Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 31
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts

    Leaving home - what should I take with me?

    Look, I am not here to be told if I should join the military, go to college, or get a job. Not here to be judged either. I don't have the energy to explain my situation over and over again so just read and answer my questions.

    I am sure many of you guys had to go through tough times, even be homeless for a while.. How the fuck did you manage? Except, I doubt I will be homeless for quite a while but I prepare for the worst. My main questions are in bold. They are pretty much this:
    1. Assuming I already have loads to carry, should I take my art supplies
    2. What should I do with my portfolio pieces? Leave or take, especially when I don't even like them?

    I read this: http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=144069
    Even ended up finding another post rofl but won't link to it because the OP got bashed.


    I hear about kids getting kicked out or leaving home. How? What do you take with you? I mean, I am sure none of you were like the idiots in the documentaries about runaway teenagers who just sprint out of home with $10, canned food, and a half-charged gameboy and end up living as male hookers on the streets of L.A.

    I am thinking of taking only what I can carry with me, but maybe that's just impractical. I plan to find a job, even in a different state (preferably), find rent around the area, and then move there taking at least money, some clothes, and important documents. I am trying to be as quiet as I can about this so when I finally announce to my folks that I am going to support myself and not go to Asia with them, they can't do anything to pull me back. When I leave, I am getting absolutely no support from family and relatives (who knows the situation I am going through but they don't want to be part of it, and I can tell they're annoyed when I am around). I would ask friends, but they're all going to college and living in dorms.

    What do I take with me? I have things that I want to take that are not life essentials but may prove themselves useful later on. For example, art supplies. I used them a bit so it's not like I can just sell them. I have some unopened sets, but who would want them since they're not name brand anyway? (If you're interested, send me a PM and I'll show you pictures of them)

    I would like to draw and paint when I live alone, but what's the chance of drawing if I am scrambling on my feet to earn a living with a min-wage job? And, perhaps even depressed? At home, I've been depressed to the point that I haven't been drawing for a while, and when I try to draw, I only end up wasting paint. Yea, I said it. Depressed. Even went on a suicide trip until I got back to my senses. But maybe I only feel this way because of my home situation and once I go out to the world, the hardship will give me energy and will to survive.

    I am not particularly good at painting so I may only end up drawing things for my own comfort and not for selling or portfolio for the first few months. I plan on taking classes for art, if I can afford it. Maybe I should just stick with digital, which I sort of hate but I am trying to learn more anyway because maybe knowing digital art will help me gain some extra income.

    Speaking of portfolio, what about my previous portfolio pieces? I drew them and got accepted to SAIC, but I am not even sure if my parents want me to go to a college anymore. And these pieces.. yes, I did work hard on them but they're not "mine", you get what I mean? Like, these pieces don't represent me as an artist, I could care less if they burn in a house fire. I might as well sell them. They're so impersonal that I don't want to use them. But, should I take them anyway if I plan on entering an art college? If I don't use them, they're just going to be a burden on me.

    As I said, I am trying to take only what I can carry. Is that practical? I am taking clothes and other stuff, and I am not sure if I can even fit the art tools in there. I don't have a luggage out on display in my living room or anything either because I am trying to take things one by one unnoticed. I am thinking of taking colored pencils, markers, and the miniscule stuff while leaving behind the brushes, watercolors, acrylics, oils. But then I should take them because if I want to paint again, I'll have to repurchase all those things again.. ugh.


    People who leave home without parent support.. how the fuck do they do it?


    Sorry if my post is just a rambling wall of text, totally unorganized. I even have a hard time forming coherent sentences in RL these days. Shit has been happening at home that got the police involved once. Have patience with me. BUT PLEASE READ IF YOU CAN before you flame me or ask me something over and over again.
    Last edited by stragan; May 23rd, 2011 at 10:16 PM.


  2. Hide this ad by registering as a member
  3. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Virginia, USA
    Posts
    2,069
    Thanks
    992
    Thanked 2,185 Times in 755 Posts

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    SPACE, MUTHAFLIPPER
    Posts
    1,497
    Thanks
    2,744
    Thanked 1,045 Times in 379 Posts
    According to his profile he's fourteen but I'm not sure how soon that was updated. He joined in 2009.

    He's probably nearing 17/18 right now if he put his age right when he joined.

    There's plenty of folks who don't get out at that age. 21 and 25 are common ages to get out of the house independently. Some stay much longer than that, but usually at least working by then, a few helping out their folks who have disabilities or need company.

    I'm 21 and I'm having trouble deciding to do with my life right now. I've had several entry-level jobs in the past but the economy is so bad now and employers are more picky now - preferring people with experience. Even if there was an opening for a fast food restaurant, it probably wouldn't be a good idea for me at least, having multiple food intolerances: gluten, soy (not even soy lecithin - headaches like mad), avocados (not joking), dairy, eggs, pork, etc. I can't even stand to be around most generic industrial-grade cleaning products.

    Some people can get out of their home fast, some can't. I don't know what your situation is like, but just learn as much as you can and don't let your parents make you feel less than you are. I wish the best for you.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    I have been 18 since last year. I have a month until I graduate so I am not leaving until then. Been saving changes and anything I can get hands on, asking a teacher about rent and taxes and stuff (since my own parents refuse to teach me such things). My family is definitely deciding to move (in other words, "run away" somewhere) and I refuse to let them destroy my opportunities and chances any longer. I can't move there either because once I go there, I am fucked because physical violence isn't even illegal there.

    I know there are plenty of people who don't get out. Hell, 99% of the seniors at my school go straight to college. Anyway, I am not here to ask if I should leave or not. I already asked that question so many times and I always got the same answer, which is "yes you have legit reasons to leave. get the hell out when you can". I don't want to repeat my life story all over again. I am here to ask about what I should take with me.

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    801
    Thanks
    19
    Thanked 428 Times in 168 Posts
    Details on why your doing this, cause without them your just making a bad decision that will most likely end horribly...

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    274
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 81 Times in 60 Posts
    If you are 18 then go to college if that's what you want to do (you pay the bill anyway who cares what your parents think)(federal aid and what not). Being homeless sucks man, unless your alternative is worse (physical, sexual, extreme emotional abuse)you can figure something out. I know it doesn't really answer your questions but I think cooling off a bit and thinking of your situation logically would be your best bet. Talk to some people you trust who know you and are stable preferably a bit more experienced in life (wont just dismiss your thoughts but wont just say "hell yeah be a renegade").
    ANDREWS WEBSITE I am available for work
    REIGN OF THE GODS strategic fantasy warfare board game

  8. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    SPACE, MUTHAFLIPPER
    Posts
    1,497
    Thanks
    2,744
    Thanked 1,045 Times in 379 Posts
    I would take the art supplies if I were you... You definitely don't want to repurchase those again. You never know, maybe you can find whatever small amount of time from a minimum wage job to draw/paint again. I suggest looking at Jason Manley's story if you haven't already. I'm not even sure what kind of supplies you have. If your portfolio pieces aren't too big enough to carry around, take those with you too.

    You still have some time to decide and think clearly about this for a while... If people are overwhelmingly telling you "yes you have legit reasons to leave. get the hell out when you can" then it may seem like you have to leave, but they could be wrong. I have no idea what you're going through right now and honestly hope everything turns out all right.

  9. #8
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Alberta, Canada
    Posts
    3,177
    Thanks
    752
    Thanked 2,362 Times in 1,214 Posts
    And if you can't do college consider joining the army. Minimum wage is a hole you might never dig yourself out of. Stuff is the least of your worries -- if you don't have a place to put it then it's likely going to be stolen anyway, and you can always get more stuff.
    *** Sketchbook * Landscapes * Portfolio * Store***

    "There are two kinds of students: the self-taught and the hopeless."
    - Dr. Piotr Rudnicki

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    On the surface, there is the physical restrainment, being hit and slapped, being locked in a room, being ganged up on my own family members. Family trying to run away from US to some ambiguous country in asia because they think the anti-christ is coming with his legion of illuminati/freemasons. Some crazy conspiracy shit like that. Not to mention that I'll probably be tied to bed for more exorcism like how they did to me when I was a child. I am so sick of it. By the way, my mom was looking for my passport, which I hid so she can't sign me up for a plane ticket.

    I know nobody, but I did go to the school for help and they're helping me find resources and stuff. But I want to know, what should I take with me?

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to stragan For This Useful Post:


  12. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    SPACE, MUTHAFLIPPER
    Posts
    1,497
    Thanks
    2,744
    Thanked 1,045 Times in 379 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by vineris View Post
    And if you can't do college consider joining the army. Minimum wage is a hole you might never dig yourself out of. Stuff is the least of your worries -- if you don't have a place to put it then it's likely going to be stolen anyway, and you can always get more stuff.
    There are veterans from the Iraq war who are homeless right now... No one wants to get PTSD either... Although I've met some people who've done this and they seem okay.

  13. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    velderia, I already put a link to jason's post on my open post. I read it like several times. Too bad I can't just absorb his courage just by reading about him.

  14. #12
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Frankfort, IN
    Posts
    245
    Thanks
    33
    Thanked 57 Times in 43 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by velderia View Post
    There are veterans from the Iraq war who are homeless right now... No one wants to get PTSD either... Although I've met some people who've done this and they seem okay.
    If you go that route, go Coast Guard.. all the military benefits without the PTSD. SO glad my son did CG instead of the others.

  15. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    SPACE, MUTHAFLIPPER
    Posts
    1,497
    Thanks
    2,744
    Thanked 1,045 Times in 379 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by stragan View Post
    On the surface, there is the physical restrainment, being hit and slapped, being locked in a room, being ganged up on my own family members. Family trying to run away from US to some ambiguous country in asia because they think the anti-christ is coming with his legion of illuminati/freemasons. Some crazy conspiracy shit like that. Not to mention that I'll probably be tied to bed for more exorcism like how they did to me when I was a child. I am so sick of it. By the way, my mom was looking for my passport, which I hid so she can't sign me up for a plane ticket.

    I know nobody, but I did go to the school for help and they're helping me find resources and stuff. But I want to know, what should I take with me?
    That sounds awful... Have you tried contacting the police or local social workers? This is just plain abusive. There's no excuse for exorcism, not even religious, especially if you were actually tied down - Some people get suffocated and killed from that.

    And I'm not sure what else you should take with you because I'm not even sure what you have.

  16. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    As I said, there was an incident when the police had to be involved. They often said that they can't do anything as long as I didn't have any physical marks (getting physically pushed down and being slapped doesn't leave bruises or cuts no matter how hard they slap), but once I got a -very- minor scratch from defending myself, they had to talk to my family. I stayed with my relatives until I got kicked out.

    And for what I have, I have enough that would last me quite a long time. They can fit in a small box but weigh like three chihuahuas. Seriously, read my OP, I am sure I wrote some stuff there. Did you read it? I know I am not being clear, I am really out of the loop right now and got referred to therapy because I was so unclear when I talk to my school social service department.

    I am definitely leaving the canvases behind because they're too big and would likely just tear while moving around.

  17. #15
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Southeast coast, USA
    Posts
    2,787
    Thanks
    511
    Thanked 507 Times in 342 Posts
    Do you have any friends who live on their own you can room with? Any parents of friends who would let you couch surf for a bit? That would make for a good transitional period for you to find a job and build up the funds for living on your own.

    As to the question of what to take, no I don't think you need to hold on to everything. Get good digital copies of your portfolio and store them online (Like with your email account, Dropbox, Amazon Cloud, etc.). That way you have them for college, but don't have to lug around the originals. As for what else...depends on what you can feasibly haul. No sense in telling you to keep XYZ if you don't have a car, or money for a storage unit, or a place to stay. Better to get another place to stay lined up before you ask these questions.

  18. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    Yeah, sometimes I wonder if I exaggerated my situation. But then, maybe I am just brainwashed. A lot of people who go through abuse blame themselves or think their issues aren't a big deal, so I have to be aware of that too.

    Vineris, I don't want to end up homeless.. with a missing arm. I am not combat material, but I can research about non-combat options. But all in all, I would rather stay away from the military because they own my life if I get in there. I can always say "lol I am gay" and get kicked out, but.. no.

  19. #17
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    Do you have any friends who live on their own you can room with?

    No. I have friends who are going to their own dorms. I can always get on craiglist and find cheap rooming, but how trustworthy is it? I never used it before but I would have to try anyway. I can ask the parents, definitely. Wow, I can even ask my teachers LOL
    I am frightened of the friction it will cause though. I am not that sociable right now. I creep a lot of people out because I rarely talk and when I do, I babble almost (which is probably why I got referred to a therapist for a 'fix up')
    I mean, I am not going to just sit around their house watching TV and doing nothing. I would help out with chores and stuff, if they don't mind.

    I do have some money stashed up in a secret bank though, like 2000 in usable value. I can just call right now and rent a place, but I need to think deeply before doing something like that. A lot of people are like "wow just leave", but I am thinking, "well, they're family and they don't hurt me all the time." But nonetheless, all these thoughts still sum down to one conclusion anyway: get the fuck out.

    Anyway, my money that would deplete in no time if I don't have a job, so the big buck is just a backup. Let's pretend I am going without any savings. God forbid that I need medical care..

    And, really? Are digital copies good enough? I heard some places want the originals, like RISD and Calarts (not that I am interested in them that much but I would like to keep my options open?)

  20. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    274
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 81 Times in 60 Posts
    Well check decent relatives first...then friends....Do you have a car? Or are you back packing it? Get some information on local homeless shelters in case you get stuck. Sometimes they have programs to help you get a job too. Something to help you out until you make your decision with school or military or minimum wage route. I hope someone helps you out because without some help it will be very difficult. Whatever you do, don't start drinking or using drugs.
    ANDREWS WEBSITE I am available for work
    REIGN OF THE GODS strategic fantasy warfare board game

  21. #19
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    velderia, do you suggest that I just take as much art supplies as I can, as long as I can handle them?

  22. #20
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by GuruGaia View Post
    Well check decent relatives first...then friends....Do you have a car? Or are you back packing it? Get some information on local homeless shelters in case you get stuck. Sometimes they have programs to help you get a job too. Something to help you out until you make your decision with school or military or minimum wage route. I hope someone helps you out because without some help it will be very difficult. Whatever you do, don't start drinking or using drugs.
    I am backpacking, but if I truly decide to leave (I "truly decided" to leave several times, but somehow I am still thinking "should I really do that")
    If I truly decide to leave, I would locally rent now and just slowly move little by little or move it to a friend's house (but I distrust because my friends aren't genuine people and parents are usually worse). I might ask my relatives to take me in again even if they seem annoyed with me.. lol
    My school department is helping me find resources, like the shelters. I am very glad lol makes me a bit less insane. It's hard not to drink when the alcohol is around (and whenever my dad is around, there is always alcohol around), but I haven't drank for a long time now.

  23. #21
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    274
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 81 Times in 60 Posts
    Well go on craigslist and look for people looking for a roomate (cheaper rent), bring a friend with you when you go interview so you arent as nervous about creeps. Start applying for jobs too, better chance getting a place if they know you already have a job.
    ANDREWS WEBSITE I am available for work
    REIGN OF THE GODS strategic fantasy warfare board game

  24. #22
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by GuruGaia View Post
    Well go on craigslist and look for people looking for a roomate (cheaper rent), bring a friend with you when you go interview so you arent as nervous about creeps. Start applying for jobs too, better chance getting a place if they know you already have a job.
    Yeah. My first priority is to get a job first. Any job is opportunity lol. I have a feeling I can sneak into my old home once my family leaves for asia. That might be an option, but I have yet to see.

  25. #23
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Southeast coast, USA
    Posts
    2,787
    Thanks
    511
    Thanked 507 Times in 342 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by stragan View Post
    I have a feeling I can sneak into my old home once my family leaves for asia.
    The more info you give us, the more and more complicated your situation becomes. I'm thinking this is definitely something that your school councilors could help you with much more effectively than a bunch of strangers on the internet. You need to be telling all these details to someone you trust who has real insight and power to assist you.
    Last edited by Mirana; May 19th, 2011 at 12:45 AM.

  26. #24
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Alberta, Canada
    Posts
    3,177
    Thanks
    752
    Thanked 2,362 Times in 1,214 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by velderia View Post
    There are veterans from the Iraq war who are homeless right now... No one wants to get PTSD either... Although I've met some people who've done this and they seem okay.
    Well, everything in life is a risk. There are no guarantees. It IS an option, though.
    *** Sketchbook * Landscapes * Portfolio * Store***

    "There are two kinds of students: the self-taught and the hopeless."
    - Dr. Piotr Rudnicki

  27. #25
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    chitown.
    Posts
    381
    Thanks
    69
    Thanked 90 Times in 30 Posts
    Well, I am already making plans with the school people.

    But for you guys, I don't think you guys need to know about my situation except that I have a lot of things to carry and I can get a room (rent). I am thinking of only taking as much art supplies as I can carry without being too burdened. Or, if I should take them at all. I am sure I am not the only person here who drew and had to consider taking some supplies with them whenever they moved.. so..

  28. #26
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    7
    Thanked 28 Times in 8 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by stragan View Post
    Well, I am already making plans with the school people.

