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Thread: noob wants advice
December 16th, 2009 #1
noob wants advice
o hai, I'm sorry I'v been absent, I'v had a pretty downer in life so I vanished.
I'll try to make a comeback with this post.
Its a picture thats actually 'finished' in some status but if I might be honest ... its missing something and its like I can't find it.
I have this feeling with pretty much -every thing- I draw .
Any advice would be great ty all.
srry I had to shrink it to forum size
Hide this ad by registering as a memberDecember 16th, 2009 #2
To be honest, I like this image. But I dont yet LOVE it.
Lets review_ I feel the background is top-notch, regardless of shape or form, it creates a palpable sense of scale and space, with some nice colours and textures for good measure.
The creature, im less enamoured by. The beast itself is a fairly nice piece of design, the colours are good (while the red does tend to clash a bit) and the rendering itself is decent. But decent isnt excellent.
Try going in close and defining some of the muscular structure, especially around the
legs and snout. This seems to be a rather vicious looking creature, so I will take a wild
guess and say its probably heavily muscled. In which case we should SEE that muscle
buckling, folding, pulling, tightening etc. Around the snout we should see wrinkles and taut muscles as the mouth pulls open. With biting power like that, it should be something along these lines:
Observe especially how the whole snout pulls back and we see not only taut muscles but wrinkled folds of skin. The teeth and raw gums should be exposed as the lips pull back, letting us see the full set.
The legs, especially that leaping front pair, should be written with creases and tendons. Something like this:
I understand the hound in question is merely standing, but its rather knobbly limbs give us a fine view of all those ripcord whiplash muscles.
I could go on the cover the wings, chest etc. In summary, the beast is far too flat and perfect. Layer its body with shadows to delineate the muscles he deserves, so fine and royal a beast is he.
Can I name it? If you are pleased, it is the Royal Jovian Griffin.
CRITIQUE AS YOU WOULD BE CRITIQUED
THE ABOVE LINK IS ALL YOU NEED
http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=200044 <- Sketchbook - filled with unhappy things.
December 17th, 2009 #3
the 'I like it but don't love it' actually sums up that feeling. friends love my art but for another bypasser on the digital galleries I'm just another person that draws 'pwetty pictures' to be forgotten after they click 'next->'
You have no idea how happy this comment made me, she originated from a rat while making her more mainstream, and I didn't notice to what refs I should be using, yeah blind much by drawing her too many times and not thinking about it >_<
Shes not 'really' a wolf but I get your point, there indeed isn't much muscle rendering going on, her body is flat, and by the looks of the length of her fur I could very well learn from the wolfs! I'm not really sure about her head, since she came from a rat, recently with dog teeth, I think it might be better to go back to referencing from rat pictures. actually I think I'm going back to the drawing board for that, but in the meanwhile I'll try to fix her head with what you said
-right click save- on the dog picture, he might be just standing there but his muscles are showing allot better then the refs I used to use.
"I could go on the cover the wings, chest etc. In summary, the beast is far too flat and perfect. Layer its body with shadows to delineate the muscles he deserves, so fine and royal a beast is he."
I will do exactly that, again thank you so much for your help and I'll get working asap and reposting! I'll also get more shortfurred dog pictures indeed
"Can I name it? If you are pleased, it is the Royal Jovian Griffin. "
theeeheee thats neath thanks xD
December 17th, 2009 #4Registered User
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Well Mordus pretty much covered everything i was going to say, except for one.
The creature is in flight, and therefore is assumed to be moving. The background is excellent, it shows movement and energy, yet the creature just seems to be floating there and thus creates a clash between the background and the subject.
I think making the two more in sync, by adding motion to the creature would help add that 'oomp'
But if that's not the point of this picture, then please disregard everything i just said XD
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December 17th, 2009 #5
Thank you greatly for your input !
EDIT: scrap that I'm gonne redo the whole tail , I think bolth the curve and the fluff is wrong :o
Last edited by SpaceRogue; December 17th, 2009 at 03:46 PM. Reason: new idea
December 17th, 2009 #6
I'll try to be concise:
Cool creature design but poorly rendered - or rendered in flat, cel manner anyway (if that's what you're after then it's fine).
There is a strong sense of light in the environment but none on the creature. The "rim light" all around doesn't make sense. The background is extremely warm - which tends to flatten the image - warm colors advance - cool colors recede.
All of the action/direction is sweeping the viwer right off the lower left corner - try reversing the background for a dynamic, countering design.
Also the POV seems odd - I assume we're above looking down as the creature is banking in flight? He seems to just be enjoying flying - which is ok - but it might add some interest if he was chasing something - a small prey creature - a feather in the wind, etc. Check out Wayne Barlowe for perhaps the best guy at creatures doing interesing/natural stuff - or Riene Poortvliet - or James Gurney. In fact, get Jame's new book "Imaginitive Realsim".
Hope it helps!
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December 17th, 2009 #7
I think the only think that's really standing out, is the fact that the environment is super saturated and still doesn't seem to have any effect on the whites of the dragon.In fact the whites look really desaturated, like b/w pencil shading that hasn't been colored yet.
Sorry about the paintover, it's the only way I could explain. I'll take it off if you don't want it It is really quick but it should make more sense than my words do.
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December 18th, 2009 #8
owe good think I came home to late to start reworking :3
That proves I'm to scared with my colors ahaaaaaa! I didn't want to hurt the white and make her orange, now I have the feeling that if I had done that it would at least be more 'into' the background D:
mk i'll be back with a result, hopefully before tomarrow
December 18th, 2009 #9
Glad it helped - nice paintover too, Iridyse. Maybe it's just me but the clouds were reading to me like sand dunes - which is why I assumed the POV was above looking down on the creature as it banks sideways over a desert. So I would suggest gathering some good sky/cloud reference - you can still push the colors but the textures, edges and forms read as too solid right now.
Good luck - looking forward to seeing the next piece!
December 18th, 2009 #10
yeah I'v been thinking about just doing clouds again via tutorials and then moving on to refs based :s
next to that I'm thinking of permanently going to use Photoshop for colors, it must be me but I can't detail in OpenCanvas for life (but it bleeeeeeend so nice and painty ) . however the lineart done in PS looks dead to me so I'll keep OC for that....
I'm going to bed but for now;
this time in photoshop, either way compression kills fur but that'll teach me for the next time
December 18th, 2009 #11
I did a tiny bit of redlining. I think that the little prey animal is a little small and too dark. It looks like it's another dragon farther away. Also, the dragon is looking up, as far as I can tell, so it doesn't look like it's seeing the little animal. Having the prey directly in front of it breaks the flow. I think the prey would tie into the picture a lot better if it followed the same flow as the dragon.
Otherwise, absolutely gorgeous. I love the lighting and paintery look to the clouds. The texture is great too.
Last edited by WhiteWingedDemon; December 18th, 2009 at 10:24 PM.I bite
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December 19th, 2009 #12
hmmm very good point about the critter looking like a distant dragon ! I'll get on it after my chores ;D