Two of swords WIP
 
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  1. #1
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    Two of swords WIP

    Hi, since no one ever comments on my sketchbook =(, I'm still having a hard time with a lot of things.

    If anyone takes the time to help here, I'd appreciate it a lot.

    First, I'm not expert at coloring, something always bugs me about my colors, they don't look as realistic as I want them too, like cartoony.

    I'd also like to know if there are any major anatomy problems, I know of a few already the fingers are a little messed up, but the actual pose makes it very difficult for me to see some of the anatomical mistakes.

    Lastly I know a few parts aren't finished I've kinda lost hope in the drawing so far. I will finish them if get some critique though, Thanks everyone.

    Edit* Here is a bit of info on the peice, done with no reference, photoshop, default brush with pressure sensitive flow jitter.

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    Last edited by Koh; September 19th, 2007 at 02:51 AM.
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  3. #2
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    Ok I'll say a few things. First, I like your style. I don't know why but slightly cartoonish chunky colouring does work for me, even if you don't like it. What you need to work on is anatomy, as there are many many issues. Here's the short list:
    -Legs, too short and chunky. look like dwarf legs. I would guess from the strange shading that you were trying to foreshorten them, but it doesn't work at all. Her knees are strange little circles, rather than occupying the whole leg width.
    -Torso isn't too bad, though she should probably have a narrower waist. It's not an impossible shape though.
    -Breasts are too high, they look like they're growing out of her colarbone. Given the size of her left (our right) one there is not enough space for the other one in that little gap without squishing it painfully.
    -Her arms seem ok, but the one I can see most of is a little wobbly for my tastes, like strips of gummy candy. Some more definition in her elbow would not go astray.
    -Face is ok too, though if you wanted more conventional proportions her eyes are too far out to the sides. When looking straight ahead the pupils of an average person are directly over the corners of the mouth. Her mouth may also be too high, or her nose too long. Pick one and correct it, because they're too close together at the moment.
    -Hands are fine proportionally, but her left one doesn't really look like its griping the knife at all. Find a broom handle or something and hold it, just observe the natural position.

    I'm bad at sketchbooks, have a tumblr!
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  4. #3
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    I've been waiting up all night for someone to give me some crits, Thank you.

    You are right about the legs, I'm sure you can tell they were giving me trouble, thats why they are messy, I already stretched them a bit too, well here comes more. =(

    I also know what you mean about the arm too, it is really bendy, any suggestions on stiffening it up with out changing the pose, maybe, if I made the fingers gripping the sword it would clear it up a bit.

    Well, I actually do like the color on this, but originally I was shooting for something more realistic, I guess I'll learn over time.

    I was trying to make the boobs look pressed by her arms a bit, I'll go back and fix that, I'll go ahead and mess with the mouth and nose a bit too, I already tried this once, I didn't like how it turned out maybe I'll find something in there. =)

    Again, thanks a lot, I've been looking forward to some direction.

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  5. #4
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    Glad to be of service
    I did try to outline what I meant in this:
    Name:  crappacrap.JPG
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    But it didn't work too great, as all I have on this computer is MS paint. For the arm, what I think might help is just making her elbow far pointier. If you bend your arm that much and then slap your elbow with your palm you'll notice what I mean. She's moderately chunky but I don't think she has enough surface fat to make the point as round as it is. Improving the grip will also help.

    I'm bad at sketchbooks, have a tumblr!
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  6. #5
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    MS Paint paintover FTW!!

    - Current project <- Crit away!
    - The Whyatt Sketchbook Any tips appreciated

    Quote Originally Posted by Venger
    sometimes your first thought is always right
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  7. #6
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    The eyes are a bit too high, too widely spaced, and uneven in size. There is no femininity to the face. The nose is too red, and there is too much shadow below so she seems to have a Hitler moustache. None of the other shadows are that dark. The shaggy hairstyle is not very appealing, and makes it look like she has sideburns. There is a strange dark patch of shadow at the base of her throat that doesn't belong there. The breasts, as mentioned, are too high, and one seems to be positioned in the centre. The arms are boneless, and jointed too closely to the torso. The hands do not appear to be grasping the sword handles. The swords are crudely done and unfinished. The torso is too short and as indicated requires a waste. The legs as mentioned, are too short, and the whole pose is unnatural and unconvincing. I would suggest starting again, and using this version as a learning experience, as it fails on too many levels to be salvageable. Use more reference images next time, too. Just my opinion of course.

    Last edited by dashinvaine; September 19th, 2007 at 11:49 AM.
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  8. #7
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    Yeah I guess you are right, I think I'm just gonna go draw something else, oh well thanks for the help everyone.

    At least I learned something.

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