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  1. #1
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    Requesting Critique/Feedback

    I`d love to hear some feedback on this. Anything at all, please!

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  3. #2
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    What is she doing? That pose is pretty weird, considering she's not apparently actually moving (like dancing or doing magics or something like where I could see her hand pose be coming from), she and the slightly unreferenced looking bird are both looking off camera, the folds on the dress don't really make sense like I can see what you're trying with the cloth folds that start from her boobs but it doesn't look natural at all and just look like her nipples are creating red strings or something (and red looks like it's part of her skin, not sure if that was deliberate) and the repeating leaf brush is pretty painfully visible since it's used in almost every single leaf bush. Also there's bunch of other, more fundamental problems (lighting, anatomy etc) but I'm more interested on what she's supposed to be doing?
    There's the "this character is alone in the woods but is posing like she's in a photo shoot and asked to pose dramatically" vibe.

    Also I'm not sure exactly what way her arm is supposed to be.. Is her elbow pointing towards ground or sky?

    Last edited by TinyBird; July 1st, 2012 at 01:07 PM.
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  5. #3
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    Thanks for the critique TinyBird! That was fast
    I don't really have answers to your questions about what she's actually doing besides "some sort of magic poses" which is quite weak, definitely.
    While the crow does come from photographic references, I suppose I lacked the focus I should have brought to the entire image. I only made one leaf brush, I slacked on the drapery, and left her arm a confusing silhouette (her elbow points down).
    I appreciate the reply. Here are several major issues I'll try to resolve with my next illustration.

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  6. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Twisted Synapses View Post
    I don't really have answers to your questions about what she's actually doing besides "some sort of magic poses" which is quite weak, definitely.
    While the crow does come from photographic references, I suppose I lacked the focus I should have brought to the entire image. I only made one leaf brush, I slacked on the drapery, and left her arm a confusing silhouette (her elbow points down).
    Did you do many thumbnails for the image before really starting?
    Also for the crow, this tutorial might be helpful, as it shows how the bird wings overlap when folded: http://theantimonyelement.deviantart...rial-150844565 and yeah I really thought that her arm was totally twisted around with elbow up (seeing how the clothes seemed very skintight but I couldn't see the Brachioradialis muscle, which made the pose even weirder.

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  8. #5
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    I totally skipped the thumbnail process too. I had something in my head and it just sort of shaped itself out of that (detrimentally).
    That's a great tutorial.
    Much obliged, sir.

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  9. #6
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    I like the mood and everything but you need to reference everything. If you want to improve, don't keep doing what you already know...or what you think you know. Get ref and do it right. The bird is probly the best thing here maybe because its the only thing you referenced; the pose, drapery, and forest need ref the most.

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  11. #7
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    A huge problem with your image is that you are ignoring your own light source. By ignoring this, your image is lacking depth and drama. I did a rough paint-over to show how you can use these elements to improve your image.

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    SUPER ROBOT BUBBLE POP!
    Give it a try. It's a fun, fast paced action game, and, best of all... it's free!

    https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/supe...860197713?mt=8

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  13. #8
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    Artfix - Thanks for the advice! I've got a hard drive packed with references I just don't use enough. Draperies, anatomy etc.

    keith v - That looks fantastic! This was incredibly helpful. As soon as I have some time later I'm going to go back over this and see if I can't improve my lighting.

    I've gotten a lot of insight on how to improve. Thanks everyone who responded, your advice has been indispensable. I really appreciate it.

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  14. #9
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    Thanks again everyone for your advice. I won't forget any of it any time soon. Here's what's happening so far.
    I did some quick studies of bird feathers and wings and tried to fix all the inaccuracies with the crow (the original photo reference was dark so the feathers weren't well defined), changed her clothes a bit to clear up a little (definitely not all) confusion, changed the direction of her gaze to make a little less disjointed from the crow, and ran with the lighting advice. The anatomy and environment I think I may put off until my next painting, but these are now glaring errors to me that hopefully won't be repeated. It's rough, but I need to approach these issues before I worry too much about polish I think.
    I'm still taking any pointers I can get. Feel free to add anything. Always appreciated.

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