Pirates love Souls

[Tristan]

I'm a new kid on the block. Jr. Illustration student at ringling. I was kinda scared of these Forums but if I'm serious about delving into Concept, I'd better step up and take the plunge.

My computer sucks too much for Painter (Pentium II lap top, 266 mhtz 96 meg of RAM...yeah I know it's a miracle) so I work in the much more forgiving Photoshop 7.

It's a mock bookcover assignment. Feel free to tear me a new one as long as it's gonna help my future illustrations.


http://www.rsad.edu/~thwilson/PIXS/soul.jpg

[MindCandyMan]

Well first off I will say there is nothing to fear on these boards. You are 100 times better at illustrating than me...I can see that already. People are only here to help so there's nothing to be worried about. Secondly...how in the world can you use that computer...you have more patience than I ever would...that is amazing.

Ok on to the illustration...ok I am gonna give you advice but realize that I can't do anything close to this level...

I really like the concept...very intriguing and cool. Couple things...the girl's weight isn't distributed correctly. She looks like she is leaning toward the camera but her legs are almost seem to far away from the camera for her to be positioned correctly (not sure if that made sense)...also her left leg looks like it is coming out of her abdomen. I think her torso and the placement of her hips needs to be revisited. Also the shading on her right arm seems really cylindrical. Her tricep and elbow seem a little too smooth to be real. Her back foot doesn't seem pressed against the wall it looks more like it is floating. The light shining on her face from the bag is great in my opinion...looks awesome. The light on the walls though looks strange to me. I would assume that the bag would be illuminating (affecting) a larger area and not just a certain portion of the wall and floor. Also I think her clothes look like modern clothes as well...she looks like she is wearing jeans and a modern tank top in my opinion.

I love the painterly style you have achieved in photoshop and the lighting on her face and on her sword. The "souls" look really cool as well...very unique. That's a very difficult pose you chose...rough stuff. Seriously though all that having been said...you communicated the idea so hats off for that. I couldn't come anywhere close to this...good job. Keep pushing to make it better. Hope this helped. I am a rookie so take these comments with a grain of salt.

[John P.]

Originally posted by MindCandyMan
the girl's weight isn't distributed correctly. She looks like she is leaning toward the camera but her legs are almost seem to far away from the camera for her to be positioned correctly (not sure if that made sense)...also her left leg looks like it is coming out of her abdomen.

I disagree, because - as I see it - she is taking a step forward from a crouching position at this very moment, so there's nothing wrong with her leaning over towards the viewer(us) as she takes that step.When she lifts her left leg from the crouching position, she would distribute the weight towards her right side(towards us) to "make room" for the left leg to move upward and forward.
So I agree with the drawing.

Feel free to disagree with my agreeing with the drawing. :D

[MindCandyMan]

ah I see...yeah that makes total sense. Something about the pose is weird to me however...can't quite put my finger on it. Not sure...could just be me. Thanks for speaking up NG...I am a rookie so it helps to hear other's opinions. All aside...this piece rocks tristan. I try to be critical cause that's what I would want is people tearing into my stuff to help me get better.

[el_kyrre]

Hmmmm...

I do agree with MindCandyMan!

If this is supposed to be a crouching position with no movement at all, then there is a slight problem with the perspective, as stated above.

On the other hand... if this image is supposed to indicate movement, then you probably chose a wrong "part" of the movement.
To me it looks kind of stiff... it kind of lacks the dynamics to indicate movement. Sometimes, to indicate movement, you have to choose a specific stage of the movement where all the energy of the whole act is concentrated in one point.

You might want too look at photographs of Muybridge to see at what point of movement the "image of movement" can clearly be indicated.
Rudolph Arnheim wrote a book on that topic, if you are interested...

Other than that i think it´s some good work you´ve done there... better than anything I could achieve.
:chug:

[Happeh]

OK. My turn. ;) This is kinda fun.

A lot of crits of a figure can come from the viewers experience of how the human body is capable of moving. An average person can move in a familiar way. An athletic person can move in ways that can seem almost alien.

I think this womans crouching position is possible depending on what kind of physical training she has. If she is a gymnast or a martial artist, she could indeed balance herself like that.

The thing that grabs my attention is the blade. An opponent could take it away easily in the position she is holding it in. It is also a bad guard position. If you drop the point of the blade down vertically, so that the haft of the blade appears to merge with the arm....that would look like a skilled swordsman holding a blade.

Wish I could draw like that. ;)

[davi]

well, the probably with the weight you saw is because her foot to the left of the page isn't at the correct angle to be receding. You should see more of the front plane of the foot.

I think you could add more background in the top right and middle of the piece, maybe just some trees or suggesting shapes of some sort. It's sorta hard seeing what the things in the foregroundare also, they appear to be trees, but the lack of detail at the base of the trunks cause confusion. If you don't want to draw the base of the tree, remember not everything has to be in the drawing to work. try leading that tree off the bottom of the page.

Great work though, nice style.

hope you don't mind all the crits.

[Tristan]

no it's really great. to be honest I'm not really paying much attention to the whole body wieght issue or the leg coming out of the torso. I think some people have a tendency to analyze an image into the ground...

BUT it does make me think about concentrating on gesture trying to show more movement in my pieces...something to make them less static.

and I think I'll work on the back foot some more.

thanks alot...

oh oh I left a bit of negative space on the top for the "Book title" do you think it may be too much?

[brokencow]

If you were to actualy get into that pose...you would fall over.

I don't know if that has been said already.
Also, the colors are a bit too bright for it being in the dark and all.

[Tristan]

Originally posted by brokencow
If you were to actualy get into that pose...you would fall over.

I don't know if that has been said already.
Also, the colors are a bit too bright for it being in the dark and all.


thank you for the comment but this piece was drawn from refrence dead on...she WAS in that pose well over 5 times.

[Theo]

Haha tristan sure kicked your critical asses :p

NEVERTHELESS, I agree about the light from the souls. spread it more on the walls and youve got yourself a masterpiece!

:chug:

-Theo

[el_kyrre]

i did not say that one cannot pose like that...

i just said that there seems to be some kind of weird perspective effect.
And that (in my opinion) this picture lacks dynamics...

Other than that its cool

;)
el_kyrre

[John P.]

Originally posted by Theo
Haha tristan sure kicked your critical asses :p


Not mine! :p

:tup: