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Hey, guys. I'm in the process of launching a new webcomic www.blueabyss.com . Here are the first 3 pages. C&C appreciated.
UPDATE: I've added page 4, and mirrored pages 1 and 2 to make them flow better. Thanks for the feedback, guys. I'll be adding a new page every week.
UPDATE 2: page 5 added
Last edited by BurnComics; July 23rd, 2004 at 04:11 AM.
not another furry comic...ughhh
Ignore this man. Go to his user profile and then view all posts for such stellar replies as, "cool!...nipples!!! awsome" and "cool! looks like a duck and a peacock and a spider all put together".Originally Posted by phlem117
Anyway, it looks pretty good. The action and the coloring is very nice. The third page is a little weak compared to the first or second. Might I suggest some different font on the "Part man. Part cat. Part geek."?
Last edited by wassermelone; July 8th, 2004 at 11:55 PM.
I agree with Toaster. Different font, and the 3rd page doesn't quite grip me as much as the others. Also, it's a little strange having his eyes red in only one picture. Just a thought. Maybe make them glow blue, or show them change from red to blue. But it's looking good over all. Keep it up
Hey Burn, digging the work so far. Liking the explosion, color work, and figuration in the protagonist. The third page is a little static, probably because the orientation of the protagonist is parrallel to the bottom horizontal of the page. The cat eyes glowing red is a bit off to me, cat eyes usually would be a piercing green--due to the reflection off of the taptum in the back of their eyes if my biology serves me. But glowing red eyes are more fierce and dynamic.
Only real crit would be on your choice of narrative device, flashbacks are done to death. A comic staple, but done to death nonetheless. It will probably work here, and its not something you could change easily, just what I have been told by people who claim to know what they are doing (teachers and such) and my personal opinion. Keep up the good work though, I'd like to see where it goes.
"Full price for gum? That dog won't hunt Monsignor!"
hey, i was just kidding...its a good comic so far...
phlem117 - Believe it or not, the furry issue did come to mind when working on this. When I created that character years ago, I don't think the furry phenominon had gotten out of control. Anyway, I don't feel like ditching my character just because of the furry issue. He's not a furry
Toaster - What about the 3rd page makes it weaker than the first two? I totally agree on the font thing, as soon as I get some new font packages, it's gonna change. Thanks. By the way, you go to Ringling? I graduated from there in '99.
Phuzion - The color of the eyeglow is part of the story, it should (hopefully) make more sense by the 6th or 7th page. It kinda sucks not being able to update it as fast, because things like this won't make sense for now.
Upstart - That's a good point about the angle of the 3rd panel. That's something I'm going to try to work on in future pages. It's way too late for me to change the story, but also what plot device isn't used to death? I definitely don't pride myself on my writing, but I'll do what I can.
BlueMech - Well, technically he's a werecat, but there will be more on that later.
Thanks for the all the feedback, guys. It really helps.
As a fellow sequential artist (well, student right now) I would suggest that you flip the first page. This is something that I learned just last week in my Drawing for Sequential Art class. I was composing a cover and the professor pointed out that the comp lead the eye down and to the left, the problem is if it is a cover or even a page of a comic you want to reader to want to flip the page, hencforth the eye should be lead to the right. On the first page I look first at the body then at the explosion, because I am American and read left to right. I think this would be easy to change in PS and would suggest just keeping that in mind in the future.
Brom, Mignola, Charest, Miller..
Hey I like this a lot, I've been cooking up something myself but taking a different approach. I look forward to seeing your stuff develop. So does that 2nd page set the tone for your comic or what?
Last edited by Romus; July 11th, 2004 at 01:04 AM.
lol furrys nice sequential work. if yor char acter was shaved and looked human you would get more props but i really like the layouts and colors
LOTR, Halo, Heroes Sketchcards from Topps
Hale - thanks for pointing that out. When I started drawing this page, I couldn't decide if I wanted the explosion going to the left or the right. Ultimately, I decided to go with going to the left, but you were absolutely right. It reads much better this way. Thanks!
Romus - I love the look of your graphic novel. Can't wait to see more. Very unique.
dns2k - I refuse to let furries give cat people a bad name. Oh well, c'est la vie.
Update: Page 5 added.
off to comic con!