My last work and my first post
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    My last work and my first post

    Hello, i'm new of this forum and actually i'm new of the whole illustration world. I started about one year ago practicing with a method, working on my process and studying. I want to start doing some illustration in the field of fantasy art, and my target are tabletop rpgs so all of the stuff i'm producing at the moment is fantasy themed, and i'm trying to match what Art directors seek in a portfolio.
    enough with words, i would appreciate some critiques on my last work. thank you very much in advance!


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    Main 2 things that come to mind are the face is weird. No forehead, eyes feel up too high, things like that. Then the 2nd is obvious there's no source of actual green light in frame. Yet her hand is flat out glowing. Is that coming from her? Since there's nothing being 'produced 'in front of her hand to show that it's producing the light aka a sphere or something magical. First look it appeared to be coming from off screen. But the light source wouldn't be nearly that intense off screen based on the surroundings. Also watch out for some general anatomy issues in areas like the hands and arms, the rest doesn't seem too bad a bit stocky which isn't a bad thing, just feels like the head and arms don't quite match up yet.

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    I agree with JFierce about the face, actually I believe the medium part of the face is too long and the forehead too short. The face is supposed to have a division in 3 thirds: top forehead-eyebrown, eyebrown-base of nose and base of nose-chin. That being said, it's the "ideal proportions" and nature shows a large amount of variations.
    About the green light I understand it comes from the lower part of the stair which reveals an issue: the back of the statue should be lightened too to make the image clearly readable.
    Other than that I like it.

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    Not bad. The green light is an issue because it's not affecting anything in the scene except the woman, and there's no particular sense of it being beamed at her. (It's clearly not coming from her as there are strong shadows on her.)

    Her proportions are a bit strange in that she looks very squat.

    I'm also bothered by the way the lamassu statue seems to be turning its head to watch her go by, as this doesn't seem to be intentional. I would make the statue bigger and have it gaze out on the level, above her head.

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    The proportions and perspective of the figure are quite wrong, especially (as others mentioned) the face.

    There is a bunch of issues with lighting and values here, too. The sunlight through the portal is somehow completely lighting the tops of the steps, the back of the character, and the side of the cherub statue - in the same time. It cannot work like that, because the portal has a rather small aperture and the sun's light rays are parallel. The green light is somehow strong enough to light the character's hand as brightly as the sun lights the jamb of the portal, and bright enough to make a falling shadow from the character's legs on the steps - yet it does not light her shin! It is also much weaker on the steps than on her palm, and nonexistent the inner wall around the portal and on the cherub's backside. Which has inexplicable white highlights from a source behind the viewer, but that light does not appear on anything else. There is a red light on the cherub's head which doesn't seem to appear anywhere else, too - but the ambience within the structure is clearly red, not green as one would expect with such an overpowering green source.

    In short, I recommend to spend more - much more - time on the preparatory stages. Do multiple sketches of the figure, the environment, the statue and steps, build perspective plots, plan the lighting. Figure out all the fundamentals before you begin to paint. And do some quick color and value tests before you paint the finished version.

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    Thank all of you for your critiques!
    I think this image needs some explanation, which at any rate don't want to be excuses but just requests for more advices.
    For what concerns the green light, It is coming from some kind of spell, originating in front of the woman's palm . i didn't want to add a visible light source, like a plasma sphere, but from your comments i understand it would have been much more readable. being it a point-like light source, its intensity is reducing sensibly with the distance, just like a candle.
    About the light from the "portal", i tried to model it in some parts like a contre-jour, in the remaining ones it would act like a window, or an open door.
    For the face, i have no excuses, it's just badly drawn! I just need more practice for that. a lot more.
    Dashinvaine, now that you told me that lamassu gives me the same feeling, if i traced some perspective lines it would be evident that it's not parallel with walls, and it should be larger, too!
    arenhaus, that light source should have been the reflected light on the lamassu from the wall, but I think i overstated it, and the colour is not what one would expect.
    I will spend more time on the preparatory stages, and try to follow perspective, and maybe try to use Blender to see how light behaves on masses, just doing a maquette. I have been too lazy to do it but now i understand it would be useful.

    Anyway i'm very satisfied from these critiques, i would be glad if someone analysed my "theories" as they could generate other horrors in the future. I will definitely post the WIPs of my next piece, in next future.

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    Quote Originally Posted by EmanueleSan View Post
    I think this image needs some explanation, which at any rate don't want to be excuses but just requests for more advices.
    That's where it fails, actually. A good illustration, ideally, should need as little explanation as possible. If you have to explain it in words, the image is not doing its job!

    For what concerns the green light, It is coming from some kind of spell, originating in front of the woman's palm . i didn't want to add a visible light source, like a plasma sphere, but from your comments i understand it would have been much more readable. being it a point-like light source, its intensity is reducing sensibly with the distance, just like a candle.
    I had actually considered that as a possibility. But the green light is very inconsistent with a point source in front of the palm, so I dismissed the idea.

    Regardless, light coming from an invisible source is a very confusing thing. We are all conditioned to know that light source is visible. So you ought to have been creative with it and use some indication of that, not necessarily a plasma sphere.

    About the light from the "portal", i tried to model it in some parts like a contre-jour, in the remaining ones it would act like a window, or an open door.
    For the face, i have no excuses, it's just badly drawn! I just need more practice for that. a lot more.
    You do need more practice just like everybody else, but there is no reason you could not have succeeded. You just need to use a better working method and do preparatory sketches before you start painting. And use reference.

    I will spend more time on the preparatory stages, and try to follow perspective, and maybe try to use Blender to see how light behaves on masses, just doing a maquette. I have been too lazy to do it but now i understand it would be useful.
    All these are good ideas.

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    I actually don't mind the proportion of the figure (all women are different and don't have to be model proportions), but I feel the neck is not quite centred on her shoulders, and starts too low down.


    I didn't think it was possible to be called an artist when you have nothing to say. It's like being a writer who publishes individual words as books and expects to be praised for it.
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    Its bloody ambitious! I admire your guts in taking on something this complex! And I think some areas like her legs are actually working really rather well. Keep pushing yourself hard like this, as well as studying the basics, and youll do great!

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    Last edited by Velocity Kendall; January 22nd, 2013 at 05:32 PM.
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    I agree with Black spot on her proportions, she might not conform to ~*Loomis chan's*~ bodily canon, but it's a realistic variance - she has pretty much the same proportions that my wife has. What's really bugging me is that the lamassu's eyes are out of alignment.

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