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Thread: Eviscerate Me

  1. #1
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    Eviscerate Me

    Howdy folks,
    I know this site is for the hardcore professionals and people who are masters in the craft. Despite that, I post here anyway, often to silence. I've chalked that to having mediocre art and, along with a few humbling critiques elsewhere, I find myself with nowhere to go but up. Therefore, I ask for any comments that can help me improve, become a professional, or not feel downright bad about my art. It can only help me and would be most appreciated. I've posted below some samples of my works but, to get a more extensive view of how I draw, you can also go to my sketchbook or comics here (http://conceptart.org/forums/showthr...it-Strangeness ) or here (http://conceptart.org/forums/showthr...arhead-Issue-5). Thank you kindly for your time.
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    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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  3. #2
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    Nice variety of stuff! Your linework is really great and confident. My only real critique is that i'd like to see some color on these.
    Here is my Tumblr
    Here is my Twitter
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  5. #3
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    You need to brush up on your perspective. The ground plane does not remain consistent in many of these.
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  7. #4
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    I also enjoy your use of line and balance of blacks in these. However you got some major anatomy problems, you can't even keep the proportions consistent in many of the figures, the first girl has some serious leg issues - I can't make sense where her knees are, one guy has major dwarf arms etc. The naked girl really clearly illustrates that you just generally have no clue how the rib cage and pelvis relate to one another and the lower part of her body seems two dimensional. I'd say study constructive anatomy, even getting a hang of the basic masses and landmarks of the body should be a major help to your drawing.
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  9. #5
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    Every figure you draw shows a solid sense of character, which is great and incredibly important. Otherwise, it's hard to generalize across the six pieces you posted--they all have various strong and weak points. You might do better to post one image at a time if you're looking for specific feedback.
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  11. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by flackattack View Post
    Nice variety of stuff! Your linework is really great and confident. My only real critique is that i'd like to see some color on these.
    Thanks! I think I have a distinct style that is fairly expressive when it comes to faces. I also love storytelling and conveying a sense of character. However, my works are fairly monochrome and I could use some proficiency with color. I appreciate the comment.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hexokinase View Post
    You need to brush up on your perspective. The ground plane does not remain consistent in many of these.
    Thanks! I'll work on my perspective.

    Quote Originally Posted by Suncut View Post
    I also enjoy your use of line and balance of blacks in these. However you got some major anatomy problems, you can't even keep the proportions consistent in many of the figures, the first girl has some serious leg issues - I can't make sense where her knees are, one guy has major dwarf arms etc. The naked girl really clearly illustrates that you just generally have no clue how the rib cage and pelvis relate to one another and the lower part of her body seems two dimensional. I'd say study constructive anatomy, even getting a hang of the basic masses and landmarks of the body should be a major help to your drawing.
    Thanks for the critique! I'll focus on those areas. To be perfectly honest, I find anatomy daunting. There are areas where, as you've noted, I have serious flaws and legs are one of them, as well as placement of the chest and pelvis areas. Similarly, I struggle with foreshortened limbs. I'm going to try a more rigorous approach to anatomy but I find my brain struggling with it. I'm not sure it should be this hard.

    Quote Originally Posted by Giacomo View Post
    Every figure you draw shows a solid sense of character, which is great and incredibly important. Otherwise, it's hard to generalize across the six pieces you posted--they all have various strong and weak points. You might do better to post one image at a time if you're looking for specific feedback.
    Thanks! I love telling stories, so I'm glad the characters come through so strongly. I've duly noted your comment and will, from now forward, post the images in a singular fashion.

    Here's a sample of my comic work. I'd love to know what people think.
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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  12. #7
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    The drawing on your comic is totally pro-level. No worries there, although that cowboy's holding his bottle at a pretty Cubistic angle.

    Regarding the comic: The sketch you posted earlier of the girl on the runway in a bikini and crash helmet is infinitely more engaging than that comic page, because looking at it, I instantly want to know why Ms. Bikini/Helmet is in that situation and how she got there. I basically made the following comment about "Miss Doomsday" a year or two ago, and I'll make it again: Your use of ultra-stereotyped characters really puts me off wanting to actually read the story (even, in this case, after seeing only one page...I feel like I've seen "Introspective Shy Girl" and "Gregarious Bubbly Friend Who Tries To Draw Introspective Shy Girl Out Of Her Shell" about a zillion times already in comics, TV, and movies.) There's a lot to be said for being able to indicate those "types" with as much ease as you do, but if you want my advice, I'd say: "Show your characters doing stuff on every page that's unique and interesting, in situations that are unique and interesting."

    Once again, just my two a**hole cents.
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  14. #8
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    Good technique, good expressiveness, good sense of character, good composition (mostly). Small linework lapses here and there, with "tired" and "hairy" lines, but mostly the linework is good.

    To get further, I'd recommend to focus on solidity of drawing. Your finishing technique is ahead of your construction skill; that's not an uncommon thing, actually. So you should spend a little more time building the form before you finish. Anatomy and perspective studies would do you good; focus on making a solid drawing in pencil without shading and without inking.

    Another thing that could be improved is the value composition. Your foregrounds and backgrounds tend to get the same level of detail, which makes them run together and impact the clarity of the drawing. Practice ways to make background recede and foreground stand out; in comics that's even more important than in single images. Use lighter line, shading, level of detail, etc. to separate the fore from the back.

