Need critq on a WIP
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  1. #1
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    Need critq on a WIP

    This is my first posting on The concept art forums. I am trying to teach myself to paint in photoshop. This is the first full painting that I have done and I have gotten a little stuck. I need to take it to the next level and I have been looking at it for too long. I need fresh eye. Thoughts?

    Last edited by Nelloc; June 15th, 2010 at 01:34 PM.
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    Need critq on a WIP

    Here is the pic

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    Last edited by Nelloc; June 15th, 2010 at 01:34 PM.
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    Here is the original drawing.

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    Last edited by Nelloc; June 15th, 2010 at 01:35 PM.
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    I think I may have accidentally ranked your post a 1 out of 10. Really sorry I didnt mean too do that.

    I like this image Have you tried flipping the image? That always helps me when I feel lost. My first thought was that everything (and this is problem I run into all the time) had the same surface response to the lighting.

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    Thanks!

    I will try flipping it and see what happens and find some reference for the lighting. Maybe that will help for the lighting not to look like it is affecting everything the same way.

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    HI Nelloc, and welcome to CA,
    Although I really like the original drawing, as well as the overall concept, there's something troubling about the lower corner..(see image)
    It may be a perspective issue...The stuff on the structure looks like it may spill off. It may also be lighting(it's very dark and dim comparison to the rest)
    The issues don't seem to be present,or apparent in the drawing though.
    I noticed you did change it somewhat from the original.
    Sorry I couldn't be more help.
    ~Zombifried

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    Thanks for pointing that out, and the warm welcome to CA. I took out the lip of the whale when I realized that it wouldn't be that high while I was painting it. I should adjust things to make them sit flatter in the lower right hand corner. And your right it is darker, do you think I should lighten the corner or darken everything else? I kind of liked the glow of the lantern on the figure but maybe it is not working as well as I thought.

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    I like the glow as an an ambient light source. I'm not sure making the whole thing darker is a good idea, either. I'm not sure exactly how I'd go about it.
    Maybe gradually brightening the dark area would help (work in layers, so if something doesn't work , your not stuck with it)

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    I like the drawing quite a bit.

    The painting feels spatially "flat"--the foreground and background are not separating. If it were me, I'd probably do another version and try to key the colors to create more figure/ground separation (and be less murky overall.) I did the two thumbnails below--I don't think either one is great but they may be of some help.



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    Quote Originally Posted by Giacomo View Post
    I like the drawing quite a bit.

    The painting feels spatially "flat"--the foreground and background are not separating.
    I was thinking the same thing. Perhaps if you worked more with contrasting values? You need to some how make the main part of your image pop, and having deeper shadows and lighter highlights would definitely help that.

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    I really appreciate you guys taking the time to give me a hand.

    Giacomo-I think I see what you mean from your thumbnails. Using Atmospheric perspective to haze out the city, and having a value difference between the mid ground whale and the foreground whale. I felt like the foreground space (in the lower right hand corner) was empty in the drawing. I felt like it was the foreground so should have an important element.I noticed you didn't add the fisherman into your thumbs. Did you not like the fisherman at all or did you just draw over the original drawing?

    PianoxLullaby- Unfortunately because I added the figure as an after thought he is not in the best spot to be my focal point. I didn't really put anything special in the golden section. My mistake. That being said, I agree that he is not popping enough. I will work on getting him to come off the page more.

    Thanks again for all the feedback. Hopefully in the next few days I will have a new version to post.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nelloc View Post
    Did you not like the fisherman at all or did you just draw over the original drawing?
    I just painted over your original drawing---in fact, I didn't notice the difference until after I'd uploaded my paintover. Honestly, though, that fisherman is so dark he's barely noticeable anyway, at least to my eye.

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    i like the colors of the first one exept its too dark. add some reflected light and maybe some areal perspective

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    Hi there!

    I'd use the different lights in the sky to light the scene with more variation. At least catching rims here and there. For the foreground character I think the green light needs to spread out more, perhaps be more intense. With green light on ground behind him you would make out his whole silhouette.

