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Thread: new piece - think it's finished - you tell me.

  1. #1
    mojo Guest

    new piece - think it's finished - you tell me.

    here is my newest piece - all you talented people are really motivating me to not be lazy - I like this piece although I think i will probably be tweaking it here and there - if you have any suggestions I would appreciate them. Let me know what you think.
    It is called
    new piece - think it's finished - you tell me.
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  3. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Pointless Forest/RO
    Thanked 570 Times in 122 Posts
    umm.. nice mood.
    However i feel the need to crit a bit. So here i go.
    You have some proportion isues - the jaw is too big - sendin the ear too far back and making it small small small.
    It's more a perspective problem - the head is tilted down - so the jaw line can't realy be paralell with the ground line.
    Also.. the lips are suffering becouse of this. The lips are facing the viewer too much.
    The neck seems to thick too.
    I hope it helped.

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  4. #3
    mojo Guest
    thanks oblio,
    i knew the ear needed work, but i hadn't noticed that it was too far back until you mentioned it. I will fix that.

    not sure what you mean about the lips or jaw, but will play with it and see if the results are more pleasing.
    I also think the neck needs work, was thinking more in terms of adding a bit of luminosity like the face - and i think probably because it lacks enough definition it looks thick, but when i work on it, will fix.

    I know I am improving, and hope that with the generous advice will get even better.

    Ironically you always have lots of good points for a pointless person

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  5. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    sarasota, fl
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    it might help to add some anatomy, the clavicle should be protruding. i would like to see the head finished also, i think at least drawing the outer hair line would give the picture more closure. good work
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  6. #5
    mojo Guest
    thanks pibb - I agree about the clavicle - the neckline definitely needs work.
    I disagree about the background, it is what I especially like about the piece and is to a great extent part of the concept. She is one with her background, the universe, as though she is still connected in her thoughts-- which suggests the concept of compassion- (to me at least) - I added a touch of hair suggestion at the hairline, I might try adding a couple of small strokes suggesting strands moving to the background a bit lighter, but overall, that was the effect I was going for.

    Thanks though. - I do still appreciate all the comments and criticisms.
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  7. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
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    Here are my crits:
    - there is something flat in eyes and ear,
    - the mouth are little too much left,
    - shadow on the left eye is not so deep like on the hood, and that makes a difference of the body and the clothes,
    - and I think the chin is too small.
    Anyway, I like the way You showed the hair. It makes nice mood.
    ..:: Yaseck ::..
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  8. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Near Boston, MA (USA)
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    Try sharpening the picture in around the center (face and especially eyes). I would leave the rest a bit blurry to help in making the face be the focus.
    Sniff.. sniff..... I stink!
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