WIP needs help - FINISHED March 29, 2013
 
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  1. #1
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    WIP needs help - FINISHED March 29, 2013

    FINISHED! - Thank you all who took their time to give me handy pointers. The finished image is here in this post.

    Hi!

    I'm working on a few illustrations for a project and I'm thinking I could use some pointers. The work is heavily WIP and I'd probably like to take it a long way (also the final things going to be color, not b&w)

    I want it to be a static scene, a bar, with three characters in it. The middle one's the main dude and the two on the sides as the "sidekicks" or just secondary. I hit a wall with tonality here - trying to work the middle guys face, but I keep making a mess of it.

    I welcome any and all tips 'n pointers

    Cheers!

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    Last edited by Gaspard; March 28th, 2013 at 07:47 PM.
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  3. #2
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    Render the face on left guy, render the front guy's left hand, and smooth out the lighting on the bald guy. Dude, looks solid....

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  4. #3
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    I'm not really getting that the guy in the middle is the boss. He's center, but I don't otherwise see any sign of authority. The lackey to our left is better dressed, and the guy on our right is bigger. Maybe give the leader a distinctive scar, or some dog tags, or something similar to tell the viewer that there's something more to this guy. It might also help to hear how this illustration relates to the others in the project.

    Lighting looks good to me. Might try illuminating the boss's face with a more subtle secondary light, though I'm not sure from what source.

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  5. #4
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    your work certainly is looking great, but it also tells a story (which i like). building on from the last statement, maybe consider having a secondary light source in the following way: have the center "leader" character change positions of hands by having him lighting a cigarette with hands cupped around the flame. this illuminate just his face and no others. secondly, i feel that his hands on the bar table and on the drink don't make him look as imposing....in fact when your picture caught my eye, i thought it was a scene where the centre character was being approached by rivals from behind. These are just my suggestions though. Again, your work looks fantastic

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  6. #5
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    Thanks, for the feedback guys! I apologize for my long absence. It is not that I don't care about your feedback - the opposite, most assuredly - but my tablet broke down and I haven't been able to replace it
    I have a replacement solution for now until I get a new one.

    StaticX - Haha! I wish it were that easy I want this to be a solid illustration, when I'm done. I'm sure it'll take me a while as I haven't worked with such a picture before, nor on anything with such lighting.

    Grunler - thanks for the critique! This is going to be an end slide for a game (modification) illustrating the outcome of some of the actions the player can make during a play through. Formyself I want it to be a finished and detailed illustration as well. So I can say that I can pull something like this off!

    The (short) story is as follows: The middle guy, a local gangbanger named A. has had a beef with the local barkeeper and owner Snake. This scene illustrates the outcome where this guy turns out triumphant. As a side note: A. guy is the bad guy, also the only son of a local mobster, a quasi-major character in the game. Keywords for the A. character are "young, cocky, long hair, leather jacket". The other guys are his lackeys. I have some more ideas on how I want to change their costumes, but I think I got A.'s pose to pretty much what I want to go for.

    oo0oo - again, thank you! Yeah, I know what you mean, but I want to try and make the leaning pose work. I lightened all the darks up quite a bit, so now his face is more visible.

    So, I thought long and hard about the critique I got from you guys and went over the characters' costumes as well as made slight modifications to the poses. Also - I enlarged the composition a little because it felt very cramped in the previous version.
    I lightened up the whole composition and will try to keep the purest blacks only for some details.

    So now that I got back to it I took several steps back, shot some reference photos and found reference material on the web, played around with things and now I'm going to go forward with this:

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    Ugh, it's 2 AM and I'm super tired. I hope to keep working on this tomorrow. MOAR critique iz always welcome!

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  8. #6
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    I really liked the moody lighting on the first version. On the second one, it seems to have lost much of its effect. The hands, the zipper or white lace and the buttons on the front guy's coat look too light, and I don't understand what's causing the highlights on the nose and chin. By the placement of the light, there should be more of a highlight on the front guy's right shoulder and less on the hair. I'd also darken the picture a bit from the bottom. The stool on the left and the cash register start to be so detailed that they steal the attention a bit. Anyway, I like the composition, how you detailed the front guy's face and the believability of the environment! Hope you'll add back the glow on the lamp, it added a nice feel of smoke.

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  9. #7
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    HAPPY NEW YEAR! There.

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    smuli - !!!huh, I received an e-mail notification of your post a month later, today. What's up with that?
    Thanks for the critique. I agree with you about the lighting and I'll try to get back some of that moodyness with color, as explained below, too. I got your other points as well and I'll try to keep 'em in mind as I (slowly) progress. Cheers!

    I don't have so much time to work on this too often and this time got around to it again just a few days ago - hence the laggy progress. Haha - in the end it'll be my loooongest digital work ever!
    Working without color for so long started to annoy me (it's my first time doing it this way) and just plain modeling the b&w didn't seem rewarding enough, so I fast forwarded a little and added color. It all needs tweaking tonally, but I like the direction it's going color wise, that'll help me with the smoky lighting too I think? Right? Right?
    Again, thanks for your critiques all of you guys! And thanks for bearing with me. I like this piece and will finish it no matter what. I hope the going will get easier as more and more things click into place for me

    Last edited by Gaspard; January 3rd, 2013 at 03:36 AM.
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    Name:  NCR15_bad_ending_CA.jpg
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    woop woop. slow, but steady. I'm almost done with modeling the characters, I'll tinker a bit with their gear and clothing and then I'll try to return to the smoky light the very first sketch/version had. oh. and the bar... but that should be fairly straightforward now that the biggest elements are in place

    any tips, thoughts, ideas? I'll be ever ! jawohl!

    as ever, nervously yours,

    k.

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  11. #9
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    I really like it. Very detailed and it's looking pretty solid so far. It's not perfect, especially the folds on the sleeves of the leather jacket on the guy in the middle, and the bottles in the background could be a little less skewed (but maybe that's what you were going for).

    The boss character also looks a little stiff, almost robotic. Good job so far though.

    My Sketchbook: Criticisms and Feedback needed


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  13. #10
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    Thanks for an honest feedback .) Yeah I will still work on modeling the dudes' clothes, including the leather jacket and the stuff in trhe background as well. i'll keep you posted as I progress!

    Cheers

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  14. #11
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    Finished at last!

    Well - I've finally finished it. A big thanks to everybody for a bunch of critique!

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