Why can't I break out?
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  1. #1
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    Why can't I break out?

    I work pretty long and early hours on an assembly line. When I get home I have the cooking duty (my room mate has the driving and laundry duty; we work in same company). When all's done there's like 1 or 2 hours at most left before dropping to sleep.

    The thing is if I do what I need to do and go straight to try and make art, I'd be ignoring my room mate and what little human interaction/socializing is left to me. I thought that might be too rude and anti-social. Despite already bought an awesome noise-canceling earphone to block out endless TV distraction next to me, I'm still having trouble getting any drawing done at all.

    Do I really need to be rude and shut the door in my room mate's face as soon as I'm home and done with cooking duty for the sake of perhaps some art-making? I'm already feeling very isolated and weird as it is, I don't want to turn into some world-hating crazy in an assembly line going into 30-year-old.

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    Dude ,

    Draw with your room mate in the room, let him watch tv and you draw. Learn to talk and draw at the same time. If you become a pro you will be in a room full of people talking and interacting and interupting you to multitask. Think of it as on the job training.

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    Also, how does your roommate factor into YOUR life at all? Frankly, who cares about a roommate? What is this "cooking duty" you speak of? Does that mean you cook for him?

    Sorry, but Eff that. Stop the shared duties and tell him to do his own laundry and cook his own meals and you do the same. Learn to eat fast so it doesn't soak up that much time. Once you get down to being able to have a good solid 3-4 hours a night of solid art time, then you can figure out which days you want to work hard and which days you want to be social.

    Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to be social EVERY night. Also, your roommate can be your friend but if he's infringing on your goals it's time to reassess that situation.

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    Just explain to him you want to work on some art and that's why you won't hang out with him all the time. That should be it.

    You don't have to play at being a hermit all the time, just work when you want to and when you feel you have time go be social with people.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
    Do I really need to be rude and shut the door in my room mate's face as soon as I'm home and done with cooking duty for the sake of perhaps some art-making?
    You're an adult, right? Talk about this with your roommate, it's not like you have to slam the door to his face and say "eff you, I'm drawing". Including Dpaint's suggestions of drawing an socializing, I'm sure you can sit down with your pal, explain that you want to have some peaceful art time and it doesn't mean you'll stop interacting with him completely. Maybe take turns on using headphones so he can watch TV without the noise distracting you as much. Who knows, maybe your roommate even would like some solitary time of his own too.
    And if your roommate thinks that not spending every evening being social with him is unreasonable, then like Dusty said, that's not healthy behavior and you should reassess the situation.

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    I've been through that. It's just a rough patch. Whatever, if you love drawing, then you'll come back to it. If you don't then you don't need it. I've had years where I honestly gave art the back seat and those were some of my best years. But I still drew every once in a while, because it's too much fun to give up on. I've definitely had a mess of room mates that prohibited me from drawing. It was good life experience, which gave me a never ending supply of subject matter to draw.

    Last edited by Raoul Duke; November 17th, 2011 at 03:38 AM.
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    I like the incorporate room mate into drawing idea, will try that.

    This room mate got me this job and ended my 1.5 year unemployment, and let me use the couch. 30% rent. I feel I owe him big. She is driving to/from work, and does laundry in a specific way (laundry is next to bedroom). That's how I ended up volunteering for the cooking duty. However it does eat up a lot of time because of cooking meals either before and/or after work... and it seems there is no way to speed this process up enough to save time, except to just not cook and eat bagle/sandwiches.

    I don't talk to people a lot at work. So my room mate became the only person I have conversation with. It's gotten me feeling insecure about the kind of person I am (crazy hermit).

    At the end of each day, exhaustion made me just want to do brain-less things or just sleep, instead of draw.

    I know I sound like a weak, whining wimp, but I honestly want to break this stalemate and get stronger as a person, so my art can survive. Seems like a talk with room mate might have to happen. I just gotta think about how to put things....

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    yeah dude, have you ever heard of drink n draw?
    its a group i used to go to every week for a little over a year where a bunch of people meet up at a BAR and draw while drinking and socializing.
    TV with your roomate shouldn't prevent you from drawing! it might prevent you from being overly detailed which i think is a good thing. be loose, sloppy, do quick sketches, go nuts.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
    However it does eat up a lot of time because of cooking meals either before and/or after work... and it seems there is no way to speed this process up enough to save time, except to just not cook and eat bagle/sandwiches.
    So, cooking up more food and eating it for couple days hasn't worked for you? It would speed up eating for at least a day since re-heating something takes less time and attention (and you can draw at the same time), and if you vary your food enough, it shouldn't become dull.

