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  1. #1
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    Becoming more independent

    Don't know if anyone remembers here (and I wish I had a link to it), but roughly about a month ago I posted a topic in the Art School and Appreciation Thread that asked questions about the credibilty of Full Sail. I'm not going to review over all of what I learned in that topic, but the ultimatum that I decided was that this school was not for me, and that i'd have to try my luck somewhere else.

    Flash forward to last night. During that time I had hunted for (and found) a consistent job and went on a ten day vacation at Hawaii. I had the interview the day before I left on the trip, and the manager who sets up the hours told me to call him back the minute I get back. Unfortunately, when I got back from the trip and gave him a call, it turns out that he went on a week-long vacation the very day I returned, so I can't start until thursday. Personally I could have really used that week of work (I have another job that doesn't give enough hours), but as long as I snagged a consistent job i'm not really complaining at this point. Anyways, my college situation was (and still is) pretty bleak, but I had found a few places of interest (San Francisco, Georgia, Hawaii (dirt cheap tuition), and hell, even other places right here in Texas).

    However, anywhere I seem to pick gets consistently shot down by my parents. Everytime I find a solution to one of their problems they just keep adding another one to the mix. I want to major in Art/Animation, but anytime I try to find a place that I have some interest in they keep dashing that idea, saying that it's either too expensive, too far away, or that I just can't function on my own for me to sustain my own well being.

    This is absolute bullshit in my opinion.

    I know that when I go to college I won't be ready for a shitton of things. That's the point of going to college; to experience real life on your own, to figure out things the hard way and become better for it, and everytime I try and point this out they keep avoiding the issue, picking apart another one of my flaws. For example, when I tried to bring this very subject matter up, she said that it wouldn't matter anyways, because i'm not talented enough to even get into these colleges in the first place and that I should just go with an associate degree at the local community college, staying at home in the process.

    Guys, i'm sure you'll all agree with me when I say that that freedom is absolutely necessary if order to make it in the real world. I know that I still have problems being independent, and I struggle with a lot of things regarding common sense, but the fact is that i'm trying my hardest, and my parents aren't giving me a chance to prove myself because they don't think i'm independent enough to live on my own and that my field is very competitive, and there's a very good chance that there isn't any real money into this career choice. They're very smart when it comes to money, and while it's helped our family stay out of the red, it's also limited their trust in matters such as this, so I guess it's sort of a double-edged sword. Right now i'm pretty much at a loss as to what to do college-wise. It's not that I haven't been trying, it's just that I haven't found the one college that pertains to their silver spoon standards.

    The only thing I do know is that I just shouldn't give up on this whole art thing. I've only been taking this whole art thing seriously as a career path for a little over a year, and i'm absolutely certain that it's what I want to do with my life. To prove that I really want it bad enough, I need help in becoming more of an independent individual, proving to them once and for all that I can live on my own, and thus hopefully open some doors that'll get them to at least consider going to college the way it was meant to be attended.

    TL;DR - I need tips on becoming more independent.


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  3. #2
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    Point out to your parents that since they disapprove of all of your college choices, that you need to know from them what college choices they do approve of.

    As for them telling you that you aren’t good enough, there is only one way to settle that: apply and get accepted. Have you got enough of your own money to pay the application fees? For bonus points, find and apply for scholarships.

    Try to be patient with your parents. They are scared for you. Hang in there.
    I think you are awesome, and I wish you the best in your endeavors, but I am tired of repeating myself, I am very busy with my new baby, and I am no longer a regular participant here, so please do not contact me to ask for advice on your career or education. All of the advice that I have to offer can already be found in the following links. Thank you.

    Perspective 101, Concept Art 101, Games Industry info,Oil Paint info, Acrylic Paint info, my sketchbook.

  4. #3
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    Are scholarships still available to claim? I thought that the deadline had passed, and that I could only apply for them before I graduated.

    So basically there are still scholarships up for grabs then, despite the fact that i've already graduated?

  5. #4
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    I would be very surprised if all scholarships were cut off at graduation.
    I think you are awesome, and I wish you the best in your endeavors, but I am tired of repeating myself, I am very busy with my new baby, and I am no longer a regular participant here, so please do not contact me to ask for advice on your career or education. All of the advice that I have to offer can already be found in the following links. Thank you.

    Perspective 101, Concept Art 101, Games Industry info,Oil Paint info, Acrylic Paint info, my sketchbook.

  6. #5
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    theres scholarships and GRANTS available everywhere man. not to mention financial aid from practically any college that will accept you. and of course there are education loans from banks you could get.

    the thing about being in college is that it is VERY expensive and you CANNOT afford it. so get it thru your head now, you're going to be in debt the minute you start. welcome to reality. but hey no problem.. EVERYONES in debt these days and as long as you graduate and succeed.. you can take care of all that later.

    many parents try the same business.. giving excuses for not going to certain colleges because of money, or the distance, or the school itself. but ultimately it is your decision unless there are specific circumstances.

    and you're right.. college IS about growing and getting life and educational and job experience because, face it, you dont know anything right now. i thought i did, got to college.. learned i didnt. its one of those facts of life. so no worries you'll learn all the responsibility and how to manage your money and grades and work and social life.. it all comes with time. so just pick one YOU like and go. fall on your face a few times. survive on nothing but PB&J sandwiches for a few weeks. learn to nap through-out the day instead of sleeping at night. you'll get the hang of it.

    college is a bitch, but you'll manage. whatever you cant do now, you'll learn to do later. and your parents should be supporting you, not discouraging you. you need to explain this to them.

    and i hate to sound like a prick, but if they just wont listen.. time to go on without their consent. if you dont start making your own decisions now, you'll end up being told what to do from now on..

    best of luck man, hope that helps. - JAG
    it's only after you've lost everything, that you're free to do anything..

