LMS3 round 1 entry

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  1. #1
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    LMS3 round 1 entry

    Hello pips.

    I sent this in for round 1 with just a couple of tweaks added to it like more contrast and a couple of shadows here and there.

    Here's the concept if anyone's interested:

    I always loved the story of the Elephant Man and this piece was inspired by that. I thought the idea of that story fit the challenge's topic perfectly.

    "Monasteriense" is latin for monster (says google ;P) This piece is about superficial beauty and how easy it is for most of us to condemn and brand those who are ugly in our eyes. We don't realize that those we look upon as monsters also appreciate and desire beauty. That's what the butterfly in the picture symbolizes. The "monster" itself is made to look like it is coming out of it's cocoon and we are just about to witness it's true beauty hidden within. The true monsters in the picture are the ones outside the cage.


    Feel free to rip it apart... Thanks!

    LMS3 round 1 entry

    Last edited by jbballaran; January 27th, 2008 at 01:46 AM.
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  3. #2
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    I don't think I can crit this piece yet, but I think it's an awesome piece in both lighting and emotion. What does that sign over there mean? It interest me but the word "m" is hidden. Mind putting it a little bit higher for me to see?

    The butterfly isn't obvious until I read your description. Perhaps put him near the cageman may help

    http://jsiu123.deviantart.com - my experiment gallone, enjoy
    http://jsiu123.deviantart.com/gallery/#_browse/scraps - deviant sketch untidy

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  4. #3
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    Hey dude great effort put forth on this one : )

    I'm not certain how much referance was used here (I'm assuming you used some referance and a good deal imagination) but I can tell that you
    aren't intimately familiar with all the nuances of human form yet (sheeet... who is?). I particularly notice this in all jointed areas (elbow, knuckles, wrist etc). Areas with a crease also seem "guessed". If you aren't positive about an area, why not use some help from further referance or studying what makes a particular area look a certain way and commiting it to memory? It's just laziness if you settle for not knowing and fudging through it because in the end everyone will be able to tell that it looks "off" (even if they don't know why). And if you did have a referance, it doesn't seem faithful to what you were looking at (I'm speeking specifically about the human half of the monster).

    In my opinion, I feel like the monsters face looks too silly
    and cartoony to feel much empathy for him. I think it's the
    droopy gigantic eyelids and "sad mouth" that makes it feel that way.


    One last thought... I think the characters in the background could have been worked out a lot better. I don't think it comes from your painting as much as the drawing you painted on top of. Alot of the faces look rushed into the coloring stage before really pushing the expression and shapes in the under drawing.

    All in all, I think most of the problems come from not observing stuff carefully enough.

    Keep on pushin brutha.

    NYSA grand national champion yogurt slinger - 1874-2061

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