Almost completed
Join the #1 Art Workshop - LevelUpJoin Premium Art Workshop

Results 1 to 26 of 26

Thread: Almost completed

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0

    Almost completed

    Hey everyone

    I'm still working on this piece but i was hoping to get some feedback so far. Im probably going to end up changing her face or expression, it's not really sitting well with me. Anyway thanks.

    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    75
    Thanks
    13
    Thanked 13 Times in 13 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Her face and headdress are my favourite bits of this piece...

    I will say that I didn't notice the eyes in her hair for the longest time. Perhaps make them more obvious by varying their tone with that of the hair?

    sketchbook

    I want to be a writer when I grow up.

    My first book is going on sale in 2011!
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  3. #3
    FourTonMantis's Avatar
    FourTonMantis is offline Without vision we will die Level 11 Gladiator: Essedarii
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    1,774
    Thanks
    768
    Thanked 769 Times in 340 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    I love this piece. Pastoral weirdness. I'm surprised you didn't notice the eyes, ataxas. They were the first thing I noticed.

    I think the face is great as is.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to FourTonMantis For This Useful Post:


  5. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    75
    Thanks
    13
    Thanked 13 Times in 13 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Well, I stated that sort of inaccurately, my bad. At first I read them as glass beads rather than as eyes, because they're exactly the same colour palette as her hair, because they're oversized, and because the pupils are so dilated.

    I like the narrative - if that's the right word - of the piece much better now that it's clicked.

    Also please don't change the expression on her face! I agree, it's great as-is.

    Last edited by ataxas; August 20th, 2009 at 03:25 AM. Reason: grammar psychosis
    sketchbook

    I want to be a writer when I grow up.

    My first book is going on sale in 2011!
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to ataxas For This Useful Post:


  7. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    753
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 62 Times in 58 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    The expression is fine, I agree. Very weird piece overall - in a cool and interesting way, that is. The hair swirls MOST wonderfully. Although I noticed the eyes pretty quickly, they really aren't reading as eyelike as they should...they're looking quite soft around the edges, so it might be nice to firm them up a little, and perhaps introduce some true highlights.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Datameister For This Useful Post:


  9. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Madrid, Spain
    Posts
    1,693
    Thanks
    3,149
    Thanked 662 Times in 490 Posts
    Follows
    1
    Following
    0
    I really like the piece. I think theat it could use some more contrast or some true highlights. For me her body and face do not stand out too much, as the hair does.

    Great piece

    気計 - Quike
    "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.."

    The Spaniard's Sketchbook... No holds barred
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to Quike Garcia For This Useful Post:


  11. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    75
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 16 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to Smellypunks For This Useful Post:


  13. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    same place as ever
    Posts
    2,151
    Thanks
    222
    Thanked 693 Times in 466 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    It's painted very well, i love those hands, good expression on the face as well. Not sure about the composition though. It's good that the swirl of the hair leads up to the faces, but i have this vague feeling that something needs to balance that whole mass on the lower part of the pic. I could just be talking out of my fundoshi mind you.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to walnut For This Useful Post:


  15. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    753
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 62 Times in 58 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    I disagree. I think the composition is one of this painting's many strong points.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to Datameister For This Useful Post:


  17. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Alameda, CA
    Posts
    456
    Thanks
    105
    Thanked 51 Times in 42 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Leave the face, I like it. Great piece, don't over cook it, start your next masterpiece! Love the light, color, eyes in the hair fantastic. Maybe a slight halo of light behind her head, sun/yellow, would help the space behind her not be so flat.

    Really good job!
    ~M

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  18. The Following User Says Thank You to markwagner For This Useful Post:


  19. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Thanks everyone for the feedback, it was very much appreciated. I was really expecting responses saying that her expression was off, but I guess i have just been staring at it too long. I'll clean the eyes up a bit more and a few other things and post it back up in the finished section. Thanks again.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  20. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    200
    Thanks
    57
    Thanked 48 Times in 42 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    This is very Cool ^_^ but why is she pointing out of the bottom right corner?

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  21. The Following User Says Thank You to Kitten Poker For This Useful Post:


  22. #13
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Her hand wasnt supposed to be pointing towards anything, I guess the pose of it just looked liked it. Thanks for mentioning it though, I never really noticed that. I'll try and change it a bit.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  23. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    753
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 62 Times in 58 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Well, her expression is certainly weird, but appropriately so. Like you said, you've probably just been looking at it too long. If I were you, I'd firm up the eyeballs, add some clearer highlights on them, and then call it quits! It's lookin' good.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  24. The Following User Says Thank You to Datameister For This Useful Post:


  25. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    712
    Thanks
    140
    Thanked 191 Times in 184 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    This is great. I agree that you're just about done here; maybe some stronger lights overall would help, but as it is it stands well.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  26. The Following User Says Thank You to Tangleworm For This Useful Post:


  27. #16
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    1,542
    Thanks
    1,030
    Thanked 517 Times in 295 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Great job on the hands and the skin, and I love your colors. I do agree that a stronger light source would help the image a lot. The fabric on her dress also look less finished comparing to the beautifully painted skin and background.

