go easy on me

[bnieves9480]

http://img527.imageshack.us/img527/1293/forvero11la.jpghey i'm new to you guys here. my name is brian i'm 25 i stopped sketching for years and recently i decide to get back at it. i could use some criticism. let me know what you think.

[Steph Laberis]

Hey there! Like the sepia tone to this and the simplistic expressions on your figures. However...

Your figures are cropped very strangely and the reapeating shapes (some kind of fruit? Maybe I'm just dense) confuse me. Also, is that a skyline in the background? They look a little like ice cubes...

With regards to the figures, you seem to be relying too much on a cartoon style rather than using basic shapes. The woman's jaw appears very heavy and her neck is quite thick. The guy seems to have more form than she does.

Rethink your composition; do you want the viewer's eye to land on the couple first, then lead into the city? That's where my eye is going...

Anyway, keep at this; start a sketchbook thread here and fill it with as much as you can :)

[dogfood]

I love the title of this one. I can only image where her hand is!

Willow's right on all counts. It seems like you're trying too hard with the cartoonyness (not a word, by the way).

[Steph Laberis]

Ok, I apologize for the scratchiness of this paintover, I'm pressed for time >_< But I hoped this would help you understand some of the composition and posing issues in your sketch.

First off, here's what you have in terms of the shapes of your skulls:

http://flyingclam.com/casketches/couple_paint1.jpg
http://flyingclam.com/casketches/couple_paint2.jpg

Usually if I have to draw a tilted profile like the woman's, I will rotate my drawing paper (or my digital image) so that I can draw the basic skull in a straightforward manner; sometimes, drawing a solid form at an odd angle can breed lopsided-ness with the odd wrist movements and distortion factor.

Now, from the sketch, I get a sense that this is some sort of chance encounter... that this is a couple who have gone their separate ways in this crazy worls, for whatever reason and then one lonely night at the docks, she slams right into him and and and... awkward love! ....at least, the close, awkward angle of your characters, their shocked expressions and the almost matching of thier lips leads me to believe that. ^_^

http://flyingclam.com/casketches/couple_paint3.jpg

http://flyingclam.com/casketches/couple_paint4.jpg

So, I gave the couple some more breathing room. By no means do you have to include this much space, since I'm guessing you wanted this to be an expressive sort of portrait shot, but I wanted to show you how you can use body direction and hands to help convey narrative and movement.

I kept the couple pretty close together at the lips and shoulders, showing more of the bodies to back up my "she walked into him" kind of theory. The hands are poised at a moment of surprise, but if you wanted to keep this cropped closer to the heads, you could perhaps raise her hands to her chest. Notice how their body postures curve into eachother as well (nevermind the bodily region in which those arrows are pointing!)

So, I hope that made some sense. Or helped even a little.

*bows*

I love the title of this one. I can only image where her hand is!


Please tell me you'll be at the next North American workshop. I need to hug you.

[dogfood]

Please tell me you'll be at the next North American workshop. I need to hug you.
Thanks for getting that one, Steph. Sometimes I fear for subtlety on the internet.

[bnieves9480]

My Major Problems Seem To Be Positioning Of Characters And Perspective On The Whole Image. Normally I Design Tribal Bands And Other Quick Sketches For A Friend That Does Tattoos. I'm Trying New Things Right Now. I Appreciate The Time You Put Into This One Thanx