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Hey all, here are three pages that I've recently done. Just wanted to ask if you guys can understand what's going on?
The only info you need is that Invisible Woman just got knocked out, and the town they're in just had a weird encounter with a featureless, giant humanoid. Hopefully that's enough!
Last edited by butch mapa; November 22nd, 2010 at 05:35 PM.
Looks good. Very professional. First they're reviving her, then there's some kind of crowd of assembled citizens that turns into a riot, then they're repairing a damaged parking structure and Invisible Girl's gettin' all emo about something or other, as superheros are in the habit of doing these days.
The composition feels a bit empty in places to me, but I suppose that's where the balloons are going to go.
Thank you very much Gian! That's perfect, and I will definitely think about things to put on the emptier spots (yeah, that's where the balloons are supposed to go, but it's probably a good idea to put some art in those spots even if they might get covered up later on)
Account no longer used, removed posts.
Last edited by BrianGarabrant; April 11th, 2012 at 08:36 PM.
Thanks for letting me know that, Brian!
In general, even including the empty spot critique:
One trick of making pictures more interesting is, to cut people on the edges. Many of your pictures are looking like their own drawing, the problem with this is, that you lose the flow. Id make everything a bit bigger, especially the pictures where you only see the heads. Instead of showing a whole portrait, with a big space above the characters, you should fill the space, even cutting the head off slightly upside from where the hair stops. As long as you see the face.
I made you an example of how i ment it (though I don't know yet, where and how speaking bubbles will be placed, as this is important too)
Beside the fact this works for some psychologic reason about how our eye and brain work, the exciting pictures are always those, that are smaller and seeming to not show everything (making you want to read on).
Last edited by Swamp Thing; November 22nd, 2010 at 09:39 PM.
Swamp Thing - that's a fantastic bit of insight! It's kind of embarrassing to admit, but I've never actually encountered that principle before. Will definitely research.
I can see how that principle can mess up balloon placements sometimes, but I can see how it does lead to more interesting images. It's certainly another "tool" that can be used from time to time.
UPDATE - I'm working on another set of samples, its interesting to try to incorporate this idea. SwampThing-- or anyone-- know where I can research it further?
Last edited by butch mapa; November 23rd, 2010 at 02:04 AM.
Glad I could help you. Not sure about sources. Right now I'm studying film and animation, also learning those codes, working for movies and comics.
I'm not sure how many of these codes you know, also I don't know any source. I can list some I know that are used very often:
Underview: For characters you want to show as dominant and powerful etc.
Downview: For characters you want to interprete as weak and cowed etc.
Generally changing the perspective from picture to picture is useful to keep up the excitment. Though, never change the position (showing from the other side, making the characters shown visa versa) as it could be irritating (as long as you don't want this effect or have any reason to make this).
In action scenes, or dramatic situations, making some transversely and sloped lines (either by sloping the picture a bit, or some things that are sloped in general, like staircases / house walls from special angles etc.). Using horizonal and vertical lines in a picture works harmonic, and is useful instead if you want to generate something common or positive.
For portraits: Your character is always combined with his background. Showing the face of a new character, you should put a background behind him that fits his personality. Working with colors and backgrounds in general, is good to underline any characters mood, but these things you know for sure, anyways. Further, position and composition is a nice tool - putting two loving characters in harmony (middle of the picture and horzinal/vertical lines) creates a fitting expression. Making the picture unharmonic (the opposite in every point) gives the viewer the impression, that this love will either break or is wrong.
Hope this helps. Generally, most codes are used unconsciously correct anyway (at least the easy ones), but just for secure (you can use them creative if you know enough about it, to break the rules). Probably you know them anyway, since theyre the most common codes.
Here're layouts for my next round of samples, I've started incorporate what you said about cropping/enlarging the images.
Thanks for the time and effort responding in this thread, I love how specific you are about the examples. I'm sure you've also helped some of the other people who have stopped by. Grazi!
Hey Butch. Overall, the artwork is great and I like your drawing style. I had some nitpicks with the first set, but I won't mention them because it would probably be too much of a bother to go back and fix all the little things up. Such is the way of the comic book artist.
With your second set above, I'm actually having a hard time following the action. I can sort of take educated guesses as to what's happening, but I don't think you want it to be ambiguous. For instance, I follow the first two panels easily enough (although I'm not sure what that dino is doing there and if he's friendly or not). In the next frame, the girl (who I identify as the same girl in the first frames only by that shirt design) goes flipping over, but I'm not sure if the guy pushed her (that would be a strange transition) or if he's just putting his hands out in a surprised reaction. The next page is really confusing. The guy is jumping (or flying??) but I can't really tell why. What is that dino doing? And what is that girl doing in that closeup panel? I guess the last panel is pretty clear.
If I knew the full storylines and all they're motivations, I'd probably want to tweak a lot of little stuff.
Good stuff, nonetheless!
Overall, the samples are really good, and way more intense and dramatic.
The last picture of the 2nd page, where she jumps to kick the guy in the next picture, Id change: I think it should look more like she just started the jump, with the legs still in the movement between pushing from the floor and kicking pose. Also i woulndt show the whole figure in this picture.
In the picture, where she kicks, Id turn her so her kicking feet steps directly into the camera.
Then, the picture directly following after she kicks the guy, I wouldnt make an area view. Eventually try to make a horizonal view, with her very big (front of camera) cornered in the right edge (probably cut on 3 sides), showing that k.o.ed guy a bit smaller (distance) left (not cornered).
Wooblood and Stefan, note that I did this update yesterday, before I saw your critiques, so they haven't been adhjusted yet. Thanks for the crits! Very specific, I appreciate that!
Woo, I hope the storytelling is a bit clearer? If not, I think I'll add an energy bolt coming from the hands to the foreground (past the girl) maybe that'll help. Also, I think I'll add more fireballs to make it clear what happened to the dino.
Stef, I'll definitely change the pic of the girl as she jumps. You're right, it should be more of a shot of her starting her jump. I'm not sure about the shot of the girl landing though, I kinda like how the top shot and the small figures diversifies the page... but I'll consider it for sure.
Thanks a lot guys!
Well I'm not sure if she is crying dramatically or not after finishing him off. On one side that wouldnt make any sense, since why should she knock him out then? On the other side, the perspective from that angle plus the space around them is a typical position for showing dramatical lonelyness / lose of somebody.
For the kick picture, I just made an example to have you see how I ment it. Isn't that a propositioning perspective?
proportions are kinda off but it's for the idea anyway, not ment as overdrawing...
wasnt sure how to place the other feet (second version looks more balanced, but less dynamic), so i made 2 versions.
Stefan, you are the man! That's above and beyond. I'll see if I can pull it off. To be brutally honest, I don't know if I have the skill level to draw in that perspective, it's kinda tricky... but I'll try!
If it's too much to deal with, just keep it the way it is, it's just one picture. You can try however, if it looks wrong, hopefully somebody will help with some overdrawing lines, maybe I can help too, though it takes a lot of time to get such poses working.
What you could try is to ask some unembarassed female friend if she poses for you.
Haha, that would be the best solution!
Here's an update, still trying to figure out the revised panels, got opinions from others as well Thanks for all the help, Stefan, much appreciated!
Unless her leg isn't focusing into the viewers direction, the shoes perspective doesn't match her leg. Though I think turning the leg will look better, than turning the shoe.
Edit: And after all, I gave her the wrong pair of (crap) shoes lol
Here're rough pencils for 2 additional pages to complete the sample.
Don't worry about that panel Stefan, I just tried a desperation tweak. But I'll probably change the panel altogether, turn both figures so they face the camera a bit more, which is kinda the way you first suggested. That would give it more energy, I think.
Just wanted to say that this is a really good thread! I learned a lot from the drawings and the advice given. Good point about not showing the whole figures to keep the momentum. I'm guilty of doing a complete drawing in each panel, but I'll try to make future stuff more dynamic this way. Thanks!
Yeah, this thread has been very helpful, love posting here.
Almost finished with the second set... going to get back to the Avengers soon...
That really looks great! It's dynamic, it's got flow, it's drawn really with patience.
Imho you should add some rendering, maybe shadings, but colour would work really fine. The problem without the shadings is, that with all the pictures and all the lines (and you invested reallly a lot of work on them), it could be confusing to look at, unless colour or shadow creates a better understanding.
Also what you could try as another technique (not as improvement of the existing), is to add more black as shadows. Like many comic artists directly put black shadow equal with their outlines (just for example: http://www.fm5.at/images/upload/show/19298.jpg ) This really works great and dramatic, especially for "darker" stories!
I'll have more blacks on the Avengers pages (coming in a few days).
Thanks for all the help Stefan! Someone on another forum loved the changes on the panel where the gal kicks the guy in the face. Couldn't have done it without ya.
Alright, back to the Avengers sample, just 2 pages to add... these two pages (an action sequence) go in before the previous 3.
Almost done! Thanks to everyone for the help!