    Used some overlay layers to do a couple of quick paint-overs, with different lighting schemes. Where is the light coming from? What color is the light? Which direction is the light going?

    This is shaping up to be a very strong image. Can't wait to see it finished

    Attached Images Attached Images    
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  28. The Following User Says Thank You to Nightblue For This Useful Post:


  29. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Adelaide Australia
    Posts
    185
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 31 Times in 30 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    if you make the image smaller it kind of looks like the hair is an octopus coming to get the girl. I think the hair needs some more work, perhaps a bit of softness and some hightlights. The girl looks great but its hard to determine some of the shapes because the light values are so low. I think it needs some more highlights to determine where the eyes should look

    My coffee is never strong enough and sleep is always an option
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  30. The Following User Says Thank You to Leggraphics For This Useful Post:


  31. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    100
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 26 Times in 25 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    I've got to say I prefer the cooler image more...less mood, but adds focus to the face and headdress (which are exquisite) instead of the alarmingly warm light in the hair. No real crits though...very well done!

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  32. The Following User Says Thank You to Psychotrope For This Useful Post:


  33. #19
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Just to address the lighting issue people are asking about: What I originally intended was for it to be a cloudy late afternoon . The light source is coming from behind her, dimly making its way through the clouds in the centre of the picture. I did consider a stronger light source shining through in the beginning, but I've done paintings of that sort before so I was trying to avoid it in favor of something different. I also wanted to avoid drowning out any of the details with too much light and lens flares and stuff, and with a stronger lightsource I figured I would have to darken the shaded side even more.

    So in the end I settled with a cloudy afternoon with low light values, whilst trying to balance detail visibility with a recognizeable light source in the background. Also to give it a different kind of feel I wanted an overall greenish sort of tint to the whole thing to contrast with the red hair.

    I'm pretty happy with how it ended up, but I agree that some adjustments can be made. Thank you all for the feedback, I really appreciate your help.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  34. #20
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Nightblue - I really liked the second lighting effect you added and you're right about the lack of detail in the dress. I hope to get some time to fix these up this weekend and repost. Thanks!

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  35. #21
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Dallas, Texas
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    51
    Thanked 24 Times in 15 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Heres an updated version. I hope the light source is a little more readable now. I may call this one finished. I've been working on it for a while now and theres only so much I can do for so long before my nose starts bleeding and I fall to the floor . Any additional feedback would be great.

    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  36. #22
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    75
    Thanks
    13
    Thanked 13 Times in 13 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    It's beautiful.

    Is there any way for you to squeeze more detail into the dress?

    sketchbook

    I want to be a writer when I grow up.

    My first book is going on sale in 2011!
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  37. The Following User Says Thank You to ataxas For This Useful Post:


  38. #23
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Alameda, CA
    Posts
    456
    Thanks
    105
    Thanked 51 Times in 42 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    YES on flipping the image - bravo!

    ~M

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  39. The Following User Says Thank You to markwagner For This Useful Post:


  40. #24
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    489
    Thanks
    4
    Thanked 45 Times in 45 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    Truly amazing!!! Although I think the eyes get lost a little...

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  41. #25
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    101
    Thanks
    28
    Thanked 21 Times in 16 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    This is really gorgeous, and I think you'd be completely justified in calling it done. My only suggestion would be to maybe try tinting the eyes greenish, if you want them to stand out from the hair a bit more.

    Looking at your portfolio, I really like all of your concepts and compositions, but in many cases the lighting and rendering isn't quite as perfectly polished as this piece is. I don't mean to be hyper-critical, but since it seems like you're looking for work, you might spend a bit of time refining some of those older pieces. A portfolio is only as strong as its weakest image... and since I really like your stuff, I'd love to see you get paid to do more of it.

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

  42. #26
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    277
    Thanks
    59
    Thanked 153 Times in 98 Posts
    Follows
    0
    Following
    0
    It's just a small thing, but for me the central bulk of the hair has too much, well, bulk. It's so dark it reads as extremely thick and heavy and as such shouldn't have so much movement in it, it should be weighing her down more. I think if you let a teeny bit of light filter through especially in that lower middle section it will make a big difference.

    Hope that is helpful in some way.

    Cheers

    D'Arcy

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote  

Members who have read this thread: 0

There are no members to list at the moment.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •