character concept

[Aikisean]

Work in progress

http://www.angelfire.com/va3/aikido/samurai.jpg

I did this after I read a tutorial from here. All done in PS7.

I'm still working on it though but crits and comments are appreciated.

[battlemonkey]

ok, where to start:
1- his right forearm is HUGE compared to the other arm.
2- looks like he's holding on to his blade rather than the scabbard.
3- the fingers/hand thats pulling the sword out looks awkward. (try grabbing something and lookin in the mirror)
4- if his sword is slanted downward when he pulls it out, it'll be upside down/ backwards. unless u did that intentionally?
really clean work, u can go a long ways with this.
:D

[Aikisean]

Originally posted by battlemonkey
ok, where to start:
1- his right forearm is HUGE compared to the other arm.

Yeah, I agree. I'm tweaking that.

2- looks like he's holding on to his blade rather than the scabbard.

You would have to train in iaido to understand that you hide the entrance to the scabbard (saya) with the index finger and thumb so as not to make any noise while sheathing.

3- the fingers/hand thats pulling the sword out looks awkward. (try grabbing something and lookin in the mirror)

Again training would clear this up, try sheathing the blade that long and see what finger position you end up with.

4- if his sword is slanted downward when he pulls it out, it'll be upside down/ backwards. unless u did that intentionally?

It is intentional how it is shone. Since he is sheathing his sword, blade is edge up so as not to bite into the wooden scabbard.

The missunderstanding of what is going on is my fault. Visually I should have chosen an angle that would clear some of the previous critiques you made. I should had also said what the character was doing in the first place.

really clean work, u can go a long ways with this.

Thanks. Long way to go though.
:D

[battlemonkey]

ha ha, i was afraid i'd be corrected like that~
:D
believe it or not i was raised in japan, but didnt want to go into details, cant wait to see the final version!

[Aikisean]

This is closer to what I want.

http://www.angelfire.com/va3/aikido/samurai2.jpg

I still feel it needs more tweaking.

[battlemonkey]

maybe u should try incorporating his 'monsho' into his uniform, kinda tie the bg with the character? much better w/bg

[Yaseck]

I think there is something wrong with Your host server - I don't see a thing. Only a red no-image-cross.

[enoc]

nice kinda carton shading, looks really smooth and clean

[sparth]

to be honest, adding martial arts technical comments to your piece wouldn't have changed a thing to the actual result. wether good or bad. in other words, it is not with extra text that you will improve your piece. i might even say that if you feel you have to give so much explanation, that may mean your image itself has too be pretty much reworked to obtain a better result.

i think that the main issues come from a global lack of balance in the character and anatomy of the main figure. no need to change the angle. from any angle, you will still need to study the way the guy is positioned on the ground. and make it look like he's not going to fall on one side or the other.
also, you should focus on the foreground only, leaving the background for later on. you see, your technique for now, is not nervous enough to add such a background. it adds to the scene a very angular and squarish atmosphere. it blocks the image instead of adding anything really new.

the determined aspect of the fighter here is quite interesting.
with a little more work, you'll have a very pleasant image. but do not forget to free your mind from a style that may, for now, appear too smooth and undetermined.

try looking around on the forums, there are a lot of talented peeps who love drawings samurais.
for exemple, "master" barontieri, here:
http://www.barontieri.com/speedpaint/samurai2.jpg
http://www.barontieri.com/speedpaint/samurai3.jpg
http://www.barontieri.com/speedpaint/samurai4.jpg
or even a whole samurai thread, here:
http://www.cafesale.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=3679

hope it helps.

sparth

[Zaphod]

The hand holding the katana should be angled from underneath. He is holding the sword upsidedown now. Yes, I know it supposed to be upside down when it's sheated, but if he stopped right there and pulled it out again he would have the edge facing himself.

Onto the Hakama and the gi. You should study how the folds drapes. The hakama-folds are in the front, between the legs. They should not fold over the knees. If you don't sit down very akward. Also looks like at least his left foot was cut off.

keep it up.

[Aikisean]

Wow. I caught the eye of some pretty impressive artists here. Thanks for the comments as a whole. This piece was actually an exercise using a tutorial I saw from another member. I had no photo reference; it was all imagination except of the technique the character is doing (a rough demonstration of an actual blade sheathing or "noto"). I think I'll add a couple of last touches and leave this one.:o

[Aikisean]

Here is another design

http://www.angelfire.com/va3/aikido/suigetsu.jpg

[Aikisean]

That's it! From now on, I'm using photo reference. Funny how things pop out at you when you take a break from a piece.

[Aikisean]

Messing around.
http://www.angelfire.com/va3/aikido/suigetsu2.jpg