endpiece revised 5/25

[foster]

it is almost done, need to work on her hands and tidy things up. i tried hard to make the woman look good! she is based off of the actress from the zeram films. dave dorman knows her and has permission to use her likeness in the comics he is creating.

this piece is a little too finished for my taste but i kept trying to refine her and and thus everything needed to get refined. oh well.

please go ahead and mention what you think is not working. if it is something i did intentionally i will try to explain my point and if it is just another blunder on my behalf i will appreciate the help.

jon

[davi]

as far as i can see it looks great, the only thing(besides the hands) i could see being improved would be the smoke clouds in the background. i can picture some brights, maybe even whites to help make it less "flat" and "dry". I'm having a hard time explaining my reasoning..

[skrubbles]

I know what you're getting at Davi, but I personally like the fire and smoke the way they're currently rendered. Plus more brights in the upper left corner would pull your attention away from the girl more.

BTW... Love your stuff Jon!

[tegehel]

yup, a blunder.

Like all the other ones.

:rolleyes:

I like mucho, really. Since you asked, I would suggest 2 things: the woman's hand need be bigger, imho.

Additionally, I would make the forearms slightly bigger or more meaty, but not by much. Those seems a tad too scrawny. I'm talking Carpi Radialis muscle particularly. Thus I think it'll also make her right Brachioradialis (at the elbow joint, but inside the arm) look less awkward - that part caught my eye right away.

And Foster offers us the Octogonal Screwdriver Gun! awesome!

C.

PS: Don't bother trying to make your women look "better" to please the masses, just do what you want...it'll look great anyway. I must say I really like her face.

[tyboogie]

i think the tip of the gun is too close to the edge of the piece
it could use more breathing room or could go past edge and get cropped IMO
i guess the binocoulors and hands could use some highlights to help them pop

he's a big guy huh?

love the smoke clouds--like yummy wyeth clouds

whos doing the interior artwork for this book?

[enoc]

wow very nicely done i just love those pants amazing picture

check out my site http://active-x.net/taskinlude/ :D

[Ironspy]

did you intend the gun to have such phalic overtones?

-spying on iron

[darkcult]

C&C guys?
Mmm…bbb… gh..gh.. I’ve lost power of speech for a moment…gasp.. BRILIANT (as usual your stuff is)
thnx4sharing.
Artist doesn’t have to explain everything… right? Let some question marks hanging over heads.
Brilliant and that is that!:chug:

[el coro]

dude, thats awesome! i really like the treatment of the clouds and sky... i could see what tegehel is talking about on the forarms...but other than that, i cant really find anything that really sets off any red flags...i also see what you meann about it being a little too finished, as i like your rougher more expressive pieces more..but sometimes you gotta do the really clean rendering...her portrait is fucking insane as well....you da man-c36
oh...do you model in those pants? :)

[Leviron]

I think the forearms look odd because they look like there are no bones in them. Needs to be straighter in my opinion.
The elbow join is quite strange on the left. I also think the hands are a bit small.

The breasts, the one on the right is probably 1 cup size bigger than the one on the left.

The leg on the left is a bit strange to me. Just above the knee, I think it's too thick when it curves out or the knee joint is too small.

[behemot5]

...it's good as usual...

[kaini]

I feel it's out of balance, Jon. Everything is falling to the right.

That tower in the background(lower right) really bugs me, Because tower and gun don't touch each other but are very close to do that, they create an immense tension which is absolutely not necessary there.

[Dan Milligan]

Hey Jon
Stunning as usual. i'd knock the contrast on the zepplins in the b/g back a little. They kind of jump foreword.
Wonderful colours* (Canadian spelling*)
Love the dutched framing.
Big fan!

[krayz]

Another great piece!

Can't spot anything.. I thought I did.. then had a good think before I opened me mouth.. and found I was wrong :]

[Nekokaiju]

I have to agree with Davi and think the background needs a little more punch, just to seperate the foreground figures. But with all the white in her outfit maybe it needs less highlights in white, but dealing more in the tones of the clouds and smoke. Hickman and the Gnemo project come to mind

I love the palette and the dirgibles. Great image.

[GhostofMacbeth]

Okay, first off it really looks sweet. Since you asked for crits here we go. The zepplins seem a bit wonky to me. From everything I have ever seen they have only a slight incline when assending or descending and are really flat flyers. Right now they all kind of lookd like the just popped and are flying around like balloons that had the air let out of them. :) well that is the only analogy I can come up with at this moment. I especially don't like the head tageted one.

My other thing past the possible anatomy things (which seem mostly fine to me) is the general background. Unlike everyone else that says the background needs more pop I tink it could use a touch of muting. Mostly in color though. It just is a little too warm to me and strais the foreground/background relationship a little maybe. Just a tiny touch of blue and a touch darker in the non cloud areas. Sort of like a blue glaze in oils might work. But that is only my two cents and they might be kind of green ;)

[thomasaurus]

wow, amazing! Its so gritty and beautiful at the same time

[DustinTrimble]

Is there a guy behind her? I really can't tell:)

[foster]

davi, i know what you are getting at. i tried to brighten the clouds but i feared that it distracted from the focus of the painting. maybe i am too close and making mountains out of mole hills. if you want to experiment and post it on this thread please feel welcome.

skrubbles, thanks, it is great to see how different people have different takes. we can all learn that the most important person to please is yourself. if you feel you have given it your best effort and stood behind your convictions it helps thicken your skin.

tegehel, you are right. i have been having a hard time with the forearms and their weaving into the upper arm. i tried to nudge it a little. let me know if you can tell a difference. i have to listen to my words to skrubbles a little more closely. you are right again, we have to paint what WE have to paint. but i do need to work on making my female characters pretty when they are supposed to be pretty.

tyboogie, you hit the nail on the head, i changed the gun. he is too large in proportion to her. i took some rather extreme liberties for the composition. it is good thing i am not showing their feet!

enoc, thanks, i actually made the pants up. i think i lucked out there. i looked at your site, very nice. do you have your own work there as well or is it all a showcase for others?

ironspy, i did see the phallic symbolism but decided not to change it. sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

darkcult, thanks, you mention some of my own philosophy when approaching art. i feel that the more you leave suggested the more the viewer can get involved. of course there is a balance or limit. if everything was vague or areas sere way out of sync in their finish it would have the opposite effect and send the viewer running away.

el coro, always means allot to me when you like a piece! you have been sending me for loops with all of your sketch book work. in fact many of the artist here make me feel the need to start over again. i would look good in those pants! well maybe in my delusional state, but no i did not wear them and you should be glad because i would have sent you the photos!

leviron, i have tried to address the points you made that i also felt were lacking. thanks for mentioning the breast size, i tried to fix. it was one thing that i did not notice. thanks for the input.

behemot5, thanks.

kaini, i understand what you are saying and i worried about that, but obviously not enough. i will try a rotate on the whole piece to see what happens. i also moved the gun and tower. hope it works better know. i think it does. oh yea, i rotated the building horizon line to help us not fall off the right (they are standing on a roof top).

dan, thanks i did knock them back a tad i hope it shows in the update. what's dutched framing?

krayz, oh i wish it were true but thanks for the vote of confidence.

nekokaijo, the clouds, the clouds! they have gone back and forth so many times i do not know which way is up. but thanks for you input as i mentioned to davi, i may experiment a little.

ghostofmacbeth, i love your analogy! i just rather use elements such as the zeppelins as compositional aids. it can be a kind of trap getting too caught up in reality or physics when making a painting that is supposed to work on other levels. never was a dry scifi fan.

jnorish, thanks, love your description.

jon

[foster]

update

[I.was.ink]

I like this piece very much. There's a sort of tension going on between the more "finished" stuff and the "sketchy", foster touch. Which I like, but I think needs a tad more refining in the bg so that it slightly pulls our attention, but not to much. Sorry If it seems kinda iffy. But I think if you refine some parts of the clouds, like add some small bits of lightning within the clouds, or refine the cabin of the baloons. Im not too sure of what I'm saying, but I guess I'm kinda like davi. I like it, but there's something sort of missing.

Sorry for the uncertain-ness. It sort of reminds me of ashley woods style in some places.

I think that the goggles, and definetely the binoculars, need some highlights, or more contrast, cuz at first I couldn't see them.

:thumbsup:

[foster]

tried the crop.

[foster]

hey iwasink, just caught your post. thanks for the input. perhaps i will work on the zeppelins more as well as his goggles.

jon

[Gezstar]

This is fantastic - I love the sense of controlled chaos & the contrast between bg & fg. I also really like the oriental girl drawn with an occidental style (contrasts all round :))

Gez

[foster]

dustin, i missed yours as well and since i am on a reply role, thanks! it is not often that people think the women in my work are good looking.

jon

[Dan Milligan]

Looks great Jon!

Sorry Jon thats the storyboard artist in me. "Dutched"is a film term.It simply means tilting the camera so the horizon slants left or right. You straightened it out in your recroping. feels better in the first.

Go Jon Go

[daarken]

dope as always jon. i think the girl is a total hottie! haha. i like the new fixes you made in the updated version, but i am still not sure about the zeppelin in the upper right. i think if you took it out there would be more breathing room for the viewer, and it wouldnt shout out so much "hey, im a directional element" oh yeah, and i liked the dark shadow you had on her breast in the original one, where did it go! :( awesome colors as well and oh so pretty clouds, haha.

[Nekokaiju]

Here is a quick paintover. with more contrast between foreground and background.
Now I look at it..I think I'm more fond of your subtlety...well not sure...anyways a great piece Foster!
http://www.imagemagician.org/images/nekokaiju/fosterpaintover.jpg

[tegehel]

Jon,

.about the arms: I must confess that I don't see much of a difference as far as the forearms being bigger. However, I see that you reworked the colors and that by itself makes it work.

.about the tilting: I'll have to go with Dan Milligan here. The original tilt was better.

.about the hands: you got it.

.about the magnifying glasses: I thought in your 2nd post, they were too light. The 3rd post corrected that. Looking good now.

Nekokaiju: I must humbly disagree with you. I find that by emphasizing the contrast as you did, my eyes do not focus on the characters anymore, but are looking all over for a point to focus on, because all the brights have now the same intensity everywhere. With the original background, I didn't have that issue. Maybe it's just me.

C.

[Nekokaiju]

Tegehel,
Good point about the highlights taking away focus from the main characters. Interesting. I think your right that they need to be toned down. Good point
But I still think the richer yellows and oranges pop out the figures.

Jon,
Not fond of the crop...and I too agree the original tilting was better.

[tegehel]

maybe it would be worth testing the contrast on the figures alone without changing the background?

C.

[Nordstrand, T]

What I don't understand about this picture is how you can subject it to so much diverse input and still keep your own direction. Not that I'd have it otherwise, of course... the discussion is cool and helpful to lesser artist like myself. :D

If I should add anything it must be that the outline on the gun (left side) is a bit crude, but I presume you're just addressing other stuff for the moment. It looks sweet, and it will sugar up as you go, I'm sure. :thumbsup:

[tegehel]

Originally posted by Nordstrand, T
What I don't understand about this picture is how you can subject it to so much diverse input and still keep your own direction.

You pick and choose the comments you like and apply them. The rest, you keep in the back of your mind and use if necessary, or in another piece. If you listen to everyone, you will constantly change your piece and never end it, obviously. And if you apply each and every idea, eventually, your painting will end up looking like a green elephant jumping in a field of giant blueberries, in other words, so far from the original intent that the purpose of this site would be lost.

Additionally, I think that while the implementation of ideas can be very beneficial, what really is the golden essence of this board is the incessant flow of ideas and constructive criticism offered by professionas and amateurs alike. This source is absolutely priceless.

