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  1. #27
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    Okay another update. And thanks again for all the comments, its tough sometimes but its helpful, especially when I look back at where i started to where I am now with it.

    Most of the work was done on the face, I widened her mouth a bit too and simplified the structures around it. I also adjusted the jaw on the left which was really off. I tried the hand thing but nothing made me happy so I am keeping it out.

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  3. #28
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    I'm afraid you haven't read Tinybird's redline right. You don't need to copy the lines, of course; try to understand what he was trying to show you. For example, he tweaked the location of the far eye, restructured the nose, repositioned the ear, corrected the perspective on the mouth and gave your girl a chin. You don't seem to have followed any of these things, but instead just tweaked the lines in your drawing to be somewhat closer to his lines.

    I recommend studies in drawing of a human head structurally.

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  4. #29
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    I actually did take a lot of TinyBird's suggestions and applied them and no I didn't trace it specifically. If you compare where I started at the top and where i ended its much close to what TinyBird was describing. I also restructured the nose, completely redesigned the far eye and lowered the ear and just now i widened her face changed the mouth.

    Last edited by orbital318; March 21st, 2012 at 11:52 AM. Reason: being less of a dick
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  5. #30
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    I think the hair is too saturated(the bright comic yellow doesn't match the more realistic skin) and the clothing too unsaturated, I also think her eyes should be a different colour as it's too similar to the colour of her clothing. Maybe change the colour of the camera strap, to make the whole image stand out more. I think her eyebrow is up too high.

    Her features are inconsistant too, some cartoony and some realistic. Like her hand takes into consideration all the bones but her eyesockets don't.

    These are just suggestions and things I saw in it, I'm not an expert so yeah, maybe I'm wrong lol I quickly did this to show what I mean, I'm sorry if it's bad T_T

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  7. #31
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    Thanks I think I am going to simplify this whole thing down and rework the face a bit. The semi real thing on an unrealistic face thing is causing too many issues creepiness and uncannyvalley-ness.

    Edit: I did a rough reworking of the face spending more time with the plains. I still think the ear could be more to the right, thoughts? I am also thinking about abandoning the shading and just going with simple cell shading as per Alice Herring's comment

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    Last edited by orbital318; March 21st, 2012 at 12:41 PM. Reason: Added pic
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  8. #32
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    Do a study of a real human girl from this angle.

    Then simplify your sketch into a cartoon.

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  9. #33
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    Paired down a lot. I do like the rendered look but I also see the comment about the shading being too much. I think it clears up the expression a bit more too.

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  10. #34
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    Her face looks much better now, and I think you've handled the critiques well and incorporated changes where you could. It's all a learning process and I've no doubt you'll take a lot away from this and apply it in later studies and projects.

    Good luck at the convention and I hope you get some good feedback.

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  11. #35
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    Yea I would go back to the cell shading when you figure everything else out. Looking good though.

    EDIT:
    Woop didnt see a second page! Looks much better that way with that type of rendering.

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