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    Heya. Ready for some more critq's? It's mainly about the painting...

    - There's some inconsistency between the color of the sky and the color of everything else. If the color coming from the sky is a vibrant purple, then we'd expect the buildings and everything else to be lit mainly by a purplish hue. Yet the buildings are blue.

    - The planets seem like they are infront of the clouds. Obviously this cannot be the case. You should definitely use a high amount of aerial perspective on them, making the colors much duller, and you might also consider bringing some of the cloud/haze infront of them to show that they are far in the distance. Also consider giving them shadows.

    - I am not so sure that the light from the buildings would be strong enough to reach the bottoms of the whale ships. Partly because they are not pointed at the sky, but mainly I just don't think they are strong enough. This brings up the point of what to do with the shadowy areas not directly affected by light. I think what would happen in reality is that there would be a dull, greyish purple light reflecting almost everywhere as a result of reflection from the city. This same light could be used in other shadowy areas.

    - I don't think it's a good idea to put the fisherman into the painting. There's a flying whale right in the center of the image, so I doubt anyone is going to notice something relatively mundane in the lower right corner.

    - Another lighting dilemma that I see is that nothing is illuminating the hut on the whale's back. It becomes uninteresting. To fix this I would consider adding outdoor lighting to the building. Many structures have outside lights, either as part of the design or to serve some purpose. Think about where you might put some lanterns, pillars, or just stripes emitting light. Allow these to illuminate both the hut and the whale.

    good luck with it

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    Ok so I worked on it a little this morning, and I just noticed the new comments. I will take them into account and make further changes tonight.

    I mostly dealt with the lack of atmospheric perspective. I lightened up the whales, pushed the planets and the city back, and changed the color of the city to match the sky. I am still working on the foreground lighting to make it stand out more. I will also address the parking structure tonight, adding lights to it.

    Oh and I switched it to read left to right. I thought that might help with the flow a bit.

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    It does look like an improvement this way...I do think there does have to be additional lighting on the building on the whale/ship's back.

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    Ok I worked on the lighting of the garage and changed the foreground a bit. I am still working on the cars and need to do more with the textures and the foreground.

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    I think it's improving, but a few things to point out still...

    The buildings. Aerial perspective isn't only about adding haziness and muted colors, you also have to add way less detail. With the amount of haze you've added, the buildings in the far distance would be mere silhouettes, and their lights would not be seen almost at all. Here's an example pic. Note how you can mostly just see the outlines of the distant buildings.

    The planets. They lack shadow and they are still too vivid in terms of color. Here's one example of the types of shadows I'm referring to. It gives the planets some depth and makes it a bit more believable that they are out in the sky somewhere. In your case, you may also consider removing most of the colors from the planets. Due to the large amount of clouds in the sky, you would barely make out any colors at all. If you saw anything, it would be a few light outlines of the planets' rims.

    The lighting. I'm not sure why you've removed the interior lighting on the house dealy, but I think it took away some interest from the interior. Also, the lanterns could be a bit bigger and brighter towards the center. You can hardly tell they're there. The lighting in general could look a lot richer (example1, example2). Lighting is basically the thing that will make a building look awesome at night. Lights inside, outside, pointing up, down, at the building, up from the building, arranged in lines, etc etc etc. Leaving it dark makes it look dull.

    cheers

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    I'm working on the lighting of the building still but it is still sketchy at this point. I added a flying car entering the garage and am playing with lite windows instead of empty holes. Maybe they should be less opaque so that the cars inside are more visible. Not sure yet. I adjusted the cityscape and the planets. I am still not happy with the ring on the large planet but I can keep hacking away at it.

    I tried to make it more clear that there are areas on the mid ground whale that have plants, barnacles and fisherman on them. Hoping that will explain that the one in the left hand corner is standing on a whales back not on a hill.

    Thanks again for all the constructive criticism. It has helped me to push this painting allot further than I would have by myself.

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