:nopity:

C.

[Frost]

I should check the forums more often... as I tend to miss a lot of good stuff.

Jon, this is very nice, as usual. If I were to comment, it would be on the lighting... just a little. The sunlight seems to be coming from about a 45 degree top-left from the center of the pic, but the top of the guy in general seems shaded from a light source at horizon height. A few other places in general like that which kind of puts objects into their own space sort of speak. It's not *brutally* in your face, but noticeable.

Heck, there's no way in hell I can draw or paint as you do, so kudos man! It's always a great pleasure seeing your stuff.

Cheers!

[mtomczek]

Nice work, as always.

[Lono]

its beautiful as always Jon.

i liked it better before the crop. and i personally dont have any problems with the upper right zepplin,, matter of fact i think you should consider making it even larger and maby partially obstructing it with the cloud to tie it in to the background more and not distract the eye from the characters.
the characters are great. i do however think you should tone down the front of the guys gun a bit. seems like you have a flat effect going with the rest of the gun and the red front part breaks the consistancy.

-Lono

[mcotie]

Dang, How did I miss this! I need to get out more.

I really hate critiquing your stuff; I don't feel worthy. But you did ask for it. :)

I think it is awesome! I liked the composition better leaning to the right , the way you originally had it.The only thing that might be needed is a little shadow from her casting on to him. just to separate them a little.

Mitch

[davi]

it looks like you dabbled with the brightness on the cloud that was bothering me, so basicly i think it looks great.

a personally nit pick i have about it is... it seems so clean in the foreground yet so dirty in the background, maybe add some ambient fog or something? it's finished in my opinion but i just thought i would throw in a suggestion.

great work jon, can't wait to see more ;]

[Sam Araya]

Hello Jon

Im afraid I can offer any useful constructive insight in your work, save for the usual "WHOA" "WOW" and "OMFG", howeverm, I will try to articulate a small reflexion on your work. I specially apreciate the energy within, there is a certain vibrant force, be in the posse of the character, composition, and overall mood that grabs the viewer right on. And the mood, the mood offers a special kind of tension, its like building a great set which only needs a spark of the viewer to convert the piece on one wonderfully grinding machine.

Your colour sense also never ceases to amaze me, the inclusion of that bright green was particulary effective, it pulls the figures and explosion rigth to the center of attention.

Regarding the debate of the too finished state of this piece, well, I personally see it as stronger as your humm less refined work (using this term loosely, of course), the signature brush work and the particular treatment on composition and color always struck me a very strong expressive parts of your work.

Heh, Im rambling again, over and out.

[foster]

ha! so much in the way of help. cyril is correct in that you take it all in, see what you can use and why you can use it. apply it in your work and grow. sometimes there is allot of feed back that is a matter of taste, this is necessary as well but you must remain true to your own vision in the long run. what i like is when a criticism is made and it resonates with something that was tickling me in the back of my head but out of laziness i do not address. you all catch me in this every time!

i will not reply to everyone this time as it gets time consuming. but i wanted to say thank you so very much for the help and support. it is one of the best reasons to post work here.

here is the revised, revised. the cast shadows on the figures were put in to help them become part of the environment. they were remaining separate from their setting and it was bugging the crap out of me.

jon

[foster]

this should be closer to the saturation levels intended.

[Dan Milligan]

And with that, into my "great stuff" folder it goes. Thanks Jon,you made my weekend trapped in the studio entertaining.

Dan

[amphex]

now THAT looks amazing.
great work man =)

[Loga4]

I would like to say>Amazing,and I
say it.

[tyboogie]

wow--the cast shadows just pulled it all together
slick!

[Arcipello]

hey Foster...really like what youve done so far in terms of the lighting and composition...one thing i noticed though is that the male figure appears to be casting a shadow across the smoke plume in the background....i know thats probably not what you intended...but at a quick glance thats how it looks.
This created the effect that they are giants and so forth and drags the background into the forground....now thats just my stupid opinion, but valid none the less:)

good stuff mate.

