Crits needed - EAT ME! :P
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  1. #1
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    Red face Crits needed - EAT ME! :P

    Hey everyone!

    I've uploaded this pic before on CGtalk and such, where I've got a few really useful comments.
    Because of my eager to create I sometimes forget the most important details in a picture,
    hence the previous chair- issues...
    I the earlier version, I managed to leave the perspective of the chair completely left out,
    so that it looked like some kind of a cutout, and didn't really belong to the environment..

    No I've fixed that, and here's the new version!

    Let me know what you guys think!
    What sucks? What could be done even better?
    I though that it would be a good idea to ask you first, before I upload it again.

    Thanks!

    Here's the pic:

    Name:  masseschimp_CA_critique.jpg
Views: 379
Size:  123.0 KB

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  2. #2
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    That black board on the left top distracts me from the rest.because my eyes first meet the light in the centre, and go up without thinking to the stair. Is that part of the wall? picture?

    If you think you can t Draw, just draw more

    http://www.conceptart.org/forums/sho...=1#post1207915
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  3. #3
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    You have such nice dynamic lighting.

    But, the bubbles don't feel completely a part of the environment, because they aren't reacting to the light source.

    The bubbles that are near to the floor would be casting a shadow, although a very subtle one.

    Don't be afraid to make the ones directly in front of the flames lighter in the center, instead of the sides. If you think about it, it makes sense. Those lighter bits (those two white-ish "c" shapes that define the edge) are where the light is hitting the bubble. The light source is hitting the back of bubble in those instances, not the sides. The only reason the bubbles aren't cast in shadow, like anything else would be if it's held in front of a light source, is because bubbles are clear and we're able to see what's happening on the back side.

    Speaking of which, the lighter bits of them aren't angling towards the light source. As they stand now they're basically all on the same angle. When really the bubble's position in space in relation to the light source would cause those lighter bits to rotate and nearly be different for each one. In most of them this static angle is appropriate (such as the mass of bubbles on the upper right), but on others it's completely opposite (the two lower left bubbles)

    A good example of this, and the previous comment:
    http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thu...bles_light.jpg

    Last edited by Zilant; August 26th, 2007 at 07:03 PM.
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  4. #4
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    Nistarn: Thanks for commenting Oh, don't mind that little tag. It was requested from my friend, whom I also painted this image to.
    Earlier it was placed on the bottom of the pic, in the middle. But it distracted me, so I tried to move it up to the left corner instead.
    Niether you or my friend liked that solution, so I'll listen to your advice and fix that

    Zilant: Thanks for all the useful crits! And for the compliment for that matter.

    I'll fix the bubbles right away, that was an important detail I've kinda missed out.
    Thanks a lot for pointing that out!

    Oh here's the old version of the same painting, if anyone's curious

    Name:  masses_full.jpg
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    Ill post the new version as soon as I fixed all the missing parts.
    Thanks again for commenting!

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  5. #5
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    Thought I'd post an update on what it looks like at this point.
    I've made some adjustments on the bubbles, and some further touch-ups where I had issues with the perspective.

    Let me know what the pic looks like!
    How can I improve the bubbles?

    Name:  masseschimp_CA_2.jpg
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    Thanks for watching!

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  6. #6
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  7. #7
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    Great image ... 2 minor things ... First I was wondering where the bubbles came from ... only to realise there was a pipe ... maybe emphasize this a bit more by using brighter colour ? Secondly I was wondering whetther the bubbles would cast some kind of shadow on the carpet and floor .. even vague ...

    Sedas

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  8. #8
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    hey there, good piece you got here. My crit is to put more than one lighting you got here, it seem really boring and i think it'll help if you had some secondary lighting and maybe a lantern somewhere as well. Also the fire doesn't seem real to me as it does to the carpet and bubbles. The clothing, newspaper and chair could be pushed a little to, up to the carpet expectations. Over all, good piece.

    -Rob

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  9. #9
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  10. #10
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    Sedas: Thanks for the comments!
    Yes I can see now that the pipe is hard to notice, so I'll see what can do about it And the shadows from the bubbles are still under construction. A real challenge I must say!

    zao75231: Hey, thanks for the comments! I'm gonna pay some attention to your tips!

    dashinvaine:hehe I'm sure he'll do just fine I'll put some extra lightning somewhere else in the pic!

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  11. #11
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    it looks to me like the books in the background need cleaning up a little, and maybe some more tone here and there as a reaction to any ambient light from the fire. plus when contrasted to the detail on the floor and stone wall, they look a little flat and maybe some deeper shades on the chimps smoking jacket. other wise it looks like its coming along nicely

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