Art: Action Analysis
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    Action Analysis

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5qhP5ql1gY


    I posted this last year but that was when there was no animation thread! Completed December 2011. Enjoy. For those interested, I'm working on my first solo film, follow my blog below for updates.

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    Hi there! Nice little exercise, I'm sorry I wasn't around to catch this when it was hot off the press. Nice color palette and background.

    I have a small pile of notes, take 'em or leave 'em (all frame numbers are relative to the download video):

    -> His front paw during the anticipation for the jump is boiling around. It doesn't seem to plant firmly like the back feet.
    -> Staging is overall very nice, but I might have made the plum more saturated to help it stand out more.
    -> You need 1 or 2 breakdowns to ease out of 53f
    -> I get what you're trying to do with the hips during the anticipation, but it's popping pretty hard on 69f and especially 63f. A one or two frame ease-out of these drawings should do it.
    -> I would have a bit more of a moving hold around 78f (as if he's moving through this pose), it would help separate the anticipation and the leap better.
    -> 82f doesn't make sense to me as a drawing. I would have him just barely starting the leap (5-10%) here. Also his tail is awkwardly reversing shape between this and the next frame.
    -> This one doesn't really matter because it looks fine to me in motion, but the smear at 85f is slightly shorter than the two on either side. In fact, if you made the smear on 83f slightly longer (personal taste) you could just cut 85f altogether.
    -> At the top of the first branch arc, he slows and pivots around a single point in space from 92f-95f before going on and completing the arc. It looks odd broken up like that. You should be easing into your key around 102f through this part.
    -> The branch flips sides 101f-102f. It's distracting, because it's the fastest thing moving in a slow part of the shot. Stuff like this happens where you have to flip things around for the sake of flow or staging, but always try to do it in the middle of a fast move. I would have put it somewhere around 90f.
    -> 134f-141f is imo the weakest part of the shot. Consider where he just was: If I believe his weight is swinging freely, then his body and tail should be pointing down like an extension of the branch.
    -> 148f, when he hits the tree, you see a flash of white belly. I understand why you drew it this way, and you absolutely should have a squash frame here, but it should be a pose that doesn't flash when colored in.
    -> His front screen-right paw flashes over to his body silhouette on 179f. I would have given it one or two more frames of ease.
    -> The ear twitch at the end is cute, but I'm not sure what it's there for. If it's meant to be overlap, it's too big and noisy. If it's meant as a deliberate "oh me" kind of gesture, it's fighting too much with his ease into the final pose, and should be later.

    As a side note... love that "melt" off the tree trunk, and his bunch up at the bottom. Feels nice. Looking forward to seeing more from you.

    Last edited by Melete; October 21st, 2012 at 07:05 PM.
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    Wooooaaah thanks!! Not a single one of my profs gave me this much feedback. Right on man!! You got a blog?

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    Haha, no. Always seems like I'm too busy to make a website. But feel free to post more work in the future, I'll do some draw-overs next time.

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    iven is offline Animator/ Eco-artist/ Caricaturist Level 6 Gladiator: Provocator
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    I just love it, but this feedback was very precize, I will check out your Sketchbook, where did
    you study !?

    Sketchbook - . Showreal - . Commission me - .

    *critique* advice* help full links, is appreciated*



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    If you want to learn animation, I recommend Calarts, Sheridan, VFS, Ringling, The Animation Workshop, iAnimate, Animation Mentor, Pixar's animation program, and Gobelins (if you're a prodigy/professional and know French). A good rule of thumb for improving after school is always work in a studio that does work better than what you can currently do - quality commercial houses or training programs in VFX studios. Obviously not all of us can go to Dreamworks or Disney straight out, so pick a couple of stepping-stone studios to develop your craft. I have seen a lot of people flame out after school by going to the first place that will hire them, producing sub-quality work that they can't use on demo reels, and stay there for years and years. If you have enough money not to starve, I think it's a much better use of time to stay unemployed and work on your own stuff to aim higher.

    Out of curiosity Sprog... Was Nancy Beiman your teacher for this exercise?

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    Yep I went to Sheridan, Iven. Nancy teaches story at Sheridan, not animation. Besides, this was pretty much a self directed project with David Quesnelle as the 'mentor'. Some of us went to Nancy for advice...I did not. What about you Melete, if I were to guess I would say that you're in the industry. Where are you working? I'd say theres probably 2-3 percent if not less that will be going to the big studios after graduation for animation. Vis dev maybe the same percentage.

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    Ah, didn't know Nancy was in story exclusively these days. Guess I should have figured that out from her books.

    I've been at a few major studios so far (VFX and feature animation), but I'm between contracts right now. I definitely did not go to a Dreamworks/Disney after graduation... I started the job search during a large downturn in the industry and it was tough to break in. I spent a year unemployed and doing my own stuff before breaking into a VFX house and working up from there. As far as an A-list studio immediately after graduation, I think the 2-3 percent may be an exaggeration. Even amazingly talented people may not land on top for their first gig - I can think of a few who are supervisors on features now who were let go from small time game studios back when they were starting out. There is an element of luck and timing even for the best among us.

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  11. #9
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    iven is offline Animator/ Eco-artist/ Caricaturist Level 6 Gladiator: Provocator
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    Thanks for the FEEDBACk I am just doing exactly that, because no school really wants mee.
    I have to much my own style, applying to Sheridan pushed my drawing skills but, I figured
    I might wouldn't like it there anyway. I am interested in all classical animation styles, I love the
    children animation llike cut out animation.

    Sketchbook - . Showreal - . Commission me - .

    *critique* advice* help full links, is appreciated*



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