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    Artwork is a solitary lifestyle. Hours and hours of alone time is what you need to grow. Do what you need to do.

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  17. #11
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    I'm having a bit of a hard time figuring where the problem lies.


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    I do a lot of sketches on the go, for example in a pub or just chatting to friends, pretty much wherever I go. And it's a pretty cool way to hook up too xD (just a joke)
    If there's some free time I draw quick sketches of people, just trying to nail a pose. Samwise Didier from Blizzard draws when he's on the phone. It takes him aparently hundreds of calls before he finishes an illustration but he does this type of thing. Just keep a little sketchbook on you, and doodle whenever you can have your hands free.

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    Quote Originally Posted by TinyBird View Post
    So, cooking up more food and eating it for couple days hasn't worked for you? It would speed up eating for at least a day since re-heating something takes less time and attention (and you can draw at the same time), and if you vary your food enough, it shouldn't become dull.
    True this, a big pot of chilli, soup, curry, whatever takes basically the same prep and cooking time as a small pot. Freeze whatever's left for some other day.
    Repeat regularly and you soon have a freezer full of meals ready to go.

    Edit: you don't even need to buy proper tupperware dishes, the ones you get fried rice in from the local Chinese work perfectly well. If you're even reasonably friendly with the bloke at the takeaway he can sell you a pile of them for next to nothing.

    Last edited by Flake; November 17th, 2011 at 10:22 PM.
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    When I started getting a bit obsessive with weight training I started pre-making my meals for the week. Like Flake suggests, you can set aside an hour or two and cook a weeks worth of meats (beef, chicken, pork etc.) and some sort of carbs (beans, rices, pastas) and pack them into tupperwear containers ready for the week. It saves alot of time.

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    I don't get why you can't draw most days and have chill time with your roommate other days. What about weekends?

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    What's wrong with being a crazy hermit anyway?

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    I know it's easier said than done, but you could consider finding a new place / new job too. It's not easy but can be done, and as mentioned simply explaining to your room mate that you want to focus on your own studies is more than nothing, and might work out for the best.

    Don't worry about being anti-social. If you're doing art then being antisocial at times comes with the territory, but you can still have your cake and eat it too (you can get more done in an hour than you might think)

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    I find plenty of time to draw, and I do that when I am alone in one room. Am I being a crazy hermit? No. But, I do enjoy spending time with people. I love drawing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by TinyBird View Post
    So, cooking up more food and eating it for couple days hasn't worked for you? It would speed up eating for at least a day since re-heating something takes less time and attention (and you can draw at the same time), and if you vary your food enough, it shouldn't become dull.
    Been trying to do that, since I do the cooking, no picky!

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    Quote Originally Posted by JJacks View Post
    I don't get why you can't draw most days and have chill time with your roommate other days. What about weekends?
    I don't want to think about weekends. If I get a full 8~10 hour sleep for one of those nights I will consider it a non-work weekend.

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    I really appreciate y'all replying. Don't feel so odd and left out right now. I guess, to clarify a bit maybe, the problem is I cannot blend in or communicate well with the people around me all the time. I feel I should get along with other people, but I don't, except room mate. And I haven't been doing any art for a long time. I'm losing my sense of self-worth basically - no art, no meaningful relationship with people, no family. So I'm stuck between what I want to do (and turn into a crazy hermit ), and what I think I should do to be a balanced person or something.

    Will focus harder to draw something.

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    I can definitely relate to everything you've written, and yes we can all romanticize being a hermit. But personally I get the feeling your passion has dwindled, in my experience when the passion is fully there nothing can stand in its way.

    I think you should work on your social anxiety first and foremost and you'll see that everything will start falling into place. When you're happy in your own skin your passions and creativity will come forward.

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    10 hours of sleep!? Maybe you could work on that as well.

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    what Medusa said, 10 hours of sleep is a lot (I operate on 4-6. and Coffee.. unhealthy but while we're young, f*ck it).


    But, two mottos i live by:

    It ain't a problem unless you worry about it.

    and

    I'd rather people hate me for what I am than love me for what I am not.

    And, seriously, I truly wish you good luck dude. I've was in similar shoes when I was younger, but I dealt with it. And where I am now, is wonderful.

    So, I know I came out a bit deuchebaggy on my former post, but everything still boils down to : do what you want to do.

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  32. #25
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    Cow

    Quote Originally Posted by tobbA View Post
    What's wrong with being a crazy hermit anyway?
    You start talking to your drawings.

    "Yeah baby, yeah, you know you like that shading on your inner thigh dontcha, Mmmmm, yeah. Like it with the kneaded eraser ya dirty little girl, ah yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh."


    .........or, so I've heard...*cough*

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