    Use bolder lighting. You are very shy of making clear falling shadows, using black, using contrast or directional light. Look at what Mignola does; his detail level is much less intricate than yours, but his use of line with solid black make his work stand out much more than yours. If you can make a panel work with just white, black, and gray in it - with no line - then it will work with more shading and more line too.
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  16. #9
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    One thing i noticed especially in the comic page you posted is that the line weight is a bit inconsistent, and this makes the page somewhat flat and uneven. This is especially noticeable in the first panel, where the lines of the streetlight in the background are almost as thick as those detailing her facial features. Also, since the tree on her right is sort of outlined in white, whereas she's not, against the black background it stands out more than she does. This is the kind of think that one should be careful of when working on a comic. What i'm trying to say is that without differentiating the thickness of the lines when you're inking, especially in busy pages like the one you posted, the characters tend to not stand out and become less visible among the crowd, since there's nothing in the inking bringing them to focus.
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  18. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giacomo View Post
    The drawing on your comic is totally pro-level. No worries there, although that cowboy's holding his bottle at a pretty Cubistic angle.

    Regarding the comic: The sketch you posted earlier of the girl on the runway in a bikini and crash helmet is infinitely more engaging than that comic page, because looking at it, I instantly want to know why Ms. Bikini/Helmet is in that situation and how she got there. I basically made the following comment about "Miss Doomsday" a year or two ago, and I'll make it again: Your use of ultra-stereotyped characters really puts me off wanting to actually read the story (even, in this case, after seeing only one page...I feel like I've seen "Introspective Shy Girl" and "Gregarious Bubbly Friend Who Tries To Draw Introspective Shy Girl Out Of Her Shell" about a zillion times already in comics, TV, and movies.) There's a lot to be said for being able to indicate those "types" with as much ease as you do, but if you want my advice, I'd say: "Show your characters doing stuff on every page that's unique and interesting, in situations that are unique and interesting."

    Once again, just my two a**hole cents.
    I appreciate your honest opinion (and thanks with the compliments regarding the comic page). I've actually kept your comment in mind, believe it or not, for quite some time now. I've been working on a story where the character is more relatable and interesting. I think that was one of the problems with "Miss Doomsday". The helmet girl is part of a story that's sort of in the pre-production stage. I'm working on hammering out the story but, in the meantime, I've been working on the design as seen above. As with many of my stories, it's a bit of a strange one but uses a lot of the humor and drama I like to mix into my stories. It's about a girl who's immortal but it turns out that it's not what it's cracked up to be.

    Quote Originally Posted by arenhaus View Post
    Good technique, good expressiveness, good sense of character, good composition (mostly). Small linework lapses here and there, with "tired" and "hairy" lines, but mostly the linework is good.

    To get further, I'd recommend to focus on solidity of drawing. Your finishing technique is ahead of your construction skill; that's not an uncommon thing, actually. So you should spend a little more time building the form before you finish. Anatomy and perspective studies would do you good; focus on making a solid drawing in pencil without shading and without inking.

    Another thing that could be improved is the value composition. Your foregrounds and backgrounds tend to get the same level of detail, which makes them run together and impact the clarity of the drawing. Practice ways to make background recede and foreground stand out; in comics that's even more important than in single images. Use lighter line, shading, level of detail, etc. to separate the fore from the back.

    Use bolder lighting. You are very shy of making clear falling shadows, using black, using contrast or directional light. Look at what Mignola does; his detail level is much less intricate than yours, but his use of line with solid black make his work stand out much more than yours. If you can make a panel work with just white, black, and gray in it - with no line - then it will work with more shading and more line too.
    Thank you so much for the critique. I do believe you hit the nail right on the head. My approach with the background, thus far, has been to emphasize detail over depth, which is not how the world works. As you say, depth is created by varying linework, lighting, and detail. This is the approach I will do from now on.

    I also have a habit of not providing enough emphasis on the building stage of the drawings and focus more on the finished product. It's a bad habit of mine and one I'm going to work on fixing. Your comment has been very enlightening to me.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ravatta View Post
    One thing i noticed especially in the comic page you posted is that the line weight is a bit inconsistent, and this makes the page somewhat flat and uneven. This is especially noticeable in the first panel, where the lines of the streetlight in the background are almost as thick as those detailing her facial features. Also, since the tree on her right is sort of outlined in white, whereas she's not, against the black background it stands out more than she does. This is the kind of think that one should be careful of when working on a comic. What i'm trying to say is that without differentiating the thickness of the lines when you're inking, especially in busy pages like the one you posted, the characters tend to not stand out and become less visible among the crowd, since there's nothing in the inking bringing them to focus.
    Those are very solid points. More emphasis on what's important and less emphasis on detail. I appreciate the comment.

    Here's a fun little sketch I did. My two loves are cartooning and drawing the female sex. It's my weak spot.
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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  20. #11
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    I'm working on producing backgrounds with more depth than previously. Here's an example in a commission I'm working on:
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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  21. #12
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    Another sketch from the series:
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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  22. #13
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    I've been working on understanding rib cages and here's another attempt. I'm still working on perfecting it, along with arms, but any thoughts would be welcome.
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Visit my just a tad bit strange sketchbook: http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=224247

    My comic "Miss Doomsday" (here on CA): http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=223608

    My comic "Opey the Warhead" (also here on CA):
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=130842
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