View Poll Results: Which composition do you prefer?

Voters
6. You may not vote on this poll
  • Comp1 - small moon

    1 16.67%
  • Comp2 - big E.T. moon

    2 33.33%
  • Comp3 - no moon

    3 50.00%
Results 1 to 26 of 26
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Composition HELP

    What's up Dudes and Dudettes? I pleaded for some aid with this in my sketchbook thread but there were no takers, so I'm hoping people are a bit more helpful in here. I'm working on a new digital painting and I've moved from initial sketches to my thumbnail sketch on to my final composition. I'm having some trouble deciding what to do with the moon, so I'd love some input. Thanks!

    Comp 1. Little crescent moon creating a sort of inverted pyramid effect.
    Composition HELP
    Comp 2. Big E.T. moon.
    Composition HELP
    Comp 3. No moon.
    Composition HELP


  2. Hide this ad by registering as a member
  3. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    170
    Thanks
    52
    Thanked 30 Times in 29 Posts
    i like the 2nd one the best. Im assuming the whole image is going to be dark, unless a secondary light source. So it will put the attention more on the characters. Though your characters will more or less be silhouettes. But i think you could add a real cool affect with it.

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Kadath
    Posts
    746
    Thanks
    96
    Thanked 139 Times in 130 Posts
    What if you had the girl half way in front of the Moon on the left hand side, maybe even bursting out of the trees, and the bird ahead of her maybe even just past the Moon, so the bird shows up better from contrast. If you arranged it like that it would create an arcing directional line like she was chasing or racing the bird and also give a sense of motion.

    Hope that helps.

    Imagination is not a total internal power but rather it is a reflection and multi-faceted projection of our experiences and knowledge. We take in information from the world around us and intuitively re-order it into something new. Something is not created from nothing but simply transformed from what was before.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Thanks guys - helpful words both.

    Ito - Some backstory is in order. The bird is actually the girl transformed, thus the girl in the sky is more symbolic than literal, and in the final she'll appear semi-transparent. The bird and the girl are thus one and the same, so a "chase" wouldn't make narrative sense.

    My wife liked the E.T.-moon also, so I guess Comp 2 is leading the competition... I dig the image of the white bird against the dark sky, however, which is why Comp1 was my initial concept. Eh, I still can't decide.

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Orlando
    Posts
    489
    Thanks
    293
    Thanked 200 Times in 132 Posts
    If you do go with the E.T. moon, watch out for the tangent between the edge of the moon and the girl's fingers. The arc of her hair and the edge of the moon is also a problem spot.

    Are we looking up at them? The trees sort of look like they're in perspective, but the figures are viewed as a straight on profile.

    Maybe the narrative will be clearer once this is colored and the girl is transparent. But it may also help if the bird and the girl were in the same pose.
    "Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it" -- Confucius

    "Imagination is more important than knowledge" -- Albert Einstein


    Pixelestial's Gallery

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    712
    Thanks
    140
    Thanked 191 Times in 184 Posts
    I agree with Soulweaver in that a similar pose for the two characters would convey that message better. Maybe having the girl fade out of the bird would help too.

    Of these three, the ET moon is my favorite. With the small moon, everything's avoiding each other, and with no moon, it would be hard to get the lighting right.
    I think you can go even better than that, though, if you move the moon down a bit so the bird and the girl are the highest up in the picture frame, and so that the trees break up the moon's outline a bit. You could also make it a bit less centered, too, and make the frame taller than it is wide, to emphasize height.

    I like the style here. It's coherent and appropriately stylized.

  8. #7
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Hudson River valley, NY
    Posts
    16,202
    Thanks
    4,875
    Thanked 16,685 Times in 5,021 Posts
    Definitely not #1.
    I rather like the no moon option. And it emphasizes the oddness of the white raven, which would be harder to get across against the glow of the moon. If you do go with #2, play around with the moon's size, and how the two characters interact with its shape.
    I think some of the crits are getting caught up in narrative trivialities, when the formal stylization of the composition makes it clear that it's a conceptual piece.
    Last edited by Elwell; August 10th, 2009 at 10:33 PM.

    Tristan Elwell
    **Finished Work Thread **Process Thread **Edges Tutorial

    "Work is more fun than fun."
    -John Cale

    "Art is supposed to punch you in the brain, and it's supposed to stay punched."
    -Marc Maron

  9. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Wow, this has all been really really helpful. Thanks so much to everyone.
    I just whipped up another mock-up, so once again, reaction is appreciated.

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Kadath
    Posts
    746
    Thanks
    96
    Thanked 139 Times in 130 Posts
    Didn't know about the backstory, but this last idea is working a little better. The one thing that is concerning me is how centered it is so if you cropped it so that it was more off center it would help out a lot. I like the thumbnail moon, might suggest having that kind of moon even larger, even half hidden by the trees and see how that feels.

    Imagination is not a total internal power but rather it is a reflection and multi-faceted projection of our experiences and knowledge. We take in information from the world around us and intuitively re-order it into something new. Something is not created from nothing but simply transformed from what was before.

  11. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Thanks Ito. I'm not positive I agree on the importance of having my focal point off-center. In fact, for this particular piece, I think I much prefer it dead-centered. but here's another version to chew on.
    Attachment 748736

  12. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    101
    Thanks
    28
    Thanked 21 Times in 16 Posts
    Nice. Definitely a good choice for the moon. I hate to say it, since I really like the girl's pose, but I do think a more typical arms-out 'flying' pose would convey the girl-as-bird idea more clearly... alternately, what about adding a bit of a tree branch that the bird could be launching from? Just a thought, depending on how concerned you are with getting that idea across. As an image, I think it's working fine.

    Although if you're going to crop it, you might try moving the bird and/or girl so they're not quite so vertically aligned with each other... it just looks a bit awkward when they aren't also centered.

  13. #12
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Hudson River valley, NY
    Posts
    16,202
    Thanks
    4,875
    Thanked 16,685 Times in 5,021 Posts
    Definitely centered.

    Tristan Elwell
    **Finished Work Thread **Process Thread **Edges Tutorial

    "Work is more fun than fun."
    -John Cale

    "Art is supposed to punch you in the brain, and it's supposed to stay punched."
    -Marc Maron

  14. #13
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Thanks for your input Tristan. Do you like the large crescent moon option or are you still partial to no moon at all?

  15. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Denver, Colorado USA
    Posts
    167
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 44 Times in 44 Posts
    If your going to center the image CROP IT to the focal point. A hint of the trees from below will serve your purpose. Right now - the most interesting part is the top half. The trees taking the bottom half doesn't help the piece it only distracts.

  16. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Fallingwater
    Posts
    5,081
    Thanks
    1,529
    Thanked 5,192 Times in 1,728 Posts
    Shrink the figure and the bird slightly so it doesn't form a tangent with the crescent. This is looking promising.
    At least Icarus tried!


    My Process: Dead Rider Graphic Novel (Dark Horse Comics) plus oil paintings, pencils and other goodies:
    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...d.php?t=101106

    My "Smilechild" Music. Plus a medley of Commercial Music Cues and a Folksy Jingle!:
    http://www.myspace.com/kevferrara

  17. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Thanks again for everyone's input! I think the below is what I'm going to run with.

  18. #17
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Hudson River valley, NY
    Posts
    16,202
    Thanks
    4,875
    Thanked 16,685 Times in 5,021 Posts
    Looking good. You might want to swing the top of the crescent up around her head.

    Tristan Elwell
    **Finished Work Thread **Process Thread **Edges Tutorial

    "Work is more fun than fun."
    -John Cale

    "Art is supposed to punch you in the brain, and it's supposed to stay punched."
    -Marc Maron

  19. #18
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    712
    Thanks
    140
    Thanked 191 Times in 184 Posts
    Great work.
    I think you could forward the momentum more if the bird's wing was more horizontal, sweeping backwards. Just a bit will do.

  20. #19
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Many thanks to all - this has been really really helpful. I tweaked the composition some more and started laying down some rudimentary colors and values. I'd like to work some more on the left-hand foliage, but it'll have to wait until tomorrow.

  21. #20
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Update.

    I've been updating this in my sketchbook, but I thought I'd post an update here as well. I had to tuck it away entirely for about a week, but I've gotten back to work today.
    Composition HELP

  22. #21
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

  23. #22
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    My values were getting a bit muddy so I had to sort them out. I really like how the moon is coming along. I think this is nearly finished.

  24. #23
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Hmmmmmmm

    I was very close to calling this one finished...
    Attachment 759153

    Then I wondered if perhaps I made a mistake cropping my subjects so tightly...
    Attachment 759156

    So now I'm not sure what to think. Opinions welcome!

  25. #24
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    232
    Thanks
    180
    Thanked 45 Times in 43 Posts
    the dark part of the moon should be bluish as well. where's the bird's second wing,claw? its flight pose is icorrect. the claws should be tucked in partially and pulled back.
    The crop works

  26. #25
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Thanks Prince. Think of the raven as bi-sectioned, haha. I actually like the flat depth of field it gives the scene - it's an effect I've been experimenting a lot with lately.

    I'm calling this finished... for now.
    Composition HELP
    Composition HELP
    Last edited by JeffZNY; August 22nd, 2009 at 11:24 PM.

  27. #26
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    nyc
    Posts
    768
    Thanks
    10
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Revisions...

    I really thought this was done... but I was wrong. While I really loved the rendering in the original version, stepping back for a few days I realized that I lost the "story" somewhere along the way. Hey, it happens. Here's the new version, which I think does a much better job of conveying the protagonist's metamorphosis. Thanks for looking!
    Composition HELP

Similar Threads

  1. Need help with Composition
    By Lumaris in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: September 17th, 2010, 10:54 PM
  2. Art: Composition
    By Erin_Something in forum Fine Art
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: September 12th, 2010, 01:26 AM
  3. Value/Composition Help
    By Fuseboy in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: August 26th, 2009, 09:46 AM
  4. Composition
    By anastasky in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: May 10th, 2009, 12:30 AM
  5. Help with the composition
    By dux in forum Art Critique Center
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: December 17th, 2004, 08:54 PM

Members who have read this thread: 0

There are no members to list at the moment.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Designed by The Coldest Water, we build the coldest best water bottles, ice packs and best pillows.