Cafe
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Thread: Cafe

  1. #1
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    Cafe

    For some reason i feel like i'm missing something esle.

    Care to help, guys?

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  2. #2
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    Well, the anatomy is poor and the perspective is skewed...the big open space on the left does not make much sense compositionally...

    What specifically do you want crits on?

    As the ego shrinks, so the spirit expands.
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  3. #3
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    everything....

    [edit]
    thank you for mentioning the flaw especially the anatomy, i'm grateful.

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    Last edited by Pepper; October 20th, 2007 at 02:00 PM.
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    I suggest, you either crop the picture or add something to the blank space on the left ( clouds, birds, traffic lights ). The horizon line seems to be pretty low, so you should adjust the perspective of the pillar-segments. The monochrome feel looks a bit odd, I would add more blues to the background, and more contrasts to the foreground ( stronger hair-colour, colour variations on the skin, etc.) Her shoulders look a bit flat.
    I like the calm expression on her face. Gives variety to the usual fantasy/ warrior stuff around here.

    Good Luck,
    Troll

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    odd... i really like this image, even with the 'flaws' that previous posts indicated.

    i'd crop a bit off the left, but not as much as everyone else has suggested cropping, but only enough to put the figure's face at about 1/3 of the image width from the right (the rule of thirds for composition alignment)

    i also agree there needs to be more happening, it feels unresolved. this is goign to sound counter-productive, but if you got rid of several elements of the pillars i feel it'd strengthen the piece. since this is stylistically done full blown rendering and chiaroscuro may not add the apropriate visual feel as simplified suggestions of forms would.

    less is more sometimes.

    this doesnt feel like a cafe at all. the background pillars look like a little kid designed a giant robot, and she's walking around with a teacup near its legs.
    "my robo boyfriend loves the tea i make"

    add a simplified awning and some plants, fancy cafes always have that sort of junk. i'd do a proper paintover but i'm stuck with a crappy mouse.

    you could push your tonalities a bit too, it feels washed out (which may be the subtle limited color field you were going for)

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    I like the colorscheme. And I don't mind the empty space - it matches the pale colors in a way.

    I really like the upper half of the image in general. The lower half, however has some anatomical problems: the neck is too long and the shoulders are too round. I tried a quick overpaint to illustrate my point. Even so my version probably still has some anatomy issues, I hope it shows my point.



    Grief - your version is also great, though!

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  7. #7
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    I would go with the giant robot idea, that's delightful.

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    I'm also partial to using the robot. Awesome.

    - Current project <- Crit away!
    - The Whyatt Sketchbook Any tips appreciated

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    The eyes and mouth aren't parallel to each other, unless you were going for a smirk. The lightfall on her shaded cheek and chin doesn't seem to conform to any planes on the front of the face... But I like the colourscheme, Kartoffel's paintover not only corrects some anatomy, but makes her seem even more charming than before.

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    You could add some type of fume or smoke coming out of your tea, coffee, or hot cocoa (Whatever's in the cup).

    The first time I saw this picture, I thought the person was outside in a fancy fantasy type world where you just go out and have a cup of (something). The title says "Cafe" so I assume a coffee shop and not Corporate Average Fuel Community. How about some toast? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caf%C3%A9)

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