Art: New self portrait
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Thread: New self portrait

  1. #1
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  2. #2
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    I'm looking for a good critique of this image if anyone will offer one. I really like this image and it's look, but I might want to know about potential flaws in composition,color concept or design.

    -satat

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  3. #3
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    the hands are a bit confusing for me

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  4. #4
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    kay,

    the "camera as a voice" concept (? - I am not too familiar with latin, but I guess that's the point you are trying to make?) is not clear enough... I doubt I would have ever stumbled over this part of the image without the title... which, ironically, negates the message, because the image as such remained a bit silent, if you know what I mean...


    technicalities:

    the eyes are slightly out of focus (or out of the DOF... depends on how you look at it) and this is always slightly disturbing for me unless you really push the face way back into the region where everything becomes impressionist bokeh dots.

    I realize the eye of the camera should/could serve as a substitute, but it's not working for me, I guess. And then, it is supposed to be the mouth rather than the eye, isn't it?

    Possible Remedies:
    - same point-of-view, but bigger f-stop to make the DOF include the face/eyes

    - smaller f-stop and even shallower DOF, arms held out more to increase distance between face and camera and higher focal length (supports the idea of shallow DOF) taken from a point of view which gives a similar alignment of items in the frame.


    Colours:
    Are the colours of the face and the wall meant to match? If yes, you succeeded - although I don't know what for, exactly...

    moreover, the tiny purple strand in the hair is being emphasized by the simultaneous color contrast between yellow and purple. Again, I am not sure if you wanted it to be that way and to what end you might have used that.

    So, as concerns color concept: Either go for a more considerate choice of contrasts or do it in b/w... I was thinking that the forms are more important than the colours in this shot, anyway.

    Why I take the time to write this up:

    - firstly, you asked for it, LOL...

    - more importantly, I like this image, too. It has a certain appeal, but it does not hammer it home to me like it should. Unlike eazym, I absolutely adore the pose of the hands around the camera.
    So, you could have a beautiful shot of a complex hand pose and a camera with a blurred face in the bg (somewhat neglecting the title)

    ...or you could go for the inital concept, get rid of the color contrasts, do it in b/w and large DOF.

    (nother thought... a downright manipulated morphed photoshop crazed thing would work here, too... just an idea.)

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  5. #5
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    I have not read whats been said above me but i would suggest a wider color ranger though out the photo. your background and skin tones, as well as your hair are all of the same color range. The main issue with the photo however is that the focus is on your hands and you have a larger DOF than i usaly like for potrates. Your fase should be in focus not your camera?

    Unless i suppose you wanted it like that?

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  6. #6
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    well, I did want the camera to be more of the sharp part of the image. I work with what I can get though, especially with that kind of camera, my Nikon didn't work for that concept.

    The concept I was going for is a bit tough to pull off, it's a bit strange I suppose. I did want my face to be a little more blurry and abstract looking.

    The hand pose was intentional, however intentionally making unreadable amorphic hands can be a bit jarring to some I imagine.

    The color scheme is intentionally simple, also it's what I had to work with mostly since this is a flashless shot in my bathroom mirror lol.

    I do like my eyes a bit because they look a bit lifeless, I'm really into trying to capture the uncanny valley with real people. I like the disturbing look of slight artificiality in a mostly normal human looking form.

    thanks for the crit. I'm going to go look at what it looks like more desaturated.


    -satat

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  7. #7
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    heres just a version I was playing around with for a few minutes just to get an idea of what some of the suggestions look like.

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  8. #8
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    heres another recent self portrait in the bathroom mirror. After looking at it recently after taking 2 months ago I think the color is a bit muddy. What do you think?

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