    But for you guys, I don't think you guys need to know about my situation except that I have a lot of things to carry and I can get a room (rent). I am thinking of only taking as much art supplies as I can carry without being too burdened. Or, if I should take them at all. I am sure I am not the only person here who drew and had to consider taking some supplies with them whenever they moved.. so..
    Ask one of your teachers if you could store those art supplies in their garage or something until you get settled into your own space.

  29. #27
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    343
    Thanks
    44
    Thanked 65 Times in 48 Posts
    How about contacting some sort of social services? I know US has a bad reputation for social care (at least compared to Europe), but there's bound to be something around, right?

    Another option is to try and get some sort of scholarship. Again I don't really know to whom you would need to turn for this, but I would suppose your school could at least point you in the right direction.

    You could look for some kind of Au-pair job. You get a roof over your head, food and some spending money for taking care of kids. Not sure how this could work out if you are trying to go to college at the same time, but I suppose it's worth taking a look at.

  30. #28
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Hudson River valley, NY
    Posts
    16,201
    Thanks
    4,875
    Thanked 16,685 Times in 5,021 Posts
    Stragan, it sounds like life has been dealing you a pretty shitty hand so far. The good news is that you're at an age when you can do something about it, and you seem to be doing so. Keep at it. I know from this and previous threads that you tend to have self-esteem problems, and that's not surprising, considering the bits and pieces of your background that you've dropped. But your work is good, good enough to get into SAIC, which is no small feat. Take control of your life. Refuse to be a victim. Don't be afraid of help. Things may seem desperate and scary and confusing now (and they are and should), but you are still very young, and in the long run this will be a very short part of your life.
    Sorry I can't offer advice more specific to your questions, I hope this helps at least a little bit. Good luck.

    Tristan Elwell
    **Finished Work Thread **Process Thread **Edges Tutorial

    "Work is more fun than fun."
    -John Cale

    "Art is supposed to punch you in the brain, and it's supposed to stay punched."
    -Marc Maron

  31. The Following User Says Thank You to Elwell For This Useful Post:


  32. #29
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    London
    Posts
    14,074
    Thanks
    4,224
    Thanked 6,738 Times in 4,642 Posts
    Whatever religion/sect/cult your parents belong to, there will be other people who have been there and escaped. I would suggest you find them as they could be a great support for you. They will know exactly what you're going through and will probably be in the best position to advise. They may also be able to give practical help. The internet has made access to survivors easier. Tread warily and check first.

    Store whatever you can with friend's parents, teachers etc. Take with you what you value the most, is of immediate use or what you can use to make money. Good luck and don't forget your toothbrush.

  33. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Black Spot For This Useful Post:


  34. #30
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Hong Kong
    Posts
    832
    Thanks
    312
    Thanked 216 Times in 151 Posts
    Wow...and I thought I had a shitty hand life dealt me with, with my depression and schizophrenia.

    I've never had the misfortune of being homeless, or anything remotely close. So I've unfortunately no advice to give .

    I'm just curious though, are you parents trying to relocate back to Asia somewhere because of Camping's "prediction" that the world will end on the 21st of May? (Which is in a few hours time)

    Regardless, my mom's family is slightly religious - Buddhists. But I've never had to deal with malevolently religious parents. But it sounds like you're making the right choice. But please don't take my words as any preference of action, I know jack about your situation, much less becoming homeless in my teen years.

    But remember one thing: Adversity builds character.

    Anyway, good luck. I wish you the best.
    "Never regret thy fall from grace, O' spirit of Icarian flight, for the greatest tragedy of them all to face, is to never feel the burning bright"
    Believe my lies, for I tell the truth about them. Or would you rather me lie about telling the truth?

    | Sketchbook | Portfolio | dA | Facebook |

  35. The Following User Says Thank You to Maledict For This Useful Post:


Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. [WIP] Leaving Home
    By liolev in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: October 11th, 2010, 01:17 PM
  2. Art: Leaving Home
    By andreasrocha in forum Finished Art
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: June 14th, 2007, 09:18 PM
  3. Leaving Home - Environment
    By andreasrocha in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: June 12th, 2007, 09:10 AM
  4. Home Sweet Home
    By ThrillzillA in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: December 2nd, 2004, 05:43 PM

Members who have read this thread: 0

There are no members to list at the moment.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Designed by The Coldest Water, we build the coldest best water bottles, ice packs and best pillows.