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July 22nd, 2008 #1
I need critics on this finished painting (nudity) *FINISHED VERSION*
I've just finished reworking this painting and I would like to receive some critics from you to correct the errors I cannot notice since I draw it.
I have had many great constructive crits for the last one so I would really appreciate any constructive critic and help by you for this one too.
Thank you very much for your time.
Last edited by Theking78; August 3rd, 2008 at 07:13 AM. Reason: updated image
Hide this ad by registering as a memberJuly 22nd, 2008 #2
I like your work with colour and light on this, very nicely done. One eye is hard to be expressive with. I don't see anything glaringly wrong with it, maybe her hair in the back could be a little higher or a little more defined?
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July 22nd, 2008 #3I am here to learn
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I am not an expert but i cant see mistakes or something wrong. one day I coul draw so. That is a nice pic.
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July 22nd, 2008 #4Registered User
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Some nice realistic touches on here. Good wood texture and nice sail. Nice sexy outfit. I like the dynamic symmetry of the sail, but the composition still looks a bit too posed/symmetrical to me. I understand you were going for a some kind of iconic old school illustrators thing, but the wheel is just attaching to her shoulders, rather than staying in the background. It looks like she is lifting the wheel on her shoulders. So the design isn't quite designed enough to be a good "iconic" design, but it is close.
This reminds me of cheesecake, but lacks a sense of fun and innocence. The moment is way over the top unbelievable and doesn't really have an emotional tone. There's no mystery here, no mood. Just a pose... The face she is making seems more related to a porn face than a drama face. Other anatomy issues: Her left boob seems to be lacking in form, and the hair doesn't quite look like hair, looks like red snakes... the eye patch seems too big and placed too high. The color of her skin is also monotonous. There's no cool to warm contrast, no pink versus orange versus yellow. Check out Gil Elvgren to see how he achieves softness in the skin and hair and how he uses innocence to make the girls sexier. And how he arranges his compositions and how he uses perspective.
When you put a 21st century porn star on a 17th century pirate ship, you really have to work hard to blend the two together. Otherwise it looks like "hey, he painted a porn star on a pirate ship." which ruins the reality of the moment.
Google "Gil Elvgren"
At least Icarus tried!
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July 22nd, 2008 #5
A lot of good effort put into this... but your main character is naked.. why?
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July 22nd, 2008 #6Registered User
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Nice Work! Your balance of details may be throwing the eye off. The woman is naturally a smooth surface and the ship is naturally a rough surface... Both of them rendered at the same level of "focus" and colour makes the woman look like she isnt finished maybe? If you differentiate more between the background and your subject, add depth to the image, it may "pop" better. I also think the hair is rendered too flat. Perhaps add some depth to that as well? When I say depth I mean near and far from the "camera" .
Other than that I cant see anything wrong with it. Keep up the good work!
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July 22nd, 2008 #7
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July 23rd, 2008 #8
her hair and nipples in particular look very "fuzzy", try using a harder edged brush. also the thin bright highlight on the right side of her face (our left) looks weird.
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July 23rd, 2008 #9
i would definitely put some more work in the hair. it kind gives the suggestion to me that she has dreds. also i agree with above mentioned crits. keep up the great work!
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July 23rd, 2008 #10
You've done an absolutely beautiful job on the ship's wheel. Pity there's a naked woman in front of it.
Not being a smartass: the way you've got the light hitting the flat of the wood on the left (at 9 o'clock) but hitting the edge of the wood on the right (at 3 o'clock) is perfect. Can I have mine with more pirate?
I was once on the receiving end of a critique so savagely nasty, I marched straight out of class to the office and changed my major (sketchbook).
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July 23rd, 2008 #11
I agree with the others about the hair (it needs some more work) and the wheel as well. the wheel really not some object in the background, it's a frame behind the girl, too close and damn well rendered... I am the typ who can enjoy the beauty of a female body (though I don't like those too-round silicon boobs too much, but it's not important ), but the wheel is fighting with the naked babe for my attention, it's too nice and detailed.
the gal's right little finger seems to be awkward to me.
some hairlocks have too sharp angles and the wrinkles at the nose are too simple and hard, I think... bit I don't want to be too nitpicking and I may be wrong.
so this picture isn't perfect, but I would be really glad if I could produce such rendering quality in the not too far future
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July 24th, 2008 #12
Thank you to everybody who's criticized this one.
Here are some updates I did:
I blurred the bg, redo the hairs, diminished the dimension of the eye patch and worked on the left boob.
Please let me know if it's better now.
July 24th, 2008 #13
Her left nipple seems kind of indistinct and unformed, especially as compared to her other nipple. I think her hair on her left side needs maybe a little more highlights. Other than that, I really like this piece, and I'd love to see more.
Check out my sketchbook
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