  7. #6
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    your parents may be on to something.

    Even with a tight budget and unsteady work, you decided to take a 10 day vacation to Hawaii instead of job-hunting and taking care of your school stuff before you found a steady job? That kinda testifies to your parents argument.

    btw... Hawaii is a poor choice for art school, because frankly there aren't any art schools there. You would be better off staying in Texas, living with your parents for the time being, and going to the Art Institute of... wherever. UNTIL you find a steady job, THEN you can think about doing all the other things you want to do. Remeber, your parents are hesitant to do this because it's all on THEIR dime. You, it doesn't really matter because you're not fronting the costs, and you don't bear the financial consequences of failure... only your parents.

    They aren't tyring to get in your way... they're just being cautious because you actually HAVEN'T gotten any scholarships/grants/ or a job. All of which are YOUR responsibility.

  8. #7
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    Woah man, I think you misread what I typed. It wasn't myself who picked to go on Hawaii, that was the family's decision. I'm 18 dude; ain't no way I can scrape up enough money to spend ten days at Hawaii by myself.

    Anyways, I hate bumping this topic from the dead but I feel the need to update/clarify a few things:

    First things first, I managed to snage a job that gives a whole mess of hours. Just checked my work schedule, and i'm working four days back-to-back, not to mention another day a couple of days later, so that comes to five work days out of seven. Not too shabby.

    Second thing: I believe I finally discovered why they were so hesitant on sending me away. Turns out that it has nothing to do with me failing the classes (I'm not that way when it comes to schoolwork), it's the cost of tuition that's the issue. Apparently they don't want me swimming in debt the minute I graduate (something that I probably wouldn't be able to escape until I'm in my 40's). Personally it makes a lot of sense, and while i'd like to go to a fancy-schmansy art school it ain't worth getting screwed over money-wise for.

    So we made a compromise; i'll be attending a year or two at austin community college to take an associate degree in animation. Tuition is dirt cheap, and if they'll let me I might even be able to take an illustration class on the side (or during the summer, either way I think it's important to take as an artist). During these two years i'll be building up the funds and skills to see if I can transfer to a better school later down the line, but the point right now is to not get caught up in debt here, so that's top priority.

    Good news is that I won't be living with my parents. I've done some research, and there are some places in Austin that are actually quite reasonably priced (Hyde park, for example, comes to mind), but there's going to be a little give and take along the way (Hyde park is 10 miles away from where my classes are give or take, so gas will be an issue).

    Independence-wise, i've been taking baby-steps and progressively expanding. For example, I wanted to learn how to play guitar. Problem is, good guitars cost good money, not to mention the other hidden costs (case, strings, lessons, etc). So I saved up some money for three-ish weeks and purchased a beginner/intermediate guitar that's going to last me a good while. Did some research, called a few friends and managed to get the number of an excellent guitar teacher. If there's any downside to this guy, it's that he's not cheap; $30 for half an hour. Again, all on my tab. That's going to add up quickly, so I decide to take a risk with the first lesson and if I don't like how he teaches i'll spring for another guy. Turns out the guy is a really solid teacher, and my money felt justified, so i'll be visiting him once a week to progress.

    Now, this teaches me responsibility because of two reasons: 1) paying that much per lesson means I need to do everything in my power to get the most of it. That means lots of practice, something that i've been doing. 2) Extra wants and hobbies are going to cost extra money sometimes, so I have to put the work in it if I really want it. I'm making damn sure that mom and pop aren't helping me out here, and I hope to really learn the value of a dollar and how quickly it can be spent by doing this.

    Something i've realized is that in most cases, it's who you know rather than what you know that gets you places. If this was a perfect world every talented artist would be getting well-paid for their work, but the cold hard truth that hit me like a ton of bricks is that unless you've got those ties to get you those opportunities, you'll never have anything more than the potential to succeed. Doing everything you can to branch your name out there could be the difference between getting consistent freelance work/possibly a consistent job and very little to no extra work, so branching yourself out socially is key in my opinion.

    Personally I just wanted to play guitar to have a new hobby, but let's face facts here; this is Texas. People like to play and listen to guitars. Just by working on this little hobby of mine, I open a whole new door for me, both socially and business-wise. I usually don't break situations down like this, but i'm in a realistic state of mind right now so I thought i'd just lay the theory out on the table. Plus, you never know where these hobbies might carry you, and who knows; maybe during my stay in Austin, I could go into a different art-related field entirely. Maybe graphic design or something. Maybe not even art at all, I dunno.

    Something i've really been trying to do is to make myself uncomfortable by trying out all sorts of things that i'm not used to. Now right now the first and foremost emphasis has been on outside activities and things that are going to get me through the day while i'm away, so i'm not afraid to admit that my commitment to art has shifted to a close second priority. Maybe it's the rule of give and take being put into motion here, but it would explain just why I haven't been putting full focus on art studies. To be honest it's made me feel incredibly guilty that I haven't been able to pump out the same amount of work compared to when I wasn't working, but I know it's healthy. I have a serious issue regarding multitasking (It's always been redicuously hard for me to do, no matter the situation), and i'm almost positive it's the main reason why I hold myself back. The good news, however, is that ever since I started branching myself out with these activities, i've been able to get more and more done each day, and i'm slowly (but surely) conquering this colossal issue of mine.

    So I guess the original issue that I had has been "solved" so to speak. There are some hiccups here and there, but i've been able to root the problem and now it's up to me to fix what hasn't been resolved yet I suppose. We'll see if I got the chops to make it into this whole art biz. I'll never know unless I try, and i'm sure if I stick with it long enough something will come along the way.

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