Evening All!Newbies first post Sketch For Crit

[TDK]

Evening all. Nice fourm you guys have got here.

Inspired in part by various Dune related sketches found in Bill Sienkiewicz's Sketchbook, and my great love of Frank Herbert’s masterpiece, I drew this sketch of the obese, homosexual, power-hungry, sadistic, pederast Baron Vladimir Harkonnen.
http://www.josephartist.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/Baron Vladimir Harkonnen.jpg
Rendered with pencils and touched up ever so slightly in photoshop. If memory serves, this is the first piece of work of mine that I’ve shown you guys Constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated.

[TDK]

Come on guys. This thread has been viewed over 100 times and no one has anything to say?

[Bennihana]

Ill say that with the feet the way they are, he looks like hes floating in mid air...unless thats what you were goin for.....

[TDK]

Yeah I wasn't too happy with the feet myself. But hey, all drawings and painting are experiments. And yes, he's floating. Next I'm going to attempt to draw Leto II.

[davi]

i would say you need to work on your shading skills, this looks a bit messey and done a bit rushed. The piece itself is so non-detailed and simplified it's not really easy to give it a crit.

[TDK]

Take a closer look, the piece is neither messy nor rushed; though I do agree that I need to work on my shading skills.
Try to be more open minded in the future as a stuck up and close minded attitude can be highly non productive.

[wassermelone]

TDK: Man you are the type I really don't like. You won't accept a valid opinion and show yourself to be as stuck up as you name Davi. It IS messy and DOES look rushed. When a picture is that rough it is very hard to critique. I would suggest you get a book on anatomy and do some life drawing.

[davi]

Ok,
First off you post on a forum and complain that no on replies. When i take the time to give a clean and honest reply you spit in my face. If you ever want to get anywhere in the art world you better put on your helmet.. because you'll get roughed up along the way. If you aren't open to suggestions you will never become an artist, you'll become some guy who does bad art that he masturbates to thinking that he is number one.

Now, you think me saying that you need to work on your shading skills was harsh? *clears throat*

First off it appears you were too lasy to do an begining sketch because you failed to center the anatomy. So step one. Learn anatomy. Learn to sketch.

Second, You shade like a horse. Spend the time to learn how to shade basic shapes before you go and fuck up more stuff.

Third, Get the hell off this forum you tard. Before I Baron Van Pissinyourmouth.

[jerO]

wow, you complained that nobody had anything to say and then complained when they did. It makes me kind of afraid to say anything in case you yell at me.

but i will anyway, since you want feedback.

the arms are different lengths.

the perspective feels off on the belly. It feels like the navel is pointed in a different direction than the man-boobs.

his ankles have hugely different masses... one is 2x the size of the other.

as i myself need to do, work on hands, feet and faces. People tend to nitpick those a lot because they're the easiest things to mess up, and it's a mark of where you're at how well you can do them.

I'd suggest trying to work on line a bit more too. Talking about sienkiewicz, he's all about line. Looking at the piece it's mainly the neck area that i'm concerned with. the way you have it shaded now makes it look like he's got 3 huge fat folds around his neck, i'm not sure if that's supposed to be a collar or not. hard lines would help.

that's it. dont' get discouraged, keep it up. oh, a simple, shaded circular shadow beneath him would go a long way.
cheers,
jerO

[jar]

I would have to agree with Davi, Toaster and jer0 on this one man.

Honestly, this piece doesn't seem "complete." As they have both statedbefore, this piece seems rushed. May I enquire upon your age?

Buy some anatomy books or buy some magazines and study life drawing my friend. And study it looong and hard until it is etched into your brain. It will all pay off in the long run.

If you want to make it anywhere in art, you need to learn the number one golden rule in art. Critisim. It will be kicking your heels all throughout your career. Critisim isn't bad either. In fact it is quite the 360 from that. It is the best thing in the world. Critisim doesn't say that your work sucks or is bad, it just has errors and flaws that others spotted out that you may not have.

Take what people say seriously but not too seriously. The purpose of MSG Boards in my opinion isn't to "show-boat" but to help improve your art. It's all in fun! Art is fun! Don't bring it down.

As for any tips I may have? Well, maybe try to add perspective your art. Perspective isn't just for background right? An example would be your characters floating there. His cloak on our left is showing more, when the right should be. His chest is slanted in the wrong direction as well.

I hope this, Davi, Toaster, and jer0's comments find you well.

[TDK]

Thank you very much both for your mature feedback and your constructive crit.


Originally posted by jerO
wow, you complained that nobody had anything to say and then complained when they did. It makes me kind of afraid to say anything in case you yell at me.

but i will anyway, since you want feedback.

the arms are different lengths.

the perspective feels off on the belly. It feels like the navel is pointed in a different direction than the man-boobs.

his ankles have hugely different masses... one is 2x the size of the other.

as i myself need to do, work on hands, feet and faces. People tend to nitpick those a lot because they're the easiest things to mess up, and it's a mark of where you're at how well you can do them.

