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I woke up late today (about 3pm her time) and I got a missed call at about 7:30am (Mytime). I tried calling the whole day and I could not get through. I was wondering if she hates me now because I have not called and blah blah blah. It's really taking most of my will not to get impatient and think about bad things (i.e. does she hate me/will we get back together) than to just calm down and try to get myself back together. It is also double hard because I REALLY thought this was going to be it and we would get married and i could finally feel loved and accepted and... stuff. Anyway, I will definitely ask for space and accept the guilt trip that will come with it.
Advice that I am getting suggests that I should just let go and "be happy on my own, right now" as you said. I will try to let go but my over positive side comes in and says: "No! You should be ready for when she comes back to you!" Ugh. I will be happy by myself.
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