't have as much of it.
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  27. #26
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    turn on your facet and keep the water running while you cut. some chemical int he onion juice is attracted to water (kinda like how gasoline fumes are attracted to heat) should work. tahts what i do and ive never had any problems
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  28. #27
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    Man...i'm really hungry now

  29. #28
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    OK update...

    burning candle method: doesn't work for me... too bad too cause it was so easy!
    sticking your tongue out: DEFINATELY doesn't work for me... this actually made the onions fumes worse
    Leaving a faucet on: doesn't work for me. Probably just as well as I'd be wasting so much water!

    Still have yet to try filling my mouth with water, holding a burnt out match in my teeth. I've nixed the underwater method for being impractical(for me at least), and the gasmask method for lack of equipment.

    Probably the best thing to do is just build up a tolerance... like that snake wrangler guy on the discovery channel who injected himself with snake venom for 50 years to build an immunity...

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