Drapery study for class, due tomorrow (wednesday)

[uRiDiAN]

i'm just about finished with this, but my teacher is a very hard grader, so i want to submit this to as harsh a critique as i can get. this is for clothed figure 2 and he will be grading on how clear and well defined and resolved everything is. there needs to be technically accurate fold construction, and no question whatsoever about what is going on anywhere in the drawing (what's in front of what, which way do folds/bends wrap around, which edges are hard edges, etc)

thanks in advance!

without further ado, here we go:
http://img306.imageshack.us/img306/659/draperyinprogress2oj.jpg

P.S. the photo is only mostly accurate, as there are subtly tone issues and the texture of the paper is grossly exaggerated.

[hayeske]

WOW! This is beautiful. I don't see anything wrong with it at all except for the domed structure under the cloth in the front. It seems to be less worked compared to everything else. The folds aren't as defined and the top arc seems like it may need more highlights like that at the middle of the "W" up top, if that makes any sense. Other than that, this is gr-r-r-reat in my opinion. I would just rework the dome a little bit and define it more like the rest.

Great job! Keep it up!

[uRiDiAN]

good point hayeske. my thought process was that it was further from the light and shouldn't be as bright and contrasty, but i was drawing what i saw as opposed to expressing the form as i knew i should.

thanks, i'll definately finesse those spots a little more

[Bad Brownie]

I think it looks just smashing, very good job. Cloth is difficult, just like hands, feet, etc...now, go do hands and feet covered with cloth! I challenge you! mwahaha

[madster]

Your outside edges, particularly along the RH side, as viewed and along the bottom are too indistinct.
The domed elevation is too low in value, although not by much, for the light refraction from the illumination source. It should be of equal highlight value to the folds directly to the right of it, as viewed.
The "midshadow" of the curved shadow in the lower LH corner, as viewed has too harsh a transition line to the unshaded fabric on the RH edge of the shadow.

~M

[uRiDiAN]

madster,
the outside edges you speak of are unfinished bits so far, so those will definately be taken care of. the dome will also be fixed (in another class now, all this will be adressed in a couple hours when i get home)

i'm not quite sure what you're referring to when you talk about the "midshadow". what i think you're seeing is a cast shadow (and as such, darker) instead of a core shadow, which is what i think you're reading it as. it's a tight fold casting a shadow and that's why there is such a harsh transition line. although, the fact that only i know that because i drew it means it needs to be clarified... :)


bad brownie: thanks... i'll take your challenge... eventually. :) busy busy busy!

thanks again... keep 'em comin'

[uRiDiAN]

well, i'm gonna call this done. i've tweaked the dome shape a bit (probably not as much as i should) and tweaked that hard cast shadow that you pointed out madster, hopefully it reads as what it really is now and finished off the rest. i've also done my best to take a better photo.

thanks for the critiques, all! i'll let you know tomorrow if i get an A :)

http://img472.imageshack.us/img472/2116/draperyfinished6me.jpg

***edit*** looking at this photo, it seems the part i finished on the bottom looks a lot like satin, which wasn't the point, though i think it reads well enough i can leave it alone... yeah? ***edit***

[madster]

I think you're good to go. The finished edges look much better, and as far as a "satin" effect, you don't even have enough reflection, although the highlights on the sharper folds may draw your instructor's eye...(keep your fingers crossed...)

Let us know what feedback/grade you get for this piece!
~M

[poise]

this is a very, very!! nice study, ROCK ON dude!! maybe add more highlight on to the lump.:)

[L. Scott Knight]

Egg-sell-ant! You hit everything I would have critted. I've saved it for my own study and I'll learn from you!

[uRiDiAN]

so.... class got CANCELLED today... grr. but we did have to hand our homework over to an administrative assistant. i don't get to know what i got until NEXT week... i'll let you all know, though... :)

poise: thanks man... since i've handed it in this morning, hopefully there's enough highlight for the teacher... :)

L. Scott Knight: i'm glad you like it... i'm flattered... :bashful:

[uRiDiAN]

so, we got our pieces back today, with grades... i got the only A in the class! w00t! :) (actually, it was an A-, but the AAU doesn't record +/-)

he had some minor crits that i couldn't really put into words effectively without pointing at my piece, but overall he thought it was very strong.

thanks again for the critiques, folks!