I'd suggest trying to work on line a bit more too. Talking about sienkiewicz, he's all about line. Looking at the piece it's mainly the neck area that i'm concerned with. the way you have it shaded now makes it look like he's got 3 huge fat folds around his neck, i'm not sure if that's supposed to be a collar or not. hard lines would help.

that's it. dont' get discouraged, keep it up. oh, a simple, shaded circular shadow beneath him would go a long way.
cheers,
jerO

[davi]

so my first crit was immature? I think the only immaturity i'm seeing in this thread is yourself. And the reason i posted in an insulting way on my second piece is because you were insulting to me, and i wanted to show you the difference between an insulting piece and a helpful one.

i love how you call me close minded and won't accept a crit towards yourself.

[poly_cube]

In all respect davi, the second post was really uncalled for.

If he restricts him self to only sweet talkers/tummy rubbers that’s his problem ..its gona bite him later in life for sure and he’ll most likely have to learn the hard way.

I’m new to this forum- so I take it this art forum works just like any others- if you want people to reply to your art you have to reply to theirs. That’s what a community is all about and how it works.

You’ll probably have to post like a mad mofo till someone reply’s but that’s how the game is played. I haven’t been to a single art forum where that didn’t apply.

nothing really to crit that was already mention on the drawing.

[davi]

i've replied to about 50 post this week, i gave my humble opinion first and then wad disrespected, i find my second post completely called for.

[HruntheBarbarian]

Im with davi. When you ask for criticism, you must be prepared for it. Critcising the people that respond, and that tries to help you, isnt very smart, it only leads you into an a dead end, which is horrible if you want to evolve as an artist.
Even so, maybe next time you should define what you think constructive critcism really is. That way you wont get mad when you dont get the feedback you wanted.

Tip: Try to make a "lineguy" first and then flesh it out, to get the proportions and the stance right. Works for me anyways :)

Good luck

[killing.people]

wow, that was a confusing read.
dont get caught up in it davi. :p

[TDK]

Originally posted by HruntheBarbarian
Tip: Try to make a "lineguy" first and then flesh it out, to get the proportions and the stance right. Works for me anyways :)

Good luck

Cheers-me-dears

[mtomczek]

Man, its people like you, that cant take constructive criticism that ruin the art world. The piece needs work, there isnt any real definition in form or value, and the character looks flat and un-inspired. You need to think about why you are making lines with your pencil while you do them, if you think about the construction of the character, then you are far better off. I hope you re-think things and come back with a better attitude, otherwise adios. I wont be sorry if you leave here and never come back. Acting like a 3rd grader usually never gets people to far in life, that is unless you are in 3rd grade.

[metalwinds]

i know what this post needs :chug:

[Fozzybar]

thx metalwinds :beer:

[Havik]

Its times like this that I wonder why people post if they cant take the criticism that entails the post. Did you post merely to recieve some positive feedback regarding your image? Something along the guidelines of BS fluff that might give you an ego boost? This is a serious art forum and you're going to recieve real commentary. What Davi said was good critique, nothing you get overtly hostile over. Open your own mind and realize that your attitude in this situation is not productive.
In your progression as an artist, you will face extreme scrutiny from your peers, and others around you, if you can't take what Davi said, then you might as well stop drawing now and find a new hobby.

[Fozzybar]

Ok...we got the point everybody...now let's come back to the subject again...

[Jason Manley]

thanks fozzy...


j

[davi]

he started it.

[Jason Manley]

lol yes....but for a moment i thought i was on eatpoo


we encourage crits like davis...crits are often just viewpoints and opinions...if an artist can understand a viewpoint even if they do not agree than that artist will have stronger work in the long run. the trick is to see your pictures in as many ways as possible...and then to pull your own vision out of that. once you know what people will say about your work than you have more ways of looking at it...its like combining others views into your own as you work....no great artist lives in a vacuum and without others ideas.



j

[I.was.ink]

That was a good read! :D

[rubygenesis]

*laughing*

~_~

[TDK]

Hello there. Crikey. That sketch is almost 4 years old and painful to look at. Still, you can only do the best you do. I think i'll redraw the piece and offer it for again for criticism.

[Rhythmus]

To offer my two cents on this peice, the area around the nipples (airiola, I believe) looks way too big, even for an obese man.
And as to all the fighting,
-TDK, take any crits you can get, and even if you don't agree, just pretend you do. It's like arguing with a referee.
-Davi, don't get offended. You're an admin. You're powerful. You don't need to stoop down.