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Hi everyone, I'm going to be taking this image to a real high resolution soon and make it poster size (however it will fit on a 18" X 24" sheet) and I thought I'd pass it along to you guys first for some critique before I spend to much more time on it. First, anatomy in weird perspectives isn't my strong point so any advice (especially the soldier) would help. Also I want to know if the top of the image reads right to you all. It is supposed to look like you're looking at the underneath side of a metal air vent but the perspective seems off. Anyway, any feedback is welcomed.
Last edited by CircusRobot; November 24th, 2009 at 03:24 AM. Reason: Posted the image wrong
Ok, as you already said, the perspective isn't 100% correct, but besides that it's a really nice drawing. The focus on the hand with the slime does work, maybe add some decent white lighting to the face of the woman too, but keep the hand the spot with most intensity.
The upper part of the drawing is somewhat hard to read from first view. You can figure out some tentacles, but you have to take a closer look to discover more. But I won't say this is a disadvantage, things do not need to be that obvious all the time.
This is tough one - a dramatic perspective, dramatic lighting, hidden compositional elements. It has a lot of promise, but I think you should step back and take a good look at some of the foundational elements before detailing any more. Here are my major crits.
- The red light: Compositionally, I feel like the red light really fights the flashlight/slime part of the image. I don't even think you need the red light in there - you could lose that completely and still imply the red light coming from off screen. Right now, my eye can't escape that point and I don't think that's what you intended.
- Perspective and placement: I feel like you've lost perspective in some places. You're sort of dealing with 3 point perspective here, which can be tricky. You should go in with some perspective lines and you understand how things should be foreshortened. I feel like the soldier is the most off. He should be foreshortened a bit more, which is pretty obvious if you check him against your vertical 3rd point perspective line. Also, I feel like he's placed too high. If you look at his ankles; unless he's on higher ground than the lady, they should be standing on roughly the same plane. Also, you should go in and really look at the placement of both characters heads and facing, as I feel like they flatten out alot.
- Soldier anatomy and design: The soldiers pose feels very awkward to me, especially with his leg placement. I would do some work on his stance - play it out with your body and see how it matches up with what you've drawn. The way he's holding the gun also feels awkward - again, play it out and really look at where your shoulders and hands fall. I think in that pistol-ready stance, one arm would be the leading arm with a higher shoulder, and the support arm shoulder would be dropped a bit. Also, the design of his suit feels fairly busy around the legs and knees, detracting from the overall image. It probably wouldn't hurt to do some google searches for armor, kevlar, space suits, stuff like that, and play with the design a bit, before you lock it down.
-Monster design: I think less is better with this guy. Don't underestimate the power of a couple of glowing eyes in the dark, the hint of a tentacle, and a little slime sticking down. Right now it feels a little too busy. I would try pulling some of the tentacles, playing up the eyes, and only showing just enough to make the forms read - making him feel a little more hidden.
-Overall composition: I think you can actually make life easier for yourself and hide some of the detail you have here (especially around the guys legs). Push his legs back into shadow more, and use the red lit edges to lead the eye through the composition with a sort of "S" structure. You could also look for ways to incorporate some contrasting color into the scene, maybe play up the cool blue/white flashlight to fight all that red; just use it to tease out some of the shadowed forms in a very subtle way along the edge of his gun arm and gun side.
Anyway, there's a few thoughts. Like I said, I think you've taken on a tricky subject, which is a great challenge, and the best way to learn. Hope this helps some.
pixeleater, thanks a lot for all the feedback! I'm going to tackle some of your suggestions at a time. First I changed the soldiers position and tweaked the pose some, then I got rid of unnecesary details and tried to push the monster thing back into shadow more. I'm going to do more when I have the time.