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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Perth, Western Australia
    Thanked 189 Times in 97 Posts

    Lightbulb Beginning Entry: 2.64 MB of imagery

    fistly i would like to say hello to all the artists who have decided to take a gander at my Newborn WIP, and to say a preemptive thanks to those willing to give any Critiques to help me improve the Piece.

    So this is my Entry i have been working pretty solid on for a while now.
    But things keep bugging me about it, there seems to be very little or no depth, and there seems to be problems with focal points and areas in which to interest the viewer's eye.

    i have an irking problem with the central figure, the anatomy of the shoulders and chest area seems slightly off, and the mass of the figure does not seem to "move in a way that seems "right".

    i may have re-shuffle the composition in order to get something better but i wanted to get the opinion of you fine folks at CA first just to see what others think what could be done.

    But enough of my Rambling, please----what do YOU think?

    From Start 'til Now:
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  3. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Thanked 1,860 Times in 604 Posts
    The figure looks too bright, so much so the details are becoming lost. The figure does need to be the focus but that doesn't mean it all needs to be so overpowering. I like the values of the head and "hair" in #8, although you still need to tone down the body and TV. Maybe make the screen bigger, having it stretch as he pushes through it. Make him transparent but clearly defined, like a ghost.

    Some of his glow could reflect - subtly! - on the ground and little people, and the TV frame, and the rest of the scene would fade off into darkness. The people could have shadows indicating he is the light source. ATM the shadows in the background don't really match anything.

  4. #3
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Santa Clara, CA
    Thanked 142 Times in 115 Posts
    I agree with Baron, your figure is losing a lot of detail, and the colors that end up in his shadowed areas look like they've gone negative. You had some nice detail in the muscles but that is all gone now. Also I'd think more about your composition. Its very flat and straight on right now, and when theres no perspective in a picture it can get boring. I like your first thumbnail, it looks like you were going for that when you first started. You also have way too much negative space everywhere. You might be planning on using it, but if not, you should think about changing it up. Also, be careful that you dont start just slapping color everywhere. Think about what you want the piece to say, the mood you want to convey. Is this a happy inspirational piece? Or is this thing emerging and taking over? Are you bleeding color into the world? On the surface its easy to see what your idea is, but you should go deeper. Keep going! Its a great start!

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    At the dorms at SCAD
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts
    And I concur with the others. The colors are way too distracting because they are so saturated. I almost like the black and white version better - it almost gives a sense of something more mechanical - at least to me. But also lessening the saturation and making the figure more transparent may also help for him to not overpower the composition. ^^

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Las Vegas
    Thanked 4 Times in 4 Posts
    So it's a guy coming out of a TV? I'm not getting much of a maternal connection between the guy and the TV in your composition. I would thumbnail out some other ideas before putting in as much time as you have with the rendering and the color.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Thanked 9 Times in 9 Posts
    ummm......very andrew jones-y...................the colors are very saturated n dont look cohesive... great idea tho.... keep going... its a great start!

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