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Wanted to post this before tightly working on anything as I feel the base of this image could be stronger. Other threads on here have been really helpful and instead on lurk-learning I thought I'd get stuck in and post myself.
Would appreciate critique on any elements of this piece you think need work.
From my view perspective and lighting and main points I'd like to be able to improve, but please point out any other areas in need of attention.
You've got a very obvious lightsource with those rays of light, and I don't think your shading always lines up with it. I think it'd be a little more like this:
(Though it looks like you're going for a dimmer atmosphere, so maybe not that bright?)
A couple of other issues - I'm not sure what's going on with her hand resting on the ground... is that a knife? Is her hand bleeding? That's my best guess, but it's not very clear.
Also, the way her knees seem to be resting on the ground, and the way her dress is fanning out, seems to be at a steeper perspective than the background you've defined with the stairs. (The wall corner coming off the stairs is a bit curved, so I don't know what to make of it.)
Thanks very much for your input Revidescent. Greatly appreciated.
What I had in my head regarding the light was that there was basically a few beams and they would be the main illuminators of certain parts of her, I wanted the rest of her to look more like it was in shadow, but I obviously didn't push it back enough.
(I certainly like what you did and in general I'm a fan of bright and a little over saturated) Perhaps I'll go less contrasting, I'll certainly have a play.
Originally the wall on the left had a window and the glass on that had shatters and thus the light beams, that's what caused the (still present) broken glass to be on the floor next to her which is what she used to cut the butterfly from her dress. It's good to know now that's not reading right though.
I don't think I know what to make of the background either XD The back wall angle to her on the floor I know is off but am not sure how to fix...
Thought I'd do myself justice and edit the pic to what I -thought- I'd done in the first place but clearly hadn't. Thought I'd post for so people could see what I was trying to go for originally.
Made it look like the illuminations are in beams and shadowing the rest of her. While it's more atmospheric there's probably to much in shadow now. Can't seem to find any references of people half in half out light like that. Will probably go with brighter.
Last edited by Girl_in_Grey; January 12th, 2012 at 12:47 AM.
This is a nice idea and there are some good things going on with your drawing right now, but in order for the image to appear the way (I think) you intended, you need to rearrange your value pattern. I realize that this is basically a line-based, stylized drawing, however, I think it would be beneficial to consider the light and shadow aspect in a more realistic manner.
Right now the effect of the light on the forms cannot be 'felt' because everything is very similar in value. Creating a distinct separation of light and shadow will allow you to accentuate the action of the light filtering down from the window, as well as the resulting reflected light from the floor and dress. I made a rough painting to give you an idea of what I mean. You may not want to make the image as dark as I have, but the underlying idea of clear separation of light and shadow is what's most important. I think your use of a yellow/purple color scheme could work really well.
I would also suggest taking a step back and really working the linear perspective out. If you're having trouble, check out Loomis' "Successful Drawing" for some good info on the basics. Hope this helps.
Thanks for what you did with image, always really helps seeing it from someone else point of view. Yeah that was more what I had going on in my mind. I see now I need to make the BG a fair bit darker to push it back, probably wont go quite as far as you did, but you really captured the way I need to go in order to to get it more how I intended.
I like what you did with the edges of her dress. I need to find some good refs for what happens to a circular skirt on the floor. I also like how you made the butterfly more focal by brightening her.
Appreciate it JavierP
When I've done perspective drawings previously I've always done them from scratch, or have a good reference. I did try and red line this with one point perspective but because the girls and wall are not on the same perspective I had a hard time figuring out what was right and wrong. I think a problem is I want the windows to be fully in shot for aesthetic reasons, however if they were in a real room the would be a lot taller and go out of shot, but when I put them like that you kind of 'loose' you eye up in that direction.
Thank you for the warm response. I was slightly worried it would be shot down because of its 'cartoony' nature.
I'm off to brush up on my Loomis and push the painting further. I'll keep you posted on the developments.
and a little bit later...
Since all the help has been regards to the lighting and values I decided to just work on those for a bit to get them down, I can then apply better perspective.
Still needs tightening up a bit, like the BG needs to be pushed a little further back, (and elements like location of the light circle will be placed better when I figure out the perspective) but I'm happy how its playing out.
Well it's been a while, as sometimes happens, but still working on this. Thought I'd post an update:
Didn't quite get the perspective, but through this I have learned about 2 point so will implement it better next time from the sketching phase.
Not finished but felling a little more cohesive. Now it's getting her face and eyes to look right...
Hows it look to you?
Pushing forward with this one...
Decided to go more semi-realistic with the face now.
Was fun to use my own face for lighting and reference, but I'm relatively new to drawing like this and can't quite put my finger on whats off. Tried to improve the body as well...
Any and all help appreciated.. am I going in the right direction? I just feel like I need other sets of eyes to look at this!
Nice work. If you want to revise the anatomy, you might want to find some reference for her legs...right now it looks like her upper body is attached to an enormous jellybean.
Hehe okay thanks XD
I've been using photos of myself in that pose for reference, looking at it now my drawings legs are wider and could use more shadow definition underneath them. Ta.
The new version looks great; it's really come a long way. One thing I don't really understand though is that shadow on the floor - how is it the butterfly is casting a shadow but the arm is not? I don't think the butterfly would cast a sharp shadow at that distance anyway considering it's so small and semi-transparent.
The 'shadow' was supposed to be where shes cut the butterfly out of her dress, it's then flying away. (Like she's trapped but is setting it free)
Well now I know I haven't clearly demonstrated that concept XD
Shes supposed to be using some broken glass from the windows behind her, I was going to add that once I'd rendered the BG, need to make that all clearer then.
Thanks for the feedback!
Oh right, I see what you mean. Maybe it would be more obvious if the cut part of the cloth was on a part of the dress that overlapped with her body so her skin shows through or make the ground (and therefore the butterfly shape as well) a more noticeable color and texture. Like, if the ground had a red carpet, for example, the red showing through that cut cloth would be much more obvious. But the placement may also be an issue because the arm should have a cast shadow there (as Javier noted in his paint over).