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Im getting ready to go peddle my wares at the San Diego Comic-con and I am trying to get as many crits as possible. So here is the first page of my sample, it features a battle between the British superhero team Excalibur and the dimension hopping Technet. CnC if you please.
Looks like a nice first page. I have been to Comic-con for the past 8 years. I started off showing my work hoping to get a start, and now work as a professional for Heavy Metal Magazine ... just so you know where this is coming from.
You've got good action shots, perspective, buildings, points of interest, and a lot of characters ... all a great place to start. You are ahead of many of the other people who will be showing work. The one thing that I would say that this page is lacking is street life. There are no cars, pedestrians, parking meters, trash cans, and all that little crap that help completes it. Not having simple things like that can hurt you. Just something to keep in mind for future pages. I hope that helps. Good luck in SD!
I like but the page to me seems just a little silent and static. Don't get me wrong... the poses are certainly dynamic but the panels lack movement. Take the first panel for example.. I can see that the closest guy has just been king-hit by the guy in the middleground but that's going by pose alone... there isn't anything particularly linking the two. Like N8 said I think busying it up with street life would help and adding in a few movement lines would most definitely complete things.
N8 and someguy...
Thanks for the crits, the sterile background/lack of street life seems to be a reocurring crit, so it will be fixed for sure. Thanks for the kind words and hopefully I will be able put them to good use in San Diego.
Peace and thanks, thanks and peace!
N8 & Someguy gave some great feedback. All I would add would be to watch the perspective. Not so much the stylized curved views but the distances betwen object & characters do not seem consistant. Terrific use of form & shading. A few tweaks here & there and you will be golden
looks good to me, I didn't notice the lack of street extras till I saw N8's post but looking at it now I would have to agree with that crit. Really great job with the pose of the guy getting punched, overall I think this is a great page. Two extremely small crits, first the perspective on the girl flying towards us on the right seems a little extreme on her foot. Right now her foot is actually smaller than the foot of the girl running in the B/G. Only other thing I saw was on the right hand of the guy getting smacked out of panel his pointer finger looks a little odd. Definitely not deal breakers, and I am being overly critical most likely, but I figured since you were looking for crits may as well mention them.
Great work, good luck in San Diego!
Hey, glad to see someone else is going to Comic Con. What's your name? Maybe I could top by and check out your work.
very nice! for the first panel i would loved to have seen a bolder line around captain britain to pop him out more. his head seems to get lost in the second panel, and it'll seperate him more pushing distance between him and the bad guys.
2nd panel- kitty pryde and nightcrawler are noticeable, but not too clearly though. maybe cast a shadow on their backs to make it seem like there are objects off panel (i.e. buildings, traffic light, stop signs etc.) and by doing this it'll force the focus more on captain britain's impact.
the plus side is your anatomy is off the hook, and you set up your panels really well. very exciting stuff here.
it's not if you can't do it, but it's if you want to
Wowee, thanks everyone.
Thanks so much for all of the input twice over!!! I am so excited that everyone is still lending me an objective eye! I am working on the revised first page as we "speak," I hope it meets everyone standards I think that it is probably my best pages ever and it is thanks to everyone's help. I can hardly wait to post.
PS-Cheeks-74 you are far too kind, I picked up your work on Venom, which was great to see you getting work, I can hardly wait for more!
PS- Sean I will just be floating around the con, no booth or anything, so I don't know how I am going to organize meeting anyone from forums, any ideas?
my pleasure.... please... let's not say venom too loud... haha i felt like it wasn't me 110% due to the deadline and it being my first book. i am working on a 4 page backstory for image comics. i am drawing and coloring it. i am so stoked... i have the time to make it really pop the way i want too.
can't wait to see your neew revision of the page! keep up the awesome work!
it's not if you can't do it, but it's if you want to
Oh, I thought you might be listed under the professionals attending. It's still up in the air whether I can go or not, but hopefully I can make it all three or four days. That would be cool to see someone from the forums, though.Originally Posted by greenlantern
As far as your artwork goes, I can't critique any more than what was already said, but I do like your style alot and hope to see more from you.
nice! i like the details...
DNA Daily Sketchbook
Give Me A Place To Stand And I Will Move The Earth
Very nice! I like the destroyed street at the last panel.
I love the page, but the last panel is just awesome! Great job!!
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