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Thread: yo mama
September 14th, 2009 #1
Hello everyone! i think im nearly finished with this they asked me for a mermaid i hope they like it. Im looking for some critike on the pose and anatomy, i know the overall thing might be horribly discombabulated but i only have time to fix small mistakes like (HANDS ) tytytyty
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Neat. I like the subtle mechanical look you've got going on. There are a couple things I'd change, like so:
So, pushed in her face a bit, shortened her arm (too-long arms are everyone's favorite proportion error, myself included), added some foreshortening to her tail, and curved the knife (both to get it away from the edge & to balance the blade w/ the curved handle).
Since you say you're in a hurry, I'll mention this took longer to type than to do, using GIMP's IWarp tool. I think the PS equivalent is Liquify? Obviously you'd want to use it a bit more carefully than I did, and/or clean things up after, but still a very handy tool for these belated proportion/perspective tweaks.
My only other suggestion would be to play with the colors a little. Right now she matches the background a little too well, IMHO.
Last edited by Morgan_R; September 15th, 2009 at 01:38 AM.
September 15th, 2009 #3
Very cool Mermaid, I would have to agree that I like the armored look. I am also digging the distortion of the background for the water. There are some points though that I think could use some improvements. The light bounce on the far upper right part of her main fin looks to similar to that of that one next to it and I think varying it a little more could help that. At this point in time the texture of her human like skin is very rough and I would love to see a more smooth texture to contrast with her rough armor; I also think that her breasts could use more refining. Her pose feels a little static to me but I was thinking what if you had her left hand side forearm and hand in a foreshortened pose like she was resisting the water with her hand.
BTW, my first impression of this when I saw it was, "You know with a little cropping this would make an awesome bookmark"
Anyways hope that helps.
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September 15th, 2009 #4
Great morgan thank you so much! you hit the nail right on the head her face was way too long XD n so was her arm im also going to work a little on the knife to bring a little harmony to the curve. Ito, thanks man im going to try to change her hand because it is a bit to still right now and i see where your coming from it would give it more lively look.
September 15th, 2009 #5
September 16th, 2009 #6
Looks like a good start! One thing I would definitely work on is the color. I would put in some soft warm colors and maybe even some other cool colors to bring up some visual interest. Also if your point of view extends slightly above the sea level I would make that more clear. It looks like there's a tiny sliver of sky at the top of the frame.
The last big thing I would do is add some depth to the scene. I don't think the backgrounds competing with the foreground yet but putting some solid depth in it would help separate the space.
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September 17th, 2009 #7Master Belittler
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Not to be devils advocate, but I know thats how this will sound. I like the cleanliness and design of the overall composition. The huge "buttshell" she's wearing looks too high up and seems to inhibit her ability to maneuver smoothly and the tail flukes look way too haevy for such a thin tail stem to support. It almost seems like it has elephantitus or club foot disease.
Other than that, it is a very professional piece, thats just how it feels to me.
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September 17th, 2009 #8
Maybe it's just me, but her breasts look a little high and there's no real hang to them. They seem to be crowding her collarbone a bit, where they should be well clear of it. I also agree with patrick2k1, the very thick buttshell/thin tail/large flukes does look a bit awkward and doesn't look like it would have much strength.The Nezumi Works Sketchbook - Now in progress
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