[michael see]

hmm..much better this piece..the contrast is obvious and i like the way u composite the whole thing..include the ligthing..
the gal looks asian to me..:)

anticipate to see more of urs

[Bud]

Very nice, Jon.

Looks like you re-worked a lot of the points people brought up. Always be honest and never be lazy - the key to a successful piece. Thanx for sharing it with us.
_Bud

[linK]

The reworked picture is good. In the original I had a hard time with the binoculars and her hip region. Now the contrast is a bit more distinct and I can recognize objects a bit more quickly than the original painting. Good work

[TARGETE]

Wonderful Jon, I actually liked the first version minus the cast shadow on the figures but you know what it still works because of the powerful composition.

Always a wonderful treat to see your images.

J.P.

[Phait]

Perhaps a tad work on the leather pants so that left leg doesnt get lost w/ the darkness of the guy behind her, and maybe some soft lighting on her hair rather than flat black - great piece though.

I'm also wondering where the cable/tube/wire at the back of the gun leads to/ends at..

[chukw]

This a one great thead! Foster, if you're doing more pics of this chick, grab one of the resin kits of her- here's a link. Nice sculpting of the face- think of the lighting possibilities...Iria Resin Kit (http://members.jcom.home.ne.jp/annion/firia02.html)

[MindCandyMan]

I was waiting for the cast shadow! I love it when you add that to your pieces. Spectacular man. I will leave the professionals to critique the work...I just love taking it all in. Great work man always an inspiration that's for sure.

[behemot5]

your pic is better and better ...the shadows on characters increase volumes, contrast is good and the work on the girl's gloves did the pic more interesting .... i really like it, but i can't really help you with a good comments for several reason:
1) i have poor english
2) my knowledge on paintings are not "more rich"
3) my brain is "flat"
anyway... i love your pics :)

[endregan]

nicely revised. the shadow gives it a lot more and is very interesting. the painting technique you do is just done so well :D. nice work

[dodowa]

waooo~great!
unique charm!
Is she existence girl?:)

[carlo]

Hey it's me, Carlo. As always, great work JOHN! I'm bringing a ballpeen Hammer to con this year, you must not be allowed to continue kicking ass.

[I.was.ink]

Wow! :eek:

This just plain rocks, after seeing so many tweeks here and there. It looks FANTASTIC :thumbsup:

[J.Peckham]

what the hell am i doing? replying to fosters work.....i'd like to see the tip of the nose get the same shading as maybe the bottom of the chin? something just looks flat ya know? now please forgive me whilst i receed back into the woodwork

[foster]

well there was much input and it was all appreciated. thanks you all very much!

revisited this painting to change some color, saturation and tiny compositional tweaks.

i have become the reanimator, bringing this played out thread back from the dead. i think i will let it rest after this.

jon

[tegehel]

Wow, quite the change.

As usual, it's awesome stuff, anyway you look at it.

cheers, Jon, thanks for sharing...always appreciated, always inspirational.

C.

[JoshuaTheJames]

I think the girl turned out well... Yo did you say you are going to the comicon?

-Joshua

[el coro]

fucking sweet jesus, jon! that gun looks perfect...you tweaked this perfectly. you never cease to amaze me.-c36

[GhostofMacbeth]

Sweet .. Nice final changes and all

[Boom]

Lovely and very accomplished piece, Jon. :chug:
And the progress pics are just so cool to follow!
;B

[killing.people]

haha *stab* haha *stab* heha *stab* ho-ho-ho! *stab* *pencil breaks*

:eek:

all of em look tite. your style is very dope.

-kill

[R_M]

When Jon makes a thread I want to post a reply... but what is there left to say?

[Don Wilkinson]

wow!!! i was going to crit this piece before the last update, but now that i've seen the touch ups....my crits are cancelled out, AWESOME WORK!@

[Carnifex]

*knocked out and broken pencil*
:googley: