New thumbs, same question: Does it read?

View testimonialsView Artwork
Results 1 to 13 of 13
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0

    New thumbs, same question: Does it read?

    "Show, don't tell."

    I have a few compositions I've been working on, and I'd like to ask what you see in them, what do they read as? I've worked on them kind of in isolation and I think I've gone blind as to if the values and subject matter work or not.

    So, I'm asking crits on readability, composition, values and scale and anything else you can think of. I'm trying to get the initial values and composition right so I can start rendering.

    EDIT: Added thumbs as suggested by JeffX99.

    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by Kauil; June 28th, 2012 at 08:53 AM.
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  


  2. Hide this ad by registering as a member
  3. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    HELLsinki, Finland
    Posts
    4,860
    Thanks
    345
    Thanked 2,689 Times in 1,646 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    I see a tornado in a plain that has a small river, a headless mecha in ice (like there's the upper arm, other shoulder's armor spike and chest/ab armor plates) and a giant Faberge egg of ice. Or Avatar the Last Airbender movie fanart. Honestly said the two first are kinda abstract that to me it's really hard to get a clear reading of them.

    "I eat comics and poop stylization"
    Comic!
    Sketchbook (Critiques, no compliments please.)
    Tumblr
    Website
    Livejournal
    DeviantArt
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to TinyBird For This Useful Post:


  5. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Thanks for the feedback... I shall continue with these. Somehow I find it really difficult to detach myself from my vision/idea, and I just see what I think I see instead of actually letting my eyes read the information... :L

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  6. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    5,234
    Thanks
    3,512
    Thanked 4,906 Times in 2,547 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    A gorge with a bridge - but the far canyon walls don't continue down into the gorge

    No idea - a dark rock outcropping on side of a snowy mountain

    A big thing coming up out of a snowy plain

    To me each one is missing two critical aspects of environment - an interesting, dynamic point of view/composition and a feeling of natural, outdoor light. I would work on comnposition and a sense of light.

    What would Caravaggio do?
    _________________________

    Portfolio
    Plein Air
    Digital
    Still Life
    Sight Measuring
    Fundamentals
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to JeffX99 For This Useful Post:


  8. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Colored and refined a bit... how is it reading now?

    Attached Images Attached Images
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  9. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    5,234
    Thanks
    3,512
    Thanked 4,906 Times in 2,547 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    The same problems...only now with added color issues.

    Maybe this will help...what direction is the light from? Why is there a single cast shadow indicated on the right...yet the left cliff face and mountain wall are darker than the right?

    Why does the distant canyon end at the plateau like it is sitting on top of the ground?

    Why are the cliffs green?

    Work out your lighting and composition first...the rest is easy.

    Last edited by JeffX99; June 25th, 2012 at 04:44 PM.
    What would Caravaggio do?
    _________________________

    Portfolio
    Plein Air
    Digital
    Still Life
    Sight Measuring
    Fundamentals
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to JeffX99 For This Useful Post:


  11. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Thanks for taking the time to crit, JeffX99.

    My thinking with this wasn't the best. Initially I thought the mountain faces would be sort of bathing in light, with a part of the middleground (the path) also being cast in light, and the foreground in the shadow. The I somehow thought that the mountains that were below the path would somehow be a lot darker than the higher parts, which didnt make sense.

    My light is coming from upper right, as shown by the backlit/sidelit green forms (grassy rocks?). But I lost that in several points, like with the cast shadow, and the cliff faces.

    Is there any uniform direction one should take when figuring out light and shadow. One approach that sort of makes sense to me would be to first put in local colors. This way it would be easier to put in the forms first and then figure out your lighting direction. But then you only have silhouettes to work with, and where there would be shadow separation (like where the cliff faces show form through shadow).

    I might build this from scratch, thinking what I want to tell with it. It sort of evolved as I went on, which probably partly attributes to my incoherent thinking throughout the piece.

    I'm a bit confused with what I should do first. Currently I'm trying to think of light direction, atmospheric perspective, and form design all at once. Is this correct? Is there a way to simplify this?

    EDIT: Oh, I guess DRAWING the scene first would be the way to simplify and to convey form before going to value and light.

    As for composition, I thought it was one of my strong points. Do you have any suggestions for improving my compositions?

    Last edited by Kauil; June 25th, 2012 at 08:35 PM.
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  12. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    5,234
    Thanks
    3,512
    Thanked 4,906 Times in 2,547 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Sure...lots of questions but they're the right ones.

    Yes you should really start the process with thumbnail sketches. In the thumbnails shoot for exploring two things: 1) copmposition and 2) light and shadow. Keep it all big simple shapes with a strong indication of the direction and altitude of the light/sun. Keep your thumbnails the size of a large postage stamp.

    Yeah, you can think of form, light and atmospheric perspective (which isn't that big of a deal - mainly just value shifts and a little color shift, loss of detail, etc.) all together when thumbnailing.

    No on the local color approach to defining light - light is defined by value, not color. The amount, intensity, direction of the light affects local color but is mainly defined by value, planes, cast shadow and lastly form shadow (which mainly defines the planes and volume of form).

    So yeah, take the bridge/chasm idea and redevelop it with a good process.

    Gurney's book "Imaginitve Realism" would be a great asset. For composition and environment I also recommend "Drawing Scenery: Landscapes and Seascapes" by Jack Hamm. It isn't flashy but it gets right down to it.

    Good luck - post some thumbnails when you get them!

    What would Caravaggio do?
    _________________________

    Portfolio
    Plein Air
    Digital
    Still Life
    Sight Measuring
    Fundamentals
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  13. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to JeffX99 For This Useful Post:


  14. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Okay.. here's five thumbs. I did more, but these are the ones I've fleshed out so far. Some time went to figuring out a process for these.

    I started with pencil to make a rough line art, then did lines again in photoshop, and set the line layer on multiply. Then I just thought how I wanted the lighting to be, and started adding values with the airbrush, erasin with the hard round to create hard edges.

    How well do these read?

    Attached Images Attached Images
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  15. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Bergen, Norway
    Posts
    603
    Thanks
    286
    Thanked 428 Times in 221 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Number 3 has nice depth and number 4 has some nice dramatic lighting. One of those two would definitely be worth exploring further.

    In the first one the large rock wall on the left seems very flat because it is so square and has te very thin black shadow on the right side wich indicates it is only a few meters thick.
    The second one lacks hard edges to make it interesting. The last one looks a bit confusing, like an escher illusion or something. Maybe it could be interesting, but the light doesn't read so well.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  16. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    163
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 52 Times in 47 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Thanks so much for the feedback, Obstfelder! I agree with you on everything.

    I'm gonna make a few more fleshed out thumbs, then decide what to work on.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  17. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Arizona
    Posts
    1,540
    Thanks
    129
    Thanked 885 Times in 593 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    I like #4 because it has the most "fantasy-dramatic lighting". It has that light hitting right where u want it for a focal point.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  18. #13
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Hudson River valley, NY
    Posts
    16,212
    Thanks
    4,879
    Thanked 16,678 Times in 5,021 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    #4 by a mile. It's the only one with anything approaching believable space and light.


    Tristan Elwell
    **Finished Work Thread **Process Thread **Edges Tutorial

    Crash Course for Artists, Illustrators, and Cartoonists, NYC, the 2013 Edition!

    "Work is more fun than fun."
    -John Cale

    "Art is supposed to punch you in the brain, and it's supposed to stay punched."
    -Marc Maron
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

Members who have read this thread: 0

There are no members to list at the moment.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
  • 424,149 Artists
  • 3,599,276 Artist Posts
  • 32,941 Sketchbooks
  • 54 New Art Jobs
Art Workshop Discount Inside
Register

Developed Actively by vBSocial.com
The Art Department
SpringOfSea's Sketchbook