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May 6th, 2008 #1
Some 8-legged Compositional Help?
Hey guys, I'm trying to put characters in environments more and get better with composition - with that said, could anyone share some thoughts on this WIP? I wanna say it's about 75% done before I move on to the texture phase but I want my shapes to be strong and effective before polishing.
A quick note: because it is part of a series, the canvas size is fixed, so I can't lengthen or widen it. I think it's better to work within constraints like that anyway
Thanks for looking!
Hide this ad by registering as a memberMay 6th, 2008 #2
Personaly its frightining to give critt to such a good artist as you . But i think the mountain in the background has a to high value compare to the sand in the foreground, which means you loose alot of depth in the image, and it gets a bit flat due to that.
May 6th, 2008 #3
Hey Steph! That's real cute.
As for shapes:
The right-most overlapping tentacle doesn't read immediately. It looks almost like a core shadow on it's head until you notice the top bit. Every other tentacle you have little suckers on - maybe adding a couple will make it stand out more readily? Also - the tentacle that is coming up past his face on the right side (the one the same colour as his head)... just personal opinion, but maybe it's a little too close? give just a little more negative space between them?
Otherwise, looks like it's coming along nicely.
Hope you're well~ < 3
May 6th, 2008 #4
i second Gundersen on the "oh noes I can't crit Steph" fear ;-;, but looking at it, the standalone purple of the sand dune on the right is bothersome... also, I loved that she's stepping on his tentacle xD but I didn't notice it until i read Daestwen's crit about it, maybe that's not too good?
...and if one tentacle is that long... aren't the others a bit too short in comparison? ._.; alrite now I'm just nitpicking I wanna see this done plz!!
May 6th, 2008 #5
Dudes, there are glaring weaknesses in my work just like everyone else on the boards, please don't ever be afraid to point them out! Srsly.
Gundersen: Good call on the mountain, one of my goals is to get some depth with this piece and I think you're right, it could be lightened up and receded even more. Thank you for pointing it out!
daestwen: I see what you mean about that tentacle misreading as a shadow. I will futz with the values but I also was planning on handling most of the shadows in this piece with a chalk brush in Photoshop - hopefully that will help to clarify it even more. I will also give a little more care to the other tentacle you mentioned and thanks for your concern about me; I am doing better than I was a month ago and I've got some new direction for work and otherwise. *hugs*
petitemistress: I think the fact that you couldn't tell she was stepping on a tentacle right away is sort of what I was going for - you don't quite realize her predicament, kinda like how she's oblivious to it too. I think you're spot on about the other tentacles needing to be a little longer to reflect that one she's stepping on, I might try making the tips of the distant tentacles more curly-queued and overlapping on themselves to get more mileage out of the limited space I have. Thank you so much for offering the feedback!
I will post an update as soon as I can - if anyone else wants to chime in I would be stoked
May 6th, 2008 #6
Hi Steph, I think it is the perspective, he seems very far away from her because of the left mountain thus making the testicle look very long compared to where he is in the back. Your so cute!! Kelly
May 6th, 2008 #7
May 7th, 2008 #8
May 7th, 2008 #9
The tentacle furthest back is very very light, much lighter than the sky. Given the color of the octopus as defined by his head, I don't see how the tentacle could get that color due to atmospheric perspective. As it goes back it should get closer to the color of the atmosphere (sky), not just get lighter.
I made a greyscale version of your image. I think if you made the octopus darker to begin with (he's already very close to the value of the sky) you'd have more room to get the effect you are looking for without lightening that far tentacle so much.
May 7th, 2008 #10
Wow! Oopsie Sigmund shrink day or what! But knowing Steph -- Perfect slip up!! Any how it's all about perspective in all forms areas of live I guess huh??? But pretty funny typo! Kelly
May 7th, 2008 #11Registered User
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i find the sea spray a bit distracting because it isn't as paper-cutoutish as the rest of the peice. i suggest making it a bit more bubbly or